邻家心理医生（2021）

（根据文德里和彭博的播客改编）
（2010年）
需要什么吗
Get you anything?
你好
Aloha.
谢谢
Mahalo.
-舍曼拉比 -你好 小子
-Rabbi Sherman. -Hello, boychick.
-还是应该称你为乒乓大♥师♥ -没错
-Or should I say the king of Ping-Pong? -It's true.
-小心点 他球技高超 -谢谢
-Watch out. He has ninja moves. -Thanks.
哎呀 缇雅 你都长这么大了 还是说我缩小了
Thea? Either you're growing, or I'm shrinking.
嗨 尼克和托尼餐厅 是吗
Hey, Nick and Toni's, right?
-周三晚 我打给你 -好的
-Wednesday night. I'm calling you! -You got it.
你一定会很爱玉米的
You're gonna love the corn.
来自圆沼泽农场 我亲自剥的皮 他在这呢
Round Swamp Farm's. I shucked it myself. There he is!
大家快躲
Everybody, duck!
-别说 想都边想 -什么
-Don't say it. Don't even think it. -What?
-我不会再和你打高尔夫了 -为什么
-I'm not playing golf with you again. -Why not?
“为什么 ” 上次那不叫高尔夫 那比较像是打曲棍球
"Why not?" That wasn't golf. That was more like hockey.
我觉得自己有生命危险
I was afraid for my life.
你们试过热水浴池了吗 你们应该去试试
Have you tried the hot tub yet? You should try the hot tub.
就连你也不应该错过
Even you can't miss that.
噢 我应该…
I ought to…
本杰明 你好吗
Benjamin, what's going on?
你看起来好热 像是快晕倒了
You look so hot. You look like you're gonna faint.
我不适合呼吸新鲜空气
Fresh air doesn't agree with me.
那是因为你妈妈把你养成了温室的花朵
Well, that's because your mother raised you as veal.
来吧 我们进去吧 那里有空调
Come on. Let's go in here, all right? There's air-conditioning.
有数百部电影 都是奥斯卡获奖影片
There are hundreds of movies, all Academy Award winners.
小心地滚球
Mind the boccie balls.
丽莎 艾克赫什科夫
Lisa. Ike Herschkopf.
-嗨 -多谢你前来
-Hi. -Thanks for coming.
-你一如既往地美丽 -谢谢
-You look gorgeous as always. -Thank you.
我们能很快地拍一张合照吗
You don't mind if we get a picture real quick?
-没问题 -好的 哪个按钮…
-Sure. -Okay, so which button is--
-最上面 -我需要转动…
-It's on top. -Do I have to wind it--
不用 已经设置好了
No, no. It's ready.
好的
Okay.
-最上面 -我按错了
-Top. -I pressed the wrong one.
-我能去找眼镜吗 -不 你…
-Can I just go find my glasses? -No. You know--
没事的 嘿…过来
It's okay. Hey, hey! Come. Come here.
-谢谢 -好的
-Thank you. -Okay.
过来 帮我们拍一张合照
Come here. Can-- Take this picture of us.
-玩得还开心吗 太好了 -是的
-Enjoying yourself? Great. -I am. I am.
真美 我很喜欢这房♥子
Gorgeous. I love the house.
谢谢
Thank you.
-成功 -太好了
-Success. -Great.
来 我想带你参观牛 我是在城里的画廊买♥♥的
Come, I wanna show you these cows. I got 'em in a gallery in the city.
-好的 -特别有意思
-Okay. -They're so fun.
能把湿毛巾收一下吗
Collect some of these wet towels, will you?
（1982年）
好 留在这间房♥里
Okay, stay in this room.
别走 然后…嘿 你们要去哪 回来
Stop. And then-- Hey, where are you going? Back in here.
我去找他…他在…来吧 和你舅舅打声招呼 莉兹
I'm gonna look for him-- There he-- Come on. Say hi to your uncle, Lizzie.
不好了 菲丽斯 快叫除虫人员来
Uh-oh. Phyllis, call the exterminator.
这栋大楼里闯进了一堆小害虫
We've got pesky little critters running around in the building.
我和赫什科夫医生预约了
I made an appointment with Dr. Herschkopf
-是帮你预约的 在今天下午 -天啊 我被它们缠住了
-for you for this afternoon. -Oh, my gosh. They're all over me.
它们到底是什么
What are they, exactly?
来瞧瞧 它们有很多毛 还有…看这小尖爪子
Let's see. They have a lot of fur, and-- Look at these little sticky paws.
-你听见了吗 -我不能去
-Did you hear me? -I can't go.
-为什么 -听着
-Why can't you go? -Look,
-我不想和某个陌生人聊 -他不是陌生人
-I don't want to talk to some stranger-- -He's not a stranger.
是戈德伯格拉比推荐的
Rabbi Goldberg recommended him.
不 我懂…嘿
No, I know. I know. Hey!
别挠我痒痒
Don't tickle me.
好了 姑娘们 别闹了 别烦你的马蒂舅舅了
Okay, girls, girls. Knock it off. Leave your Uncle Marty alone.
走吧 趁你们没把衣服弄脏 我们快拍张照
Come on, let's take the picture before you ruin your outfits.
姑娘们 快来…快点 来吧
Girls! Come. Come, come, come. Let's go. Come on.
把电♥话♥放下 谢谢
Put the phone down, please.
那是你的吗
Is that yours?
不 好的 谢谢 你们看起来真可爱
No. All right, thank you. You look adorable.
快看 问题来了
Look at this. Here's the question.
有没有足够大的捕虫器 来捉住这些小害虫们
Do they make traps big enough to capture all these pesky critters?
一定有的 后面就有
I'm sure they do. We got some in the back.
没错 布鲁斯 去拿扫把
Yeah, we do. Bruce, go get the broom.
对 我们得拿…
Yeah, we gotta get the--
-天啊 我的脑袋 -去拿扫把
-Oh, my God! My head! -Go get the broom!
所以 你会去吗
So, will you go?
我没必要去见赫什科夫 好吗 我没事
I don't need to see Dr. Herschkopf, okay? I'm totally fine.
不好
Uh-oh.
看来楼里真的进了害虫
Looks like we do have some vermin in the building.
糟糕
Oh, shoot!
-好的 相机你拿着 -是
-All right, you take the camera. -Yeah.
-我去应付她 好吗 -好吧
-I'll deal with her. Okay? -Yeah, okay.
好吧
Fine.
来吧
Here we go.
-黛博拉 -他在哪
-Deborah! -Where is he?
见到你也很高兴
Good to see you as well.
-你把我的留言转告马蒂了吗 -是 八条都转告了
-Did you pass on my messages to Marty? -Yes. All eight of them.
你确定 因为他没回我电♥话♥
Are you sure? 'Cause he didn't call back.
也许是因为你们分手了
Maybe that's because you two broke up.
不 你不能通过传真和某人分手 菲丽斯
No. You don't break up with someone by fax, Phyllis.
我同意 但那也不是最糟的方式
No, I agree, but there are worse ways.
我的丈夫通过和他的秘书上♥床♥ 来结束我们的婚姻
My husband ended our marriage by fucking his secretary.
所以 我宁肯用传真
So, I'd take a fax any day.
好吧 我不在乎 我只是…好吧
Okay, I don't really care. I just-- Okay.
我想见他
I wanna see him.
-他不在这 -他不能一直躲我
-He's not here. -He can't keep hiding from me.
我很肯定他能
I'm pretty sure he can.
他欠了我
He owes me.
得了 别再说这套胡话了 我受够了 今天我没空应付这个
Okay, let's cut this bullshit. I can't. I can't with this today.
他什么也不欠你 已经结束了
He owes you nothing. It's over.
我要和他谈一件事
There's something I need to talk to him about.
是私事
It's a private matter.
你又怀孕了
Are you pregnant again?
-你好大的胆子 竟然这样指责我 -你没有吗
-How fucking dare you accuse me of that? -Didn't you?
-你去死吧 菲丽斯 -听我说
-Fuck you, Phyllis. -Listen to me.
马蒂是个好人
Marty is a nice guy.
事实上 他人太好了 但我就没有这个问题
In fact, he's too nice. But I don't suffer from that particular affliction
我不会任由你利用他
and I will not let you exploit him.
你是什么 他的看门狗
What are you? His guard dog?
比那更可怕 我是他的妹妹
Worse. I'm his sister.
看门狗只会咬你
A guard dog will just bite you,
但是妹妹会把你该死的气管扒出来
but a sister will rip out your goddamn trachea
像吹笛子一样演奏它
and play it like a fucking flute.
明白两者的不同了吗
You get the difference?
这和你毫无关系 菲丽斯
This is none of your goddamn business, Phyllis!
这点你大错特错
That's where you're wrong!
马蒂的事就是我的事
Marty is my business.
好吧
Okay.
好的
Okay.
如果他今天下午不给我打电♥话♥ 他就有麻烦了
If he doesn't call me by this afternoon, there's gonna be trouble.
那么看来一定会有麻烦
Well then, I guess there'll be trouble.
-对 会有很多麻烦 -不 我第一次就听到了
-Yeah, there's gonna be a lot of trouble. -No, I heard you the first time.
-滚吧 菲丽斯 -真友善
-Kiss my fucking ass, Phyllis. -Nice.
该死的贱♥人♥
Fucking bitch.
真友善
Nice.
数三声后给我一个大大的微笑 一 二 三
Big smiles on three. One, two, three.
天啊 好吧 这样好了
Oh, my God. Okay. You know what?
别笑了 别作出那么诡异的表情就好
Forget smiling. Just try to look less spooky.
你们看起来像是《闪灵》的双胞胎 又多了一堆双胞胎
You look like the twins from The Shining had another bunch of twins.
对了 艾博曼先生 稍等
Oh, Mr. Abelman, hold on one second, okay?
布鲁斯 你能接手吗 让她们微笑就好