我为喜剧狂（2006）
30 Rock S01E07
Part 1
Jan. 13, 2021, 12:18 p.m.
Why is there hair everywhere Did you shave in the kitchen
怎么这里全是毛 你在厨房♥刮毛
The water in here is softer.
厨房♥的水更柔和
Look at this ski-jumping idiot Bode Miller. What kind of a fruity name is Bode
看看这个跳台滑雪的笨蛋 居然叫Bode Miller 这是什么狗屁名字呀
That cereal has the Olympics on it It must be eight months old.
上面还有奥♥运♥会运动 这东西至少放八个月了
When you and me have kids
等我们有孩子
we're gonna give them good names like Shannon or Rick.
我们要他们取个好名字 就像Shannon和Rick
When we what
等我们什么
When we have kids dummy. Come on.
等我们有孩子 笨笨
Yeah I gotta go. Uh...
我要走了
Are you gonna be home later I gotta talk to you about something.
你会准时到家吗 我要和你谈点事情
I'll be right here.
我会准时的
Look at this maze. It's so easy.
看这个迷宫 也太简单了
You have to go in here and out there.
你只要从这里进来 那里出去
Be home early okay
早点回家 记得
Come here sweetheart.
过来 亲爱的
Oh Dennis. I just did my hair.
Dennis 我刚把头发弄好
Oh that's my girl.
这才是我的女人
Now make sure you drink plenty of fluids and get something to eat.
记得多喝水 再吃点东西
Don't do anything strenuous tonight. Don't hit the clubs.
别太累 别泡吧
No I'm going straight home actually. I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight.
不 我会直接回家 我今晚要和我男朋友分手
I can't take it anymore.
我再也受不了了
Hmm 35 single no children.
35岁 单身 没有孩子
Three sexual partners in the last ten years.
过去10年里有过三个性♥伴♥侣♥
I don't know doll. Maybe it's time to settle.
怎么说呢 孩子 也许是时候稳定下来了
Chocolate chip or butter crunch
巧克力饼 还是黄油多拿滋
(Jenna) I can't believe that this is happening to me.
不敢相信这会发生在我身上
It's just not fair.
这不公平
(Pete) You're right. This business is unfair.
说的没错 这一行就是没有公平可言
What happened
发生什么了
Jenna was supposed to be on the Conan show tonight but...
Jenna本来今晚要上柯南秀的 可是
I got bumped.
我被顶替了
Oh you know that kind of thing happens.
这种事总是难免的
Jack bumped her and put Tracy on instead.
Jack让Tracy顶替她
Jenna you can't let this kind of thing get to you.
Jenna 你不应该让这种事情困扰你
I just feel like everything always gets taken away from me.
我只是觉得好事总是轮不到我
No that's not true. What about that movie you did last summer
不 不是这样的 你去年夏天不是还拍了部电影吗
"The Rural Juror"
"The Rural Juror"
Yeah The Rur-- That one.
对 The Rur 就是那部
Rural Juror apple three take one.
Rural Juror apple three 第一遍
A terrible title.
什么鬼片名
When does that come out
什么时候上映
"The Rural Juror" opens in selected theaters December 18th.
"The Rural Juror"11月18在部分院线上映
Does Jack Donaghy even know I'm in The Rural Juror
Jack Donaghy知不知道我拍了The Rural Juror
Maybe if he knew I have a film career he would treat me with more respect.
也许如果他知道我拍过电影 他会多对我尊重点
Jenna to the set please.
Jenna请上台
Jenna to the set for Rodney Stink Confirmed Bachelor.
Jenna请上台表演Rodney Stink Confirmed Bachelor
I will tell him.
我会告诉他
I will tell him that you are in a feature film called The Rrr Jrr.
会告诉他你拍了部即将上映的电影叫The Rrr Jrr
What the hell's her movie called
她的电影到底叫什么
I don't know.
不知道
She's been talking about it for a year.
她都说了有一年了
I can't ask her now.
我不能去问她
I can't believe Jack did this to her.
真不敢相信Jack会这么对她
I can't believe Conan's gonna have Tracy on as a guest again
真不敢相信Conan还敢再叫Tracy上他的节目
considering what happened the last time.
想想上次发生了什么
You seem like you have a nice chemistry...
你看上去气色不错啊
I am a stabbing robot. I will stab you.
我是刺客机器人 我要刺你
Oh jeez. All right no okay.
行了 别这样好吗
All right all right. That's great Tracy.
好了 好了 非常好 Tracy
We'll take a break. We'll be right back.
休息一下 马上回来
Hey Clariss can I see Josh's Stone Phillips wig
Clariss 我能看看Josh用的Stone Phillips的假发吗
Oh great.
很好
Do you mind if I pop it on you actually
我能放你头上试一下吗
I want to see the shape of it.
我想看看效果怎么样
Please it would make my wife's dream come true.
求之不得 这会让我老婆梦想成真的
Handsome
英俊不
You find me handsome Yes very much.
我还是挺帅的了吧 对 非常帅
You know I used to be very rich.
知道吗 我曾经非常有钱
Hello.
你好
Oh hi. Sorry.
抱歉
I know you're wearing that as a joke but it makes you look younger
我知道你们在开玩笑 不过假发的确让你更年轻了
and more confident and I think you should consider it.
而且更自信了 我觉得你应该考虑一下
Can I see you in my office
到我办公室一下好吗
Yeah hang on a second actually.
好的 不过稍等一下
Why did you bump Jenna from Conan
你为什么不让Jenna上柯南秀
Because if I have a choice between an international movie star
因为如果要在一个国际影星
and a woman who does commercials for ShopRite--
和一个为ShopRite拍广♥告♥的女人中选择
No no no.
不 不 不
Jenna doesn't do those commercials anymore. She got fired.
Jenna不再做那个广♥告♥了 她被炒了
I don't do these things just to drive you crazy Lemon.
我做这些事不是为了针对你 Lemon
I do them for the good of the show.
我是为了节目好
I'm the one that always has to clean up the mess afterwards.
但是事后擦屁♥股♥的总是我
That's why my job is way better than yours.
所以说我的工作比你的好得多
Way better.
好得多
Conan.
柯南
Tracy's really excited to be back on your show.
Tracy很高兴能再上你的节目
I don't know Jack.
我不确定 Jack
He's kind of a loose cannon and I like to surround myself
他有点难以控制 我希望上我节目的人
with people that don't try to stab me.
不会想要刺我
Tracy's feeling a lot better now. He's under a doctor's care.
Tracy现在好多了 他一直在看医生
That's what they said about Hasselhoff then he tried to make out with me during a commercial break.
他们也是这么说Hasselhoff的 可他在广♥告♥时间居然想和我亲热
Conan this is important to me.
柯南 这对我很重要
So we can either do this the easy way or the hard way.
如果软的行不通 我只能来硬的
What's the hard way
什么是硬的
You do a live Christmas Eve special from Kabul every year until the war on terror is won.
每年你都要去喀布尔去做圣诞特辑 直到战争结束
Tell Tracy I'll see him tonight. You black Irish bastard.
告诉Tracy今晚见 黑心爱尔兰大混♥蛋♥
Back at you man.
好像你不是那样
I have to be charming on Conan tonight.
今晚上柯南秀我要显得迷人些
This is my chance to redeem myself with mainstream America.
这是我再次回归主流的绝好机会
Okay well just tell us some things about your life and we'll try to punch it up and make it talk show-worthy.
告诉我们你的一些私人生活 我们会让它们说出来时更加有意思
Maybe something about you and your wife.
谈谈你的妻子
Me and my wife like to play "rape." She go in the bathroom and do her hair.
我们喜欢玩"强♥奸♥"游戏 她在卫生间整理头发
Then I put on a ski mask... Okay not that.
然后我戴上滑雪帽 还是算了
Hey uh you got anything about being a dad
成为父亲的事呢
People eat that garbage up.
观众很吃这一套
I like to walk around my house naked to remind my oldest son
我在家里喜欢躶体 为了提醒
who's still got the biggest ding dong.
大儿子谁的JB最大
No.
不行
I can tell the story of how I met Sharon Stone.
我可以说说遇见莎朗·斯通的事
Oh what was that
说说看
I was pooping in the ladies' room at the Ivy...
当时我正在Ivy的女厕所尿尿
No.
不行
My hair hurts.
头发好疼
Anybody gonna answer the phone
谁能接下电♥话♥
What phone
什么电♥话♥
Is anybody gonna answer the phone The phone
接下电♥话♥ 电♥话♥
It's ringing Ring Ring
电♥话♥在响 Ring Ring
So you wanted to see me
你要见我
Oh Lemon wonderful.
Lemon 非常好
I'm introducing Jack Welch with a dinner at the Waldorf.
我要在华道夫的晚宴上介绍Jack Welch
What's a funny little quip I could open with
你有什么有意思的开场白
That's why you called me up here
你就因为这个叫我来
Okay.
好吧
Uh... "Good evening.
晚上好
It's great to be here at the beautiful Waldorf Astoria.
欢迎来到美丽的华道夫·阿斯多里亚酒店
"I haven't seen this many white people in tuxedoes since the Titanic."
自从泰坦尼克号♥沉了之后我就
Lemon this is not open mike night at the Bryn Mawr student union.
Lemon 这可不是什么布尔茅尔学院学生联盟的开场白
This is a $1 000 a plate fund raiser.
这可是价值1千美金的晚宴
Okay uh... How about
好吧 这个怎么样
"Wow $1 000 a plate.
1000美金一顿饭
我为喜剧狂（2006）
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