幻想快乐

Happy! S01E01

Part 5 June 30, 2020, 7:19 a.m.

听着你不必沦落到那一步
Ah, look, you deserve better than that.
谢谢你能来我表示感谢
Thanks for coming. I appreciate that.
我能和你说的只有
And I will tell you this...
滚出去
get the hell out of here.
-明摆了吗 -是明白了吗
- "Comprendo"? - It's comprende.
-那是西班牙语 -我知道是西班牙语
- It's Spanish. - I know it's Spanish!
佩杜托护士请到门诊病部
Nurse Peduto to outpatient--
好吧
All right, then.
就这样了
It is what it is.
明显不是就这样了
It sure ain't what it ain't!
她要走了真是个迷人的女人
Oh, about time she left. What a charmer.
我不想多嘴尼克
Look, I don't want to speak out of school, Nick,
但我觉得她可能对你有意思
but I think she might have a thing for you!
等一下你们两个
Wait a minute, were you two--
我要吐了
Oh, I'm gonna lose my lunch.
这都是羟考酮搞的鬼
It's the oxycodone.
振作一点萨克斯
Pull it together, Sax.
你出现幻觉了这很不妙
You're hallucinating. That's bad.
这是那药的某个副作用
It's some kind of reaction.
你在和谁说话呢尼克
Who are you talking to, Nick?
我以前认识一个会自言自语的男人
You know, I used to know a guy who would talk to himself,
他最后呆在了一个奇怪的动物园里
and he ended up in a funny farm.
他就像只杜♥鹃♥
He's like cuckoo, you know?
-杜♥鹃♥ -你是我的潜意识
- Cuckoo! - So...you're some kind of manifestation
虚构的影像是吗
of my subconscious, right?
-我没听懂 -所以...
- Yeah, you lost me at - So...
你是说潜艇三明治吗
Something about a submarine sandwich?
深呼吸深呼吸深呼吸
Breathe, breathe. Okay, breathe.
五四三二
Five, four, three, two...
一
one.
没时间玩捉迷藏了尼克
This is no time for hide-and-seek, Nick--
虽然我很喜欢
even though I love it.
再说偷看是犯规的
Besides, peeking is cheating.
-你不是真的 -当然不是
- You're not real. - Of course not.
我是幻想中的朋友
I'm an imaginary friend.
我的想象力很有限
My imagination is very limited.
一般都是在想象怎样能
It usually involves inflicting pain in ways
给人造成最大的痛苦
that may not have occurred to most.
你真有趣尼克
You're funny, Nick.
但我不是你幻想中的朋友
But I ain't your imaginary friend.
我甚至都不敢想象
I don't even want to think about
那是什么样
what that would look like.
我是海莉幻想中的朋友
I'm Haley's imaginary friend!
-好吧 -海莉是个小姑娘尼克
- Right. - Haley's a little girl, Nick.
全世界最可爱的小姑娘
The sweetest, most adorable little girl in the whole world,
但是...但是她有大♥麻♥烦了
but--but she's in real bad trouble,
只有你能帮我救她
and you're the only one that can help me save her!
这边没有出口尼克
No exit this way, Nick.
上帝啊太糟糕了这些药让我都糊涂了
Jesus, that was a bad one. Damn pills are gonna kill me.
-好了 -有人来了尼克
- All right. - We got company, Nick.
-他又回来了 -很恐怖的家伙
- And he's back! - Some real creepazoids!
如果你想帮我
Hey, if you want to be useful,
那就告诉我有几个人
why don't you tell me how many I'm dealing with?
好吧是一二三四五
Okay, it's one, two, three, four, uh, five.
-你确定吗 -嗯
- Are you sure about that? - Uh-huh.
五个五个可以我能搞定五个
- So five. I've done five. I can do five.
他们来了他们来了他们来了
Here they come, here they come, here they come!
滴滴答该起床了
Ticktock, time to rock.
那样可不行
Oh, that's not gonna do.
按住
Hold on.
好多了
That's better.
-你还真是有帮助 -无意冒犯哥们
- Some help you turned out to be. - No offense, buddy,
但我觉得你每次一碰到麻烦
but I don't see how we're gonna save Haley
就晕过去可帮不了海莉
if you keep fainting at the first sign of trouble!
你为什么要小声说话
Why are you whispering?
好了
Okay.
你以后可会连
Drug-induced dementia is a luxury
药物诱导昏迷都是一种奢求
that you will no longer get to enjoy.
我需要你完全集中注意力
I am going to need your complete focus and attention.
小滑头
Smoothie?
看来我的名气更大
Clearly, my reputation precedes me.
我听说你喜欢被人尿尿
Well, I heard you like to get pee-peed on,
如果你是这个意思
if that's what you mean.
多亏了联合
Thanks for the cosign.
这没什么大不了的不用感到羞愧
Hey, there's nothing wrong with it, no shame.
听说很多人都喜欢那样
I hear a lot of people are into that thing.
不要录像
Aah! Scat video!
你说什么
I beg your pardon?
没说什么吗什么
Nothing? What?
混♥蛋♥ 赶紧解决吧
Look, asshole, let's get this over with.
你想要迪斯科·麦克的密♥码♥
You want Disco Mikey's password.
我会问到的相信我
Oh, I'll get that. Believe me.
是啊当然了
Yeah, of course you will.
我是个硬骨头但你会攻破我的没错
I'm a tough nut, but you'll crack it, all right.
不如直接省略中间过程
Why don't we just cut out the middleman
直接解决了吧
and just get down to it, huh?
我都会告诉你
I'll spill the beans.
我也没幻想能死个痛快
I got no illusions that it'll buy me a quick death,
但是管他呢
but I mean, what the hell?
我们都有事要做有人要见
We all got places to go, people to meet.
我自己也做不到更好了
I couldn't have put it better myself.
那孩子坐在那里靠在我手臂上...
Yeah, so the kid is sitting there, lying in my arms...
呼出自♥制♥意大利面的酸味
sour smell of homemade lasagna on his breath
他将他冰冷颤抖的嘴唇靠近我的耳朵他...
as he presses his cold, clammy lips to my ear, and he...
他对于我低语
He whispers it to me...
用粗哑的声音
right before he croaks.
我永远不会忘记他说的话
I'll never forget the words he utters.
他说
He says...
"滴滴答"
"Tinkle, tinkle."
我会问出我想要的信息
Oh, I am going to get the words.
相信我
Believe me.
但是我要慢慢来
But I am going to take my time.
我要拿你以儆效尤
I'm going to set an example with you.
-你想知道为什么吗 -不是很想
- Do you want to know why? - Not really.
因为我是专业的
Because I am a professional.
我以我的工作为豪
I take pride in my work.
我处理方式
I approach my assignments
精准规范
with precision, discipline,
并尊重我的雇主
and respect for my employers.
萨克斯你的名气也很大
You see, Sax, your reputation precedes you as well.
你好像把每个新工作
You seem to look at each new job
都当做一个实现
as an opportunity to fulfill
自我毁灭的机会
some half-acknowledged death wish.
你就是不明白是吗小滑头
You just don't get it, do you, Smoothie?
我的人生就是一个怎么都冲不下去的马桶
My life is an ever-swirling toilet that just won't flush.
我觉得我死不了
I don't think I can die.
走着瞧
We'll see.
音乐
Music, please.
只有我觉得很恐怖吗
Wow. Was that as creepy as I felt?
很恐怖吧
Creepy, right?
我要拿掉你的老二
I am going to remove your penis
切成一片片
in thin slices...
就像香肠一样
like salami...
算是个开头吧
just for starters.
你会花上很久的...
That's gonna take you a long time...
如果你懂我的意思
if you know what I mean.
他懂我的意思
He knows what I mean.
我觉得我看不下去了
Oh, I don't think I can watch.
尼克做点什么啊
Come on, Nick, do something!
你知道的过了一段时间后
Well, you know, after a while,