离婚

-嗯 -我喜欢你的《国民生产总值》系列
- Hmm. - I loved your "Gross National Product" series.
我从没想过我会有机会跟你见面
I never thought I would have this opportunity,
但是 我是不是在这里发现了
but did I-- is it possible I detected a little bit of commentary
昆斯的计算商业化的一些诠释
on Koons's calculated commercialism going on there?
-你在说什么 -他知道的
- A little bit of what on what? - He knows.
昆斯空洞的民粹主义是骗人的粗话
Koons's hollow populism is a fraudulent vulgarity.
好吧 我们求同存异吧
Oh, okay. Well, we'll agree to disagree.
总之恭喜你
But congratulations nonetheless.
黛安 我们让他们聊聊
Diane, why don't we let them have their discussion
主题什么的吧 好吗
about themes and-- and all that, okay?
你看见了吗
Did you see...
我开始创作《国民生产总值》系列时
You know, when I, uh, started the "GNP,"
我还以为我是在很好地模仿昆斯
I thought I was doing a vicious parody of Koons,
但我完成后 我意识到
but when I finished it, I realized,
该死 我只是在复♥制♥他
"Shit, all I did was replicate him."
很遗憾它没有很受欢迎
I'm sorry it wasn't more well-received.
但是过了几年 人们会赶上的
But, you know, give them a few years, they'll catch up.
谢谢 我很期待死后得到适度赞誉
Thanks. I look forward to being mildly appreciated after my death.
谁不想呢
Who doesn't?
妈的
Fuck it.
喝一杯吧
Let's get a drink.
聊聊其它的骗人的粗话
Talk about all the other fraudulent vulgarities out there.
-你有列表吗 -谁没有呢
- You've got a list? - Who doesn't?
我们失去了出其不意的可能性 杰里
We completely lost the element of surprise, Gerry,
就因为你打给了我家
because you fucking called the house.
我同意 那是我的错
Yes, I-- I agree. That was my bad.
但我们得小声点吗 因为我妻子
But can we keep it down a little bit out here because my wife is--
我知道 你妻子在睡觉
Yeah, I know. Your wife's asleep.
所以我们在车里 笨蛋
That's why we're in the car, dipshit.
她给我们做的 大家都能吃
She made these for us, so-- they're for everyone.
该死 现在弗朗西斯会开始找律师了
Shit, now Frances will start looking for a lawyer.
她已经找了一个 马克斯·布罗德什么的
She already has one. Max Brod-something.
-马克斯·布罗德金吗 -对 你认识他吗
- Max Brodkin?! - Yeah, you know him?
希望是 我是说 我知道他
I wish. I mean, I know of him.
-他是个传奇 -我完蛋了吗
- He's a legend. - So, am I fucked?
没有 问题是我能做吗
No! The question is am I up to it?
不能 因为你不是离婚律师
No, because you're not a divorce lawyer.
你为什么对他不满
Why are you down on him?
是你让我雇他的
You told me to hire him!
我不知道他会给你家打电♥话♥
I didn't know he was gonna call the house.
各位 没事 都是法律
Guys, it's fine. It's all law.
-才不是 杰里 -罗伯特 听着
- It's not all law, Gerry. - Robert, listen.
这对我来说是个很棒的机会
This is an amazing opportunity for me.
我可以从那人身上学到很多
I could learn a lot from that guy.
如果我能跟他上法庭 我愿意要更少的钱
I would lower my rate just to be in court with him.
可以考虑
That's something to consider.
你们是笨蛋双胞胎吗
What are you guys, the dipshit twins?!
这不是教学医院 而是我的生活
This isn't a teaching hospital. This is my life, man.
-我需要一个真正的律师 -你付得起钱吗
- I need a real goddamn lawyer. - Can you afford one?
付不起 蠢蛋 因为我有个糟糕的会计
No, I can't, dumbass, because I have a shitty accountant.
知道吗 尼克说得对
You know what? Nick's right.
我得提升档次了 就从现在开始
I gotta step my game up into high gear starting right now.
杰里 你被炒了
Gerry, you are officially fired.
唐 我留着你
Don, I'm gonna keep you on.
才不是 你♥他♥妈♥也被炒了
Bullshit! You're fucking fired, too!
杰里 下车
Gerry, get out of the car.
唐 你开到我的车子那
And, Don, you drive me back to mine.
快 杰里
Move it, Gerry.
-谢谢 -跟我讲讲弗朗西丝·迪弗雷纳画廊吧
- Thank you. - So, tell me about the Frances DuFresne Gallery.
首先 还没开门呢
First of all, it's not even open yet.
-为什么开在海斯廷斯 -因为我住那
- Why Hastings? - Because I live there.
还有 因为我每次经过
And because every time I walk past
海斯廷斯的"画廊"时
an "Art gallery" In Hastings,
我都想自杀
I, um-- I wanna kill myself.
都是蜡染布 木雕长颈鹿和陶器
It's all batiks and carved giraffes and pottery.
-美化的礼品店 -没错
- Glorified gift shop. - Exactly!
我想着就因为不住在曼哈顿
And I think just because you don't live in Manhattan
或者巴黎和伦敦
or, you know, Paris or London
并不代表你不配
doesn't mean that you don't deserve
看一些美丽
to look at something beautiful
刺♥激♥和挑战的东西
and provocative and challenging.
有顾客吗
Does a clientele exist?
我想我很快就会得知了
Uh, I guess I'll find out soon enough.
如果最初几个月里生意不大好
Well, if things are a little slow the first few months,
别慌张 别在画廊里开个咖啡吧什么的
don't panic and add, you know, a fucking coffee bar or something.
不可能 我宁愿烧掉它
No way. I'd sooner burn it to the ground.
做得好 卡森
Well done, Carson.
你又一次从我手里抢走了保险箱
Once again, you've snatched the strongbox out from under me.
我在聊天呢 古斯塔夫
I'm in the middle of a conversation here, Gustav.
不幸的是 亲爱的卡森 我一直在这里转悠
Unfortunately, dear Carson, I've been circulating the room.
听说她不如"黛安和尼克"中的
Word is she doesn't have the money
她的朋友黛安那么有钱
that her friend Diane of "Diane and Nick" Have.
-你是个醉汉 -但我的画在惠特尼美术馆展览着
- You're a drunk. - I'm a drunk who had pieces in the Whitney.
就一幅画
You had one piece in the Whitney
因为艾尔·埃莫瑞听说你得了膀胱癌
because Al Emery heard you had bladder cancer.
你症状缓解后在那里展览了多少幅画
How many pieces have you had in there since you went into remission?
-真是太不友好了 -但是很准确
- That's incredibly unkind. - But accurate.
也许我的确喝了太多
Perhaps I have had too much to drink.
帮帮我
Do help me out.
你这只绝望的猪 我要杀了你
You desperate pig! I'll kill you!
我 我没事
Hey! I'm-- I'm okay!
两位
Guys!
拜托 两位 天啊
Please, guys. Guys-- oh, my God!
谁要来...
Is somebody gonna...?
混♥蛋♥ 混♥蛋♥
Dupa! Dupa!
走吧
Let's go.
-谢谢你这么晚还见我 -没事
- Thanks for meeting me this late. - No problem.
我不调解的真正原因
The real reason I didn't go through with mediation
就是我太丢人了
is because I was too embarrassed.
我的事业处于低谷
It's a real low point in my career.
身负重债
Horribly in debt.
我住在工作场地
I'm living in a working job site.
现在离婚太糟糕了
This is a terrible time to go through a divorce.
你开玩笑吗 这是最好的时机
Are you kidding me? This is the perfect time.
那个撒谎出轨吸鸡♥巴♥的即将成为前妻的贱♥货♥
Look, that lying, cheating, cock-sucking cunt of a soon-to-be-ex,
她要给你付赡养费
she could pay you alimony.
也许你的用词
You know, maybe in terms of language
可以委婉点
you could maybe notch it down a bit.
毕竟那是我孩子的妈妈
Mother of my children.
门就在那里
Look, the door's right there, you know,
如果我们开始前你就要退缩
if you're gonna puss out before we've even begun.
不要吗
No?
我想也是
I didn't think so.
开始派对吧
Let's get this party started.
真好玩 真高兴我们去了
That was fun. I'm glad we did that.
很糟糕
It was awful.
那人想跟我聊天
That guy only wanted to talk to me
只是因为他以为我有钱
because he thought I had money.
所以呢
So what?
唯一想跟我聊天的人
The only guy that wanted to talk to me
以为我是场地经理
thought I was the manager of the venue
我可以给他女儿的婚礼打个折
and that I could get him a good deal on his daughter's wedding.
-那是怎么回事 -不知道
- How did that happen? - I don't know.
但我就顺着说了 我们周四一起吃午餐
But I just went with it. We're having lunch on Thursday.
那些画家真有异国情调
Those artist types are so exotic.
也就是说混球
AKA assholes.
-并非所有画家都是混♥蛋♥ -对
- Not all assholes. - Right.
只是派对的那些
Just the ones at that party.
先生 就是
Oh, um, sir, it's just--
右边的最后一栋房♥子
it's the last house on the right there.