宋飞正传（1990）

太糟糕了，你不知道
Oh, this is bad. You don't know.
打完电♥话♥的连锁反应就要爆发了
The chain reaction of calls this is gonna set off.
纽约、长岛、佛罗里达 就像百慕大一样
New York, Long Island, Florida. It's like the Bermuda Triangle.
很遗憾 也没人曾经消失
Unfortunately, nobody ever disappears.
我舅舅告诉我婶婶 我婶婶再告诉我妈…
My uncle to my aunt, my aunt to my mother...
…我妈再到我舅
...my mother to my uncle.
我舅再到我表兄，从表兄到妹妹 从妹妹再到我
My uncle to my cousin, my cousin to my sister, my sister to me.
你应当今晚和他吃饭 把这个事处理一下
You should've just had dinner with him tonight and gotten it over with.
就是场电影嘛 - 就是场电影？
It's just a movie. - Just a movie?
你不懂
You don't understand.
这不是1到8号♥太空秘令
This isn't Plans 1-8 from Outer Space.
这是9号♥秘令
This is Plan 9.
这是奏效的那一个
This is the one that worked.
这是拍得最糟糕的电影
The worst movie ever made.
我很期待这部片子
I'm really looking forward to it.
我告诉你 如果我们要看电影…
I got news for you. If we're making this movie...
…我们就必须马上找张桌子
...we gotta get a table immediately.
别浪费时间了 给他塞些钱
Let's stop fooling around. Let's just slip him some money.
在中餐馆？ 他们会拿钱吗？
In a Chinese restaurant? Do they take money?
“他们会拿钱吗？” 每个人都会
" Do they take money?" Everyone takes money.
和我出去过的一个男的老这样做 你给他们20元
I went out with a guy who did it all the time. You slip them 20 bucks.
20元？
Twenty bucks?
是不是有点多了？
Isn't that excessive?
你要给他什么，零钱吗？
Well, what do you wanna give him, change?
比我们吃饭的钱还多
It's more than the meal.
那就咱们三个人都出点
Oh, come on, we'll divide it up three ways.
好的，7块，7块，6块
All right. Seven, seven, six.
我不会吃那么多的
I'm not gonna eat that much.
我会数你吃的虾
I'm counting your shrimps.
那谁去做这个事啊？
Okay, who's gonna do it?
不，我可做不了
Oh, no, I can't do it.
我对这些事不在行啊 我会弄得很狼狈的
I'm not good at these things. I get flustered.
一次我在溜冰场试图 贿赂一个引座员
Once I tried to bribe an usher at the Roller Derby.
差点被逮捕
I almost got arrested.
我想该是你了，杰瑞
I guess it's you, Jer.
我？你怎么不去啊？ - 我不能去做，这是男人的事
Me? What about you? - Oh, I can't do that. It's a guy thing.
看来在这个行贿世界里…
The women's movement just can't seem to make any progress...
…女权运动没任何的进展，不是吗？
...in the world of bribery, can they?
把钱给我
Give me the money.
咋样了？
How's it going?
非常忙啊
Very busy.
哎呀，我们急切地想坐啊
Boy, we are really anxious to sit down.
今晚的特色菜非常好
Very good specials tonight.
如果你能为我们找个空桌…
If there's anything you can do to get us a table...
…我们将不胜感激
...we'd really appreciate it.
噢，姓名？
Oh, what is your name?
不，不，我想现在就吃饭
No, no, I wanna eat now.
是啊，今晚是全鱼宴 非常新鲜
Yes, whole sea bass dinner tonight, very fresh.
收下这个，我现在快饿死了
Here. Take this. I'm starving.
拿着，拿着
Take it. Take it.
丹尼森，四位！
Dennison, four!
你们可以就餐了
Your table is ready.
不，不，我们想要那张桌子
No, no. I want that table.
我想要那张桌子
I want that table!
你看到了没？ 怎么回事啊？
Come on, did you see that? What was that?
他拿了我们的钱 他却不给我们安排座位
He took the money. He didn't give us a table.
20元打水漂了 - 他怎么能这样呢？
You lost the 20. - Well, how could he do that?
你没给他说清楚？ - 没给他说清楚？
You didn't make it clear. - Make it clear?
真是个令人遗憾的作秀啊
What a sorry exhibition that was.
我把钱要回来
All right, let me get the money back.
不好意思
Excuse me.
我知道这非常尴尬
I realize this is extremely embarrassing.
我朋友显然犯了个错误
My friend here apparently made a mistake.
姓名？
Your name?
宋飞 - 是，宋飞，四位
Seinfeld. - Yes, Seinfeld, four.
不，不，你见那边留长发的女孩了吗？
No, no. Do you see the girl over there with the long hair?
嗯，见了，见了
Oh, yes, yes.
美女啊，非常漂亮 你女朋友？
Very beautiful girl. Very beautiful. Your girlfriend?
实际上我们接触过一段时间 但是…
Well, actually, we did date for a while, but...
这个倒是无关紧要
That's really not relevant here.
恋情很麻烦啊
Relationships are difficult.
很难相处下去啊…
It is very hard to stay together...
好，你先听我说
All right, listen. All right.
还要等多久啊？
How much longer is it gonna be?
大约5到10分钟
Be about five, 1 0 minutes.
怎么样
So?
似乎有些分歧
There seems to be a bit of a discrepancy.
那么我们什么时候能吃饭啊？ - 5到10分钟
So when are we gonna eat? - Five, 1 0 minutes.
我给你说过要早些来
We should've left earlier. I told you.
看来是没法吃饭看电影了
I don't see any way we can eat and make this movie.
我必须要吃饭
Oh, well, I have to eat.
我们点外卖♥♥，在出租车上吃
Let's order it to go, We'll eat it in the cab.
在出租车上吃？ 在出租车上吃中餐？
Eat it in the cab? Chinese food in a cab?
我们在电影院吃 - 你要去哪里啊？
We'll eat it in the movie. - Where do you think you're going?
你还想着有个大的野餐桌在那？
You think they have big picnic tables there?
那你的意思是？ - 我说我们现在就走
Well, what do you suggest? - I say we leave now...
…我们去天空堡，两下吃完
...we go to Sky Burger, and we scarf them down.
我不去那个天空堡 而且它是在相反的方向
I'm not going to Sky Burger. Besides, it's in the opposite direction.
我们吃爆米花或其它的吧 - 凯特莱特？
Let's just eat popcorn or something. - Cartwright?
我不能把爆米花当晚饭吃
I can't have popcorn for dinner.
凯特莱特！ - 我得吃饭啊
Cartwright! - I have to eat.
那里有热狗啊
Well, they have hot dogs there.
电影院里的热狗？ 我宁愿去舔掉在地板上的食物
Oh, movie hot dogs? I'd rather lick the food off the floor.
我无论如何不能去了 我得等塔蒂安娜的电♥话♥
I can't go anyway. I have to wait here for Tatiana's call.
我去问问，打扰一下 我在等一个电♥话♥，克斯坦萨？
Let me just check. Excuse me, I'm expecting a call. Costanza?
嗯，刚才接了个电♥话♥
Yes. I just got a call.
我喊“卡特赖特？卡特赖特！” 就像这样
I yell, " Cartwright? Cartwright!" Just like that.
没人过来，我就挂了
Nobody came up. I hang up.
是不是找克斯坦萨或…？
Well, was it for Costanza or...?
是，是，就是 没人应答啊
Yes, yes, that's it. Nobody answered.
是个女的吗？
Was it a woman?
是，是
Yes, yes.
我告诉她你不在这里
I tell her you not here.
她骂了几句，我挂了电♥话♥
She said curse word. I hang up.
她打过电♥话♥了
She called.
他喊“卡特赖特”
He yelled, " Cartwright."
我错过她的电♥话♥了
I missed her.
谁是卡特赖特？
Who's Cartwright?
我是卡特赖特
I'm Cartwright.
你不是卡特赖特 - 我当然不是卡特赖特！
You're not Cartwright. - Of course I'm not Cartwright!
你们俩干脆自己去电影院 我心情不好
Why don't you two go to the movies by yourselves. I'm not in the mood.
我也是 我要去天空堡
Well, me either. I'm going to Sky Burger.
你们不去了啊？ - 你不需要我俩
So you're not going? - You don't need us.
这么糟糕的电影 我怎么能一个人去呢
Well, I can't go to a bad movie by myself.
我难道给那些陌生人 发表讽刺评论吗？
What, am I gonna make sarcastic remarks to strangers?
我还是去我舅舅家
I guess I'll just go to my uncle's.
我们应当告诉他我们要走吗？ - 凭啥？走就行了
Should we tell him we're leaving? - What for? Let's just get out of here.
宋飞，四位！
Seinfeld, four!
饥饿会让人做出惊人的事情
Hunger will make people do amazing things.
证据就是嗜食同类
I mean, the proof of that is cannibalism.
嗜食同类…？
Cannibalism. What...?
他们说啥了？我的意思是 他们在吃东西
What do they say? I mean, they're eating, you know.
“味道很好，这是谁？”
"This is good. Who is this?
“我喜欢这个人”
I like this person."
我的意思是…
You know, I mean...
我认为对食人者来说最难的事…
I would think the hardest thing about being a cannibal...
…是美美地睡一觉
...is trying to get some really deep sleep.
能明白我说的吧？ 就像：
You know what I mean? I would think you'd be like:
“那是啥？那儿是谁？”
"What was that? Who's there?
“谁啊？有人吗？”
Who's there? Is somebody there?