健身世界（2021）

You eat mustard packets for dinner. What do you know about healthy?
我们要去进行感谢身体的游泳
We're going for a body gratitude swim.
你想来吗
Would you like to come?
你知道你宁愿泡在酸水里
You know you'd rather bathe in acid.
好啊
Okay.
太好了
Great.
我曾对我的前任说 她作为一个瘾君子是幸运的
I used to tell my ex she was lucky she was a cokehead,
因为她可以戒断
'cause she could just stop.
而当令你成瘾的东西是食物时 情况就困难得多了
When your addiction is food, it's much tougher.
你必须和死敌交好
You have to make friends with the enemy.
和要你命的东西发展健康 持续的关系
Develop a healthy, ongoing relationship with the thing that's killing you.
但我不是来给任何人说教的
But I'm not here to lecture anyone.
说教倒计时 三 二…
Here comes a lecture, in three, two-- Three, two…
事实上 我从大家身上学到的东西 和我能教的一样多
The truth is that I have as much to learn from all of you as I do to teach.
自私自利 自以为是的废话
Self-serving, sanctimonious crap!
这话应该印在中学校长 办公桌上的咖啡杯上
Belongs on a coffee mug on a middle school principal's desk.
茜拉 该你了 感恩时间
Sheila, you're up. Gratitude time.
好 我今天醒来了
Okay. I woke up today.
这总是比醒不来要好
Always better than the alternative.
我两周来第一次见到女儿
I saw my daughter for the first time in two weeks.
她看起来长大了些
And she looked bigger.
不一样了
Different.
但这是不可能的 对吗
But she can't be, can she?
我是说她可能只是 因为离开妈妈而变成熟了
I mean she probably just matured being away from her mom.
你还有其他事要感恩吗 小事也可以
Anything else you're grateful for in there? It can be small.
被人指责是骗子如何 这算小事吗
What about getting called out for being full of shit? Is that small?
我想不到了
I can't think of anything.
试着不要去想 我发现我的嘴只靠它自己就挺好
Try not thinking. I find that my mouth can work just fine on its own.
有时甚至太好了
Sometimes all too well.
她和这里的所有人一样 满嘴谎言
Exactly as full of shit as everyone else here.
坐在一起 分享感受 剥橙子皮
Sitting around, sharing their feelings, peeling their oranges,
与此同时 文尼格林们正在占领市场
while the Vinnie Greens of the world take over.
我能看出来你还有其他想法
I can see something else going on in there.
有些你没说出口的东西 我对此很感兴趣
Something that you're not saying. I'm interested in that.
不 她不感兴趣
Oh, no, she isn't.
你曾隐瞒过 茜拉 我们知道
You've done the withholding thing, Sheila. We're all aware of that.
你这次能试试说出来吗
Can you try letting it out for a change?
你没有魔法 你看不到我内心的想法
You don't have magic powers. You don't see inside my soul.
你不睿智 你甚至不聪明 一点也不风趣
You're not wise, and you're not even clever. Definitely not funny.
你说的一切都听起来像是 来自汽车保险杠贴纸
Everything you say sounds like you read it off of a bumper sticker
旅馆礼品店里的那种
at a motel gift shop.
你表现得像达♥赖♥喇♥嘛♥
You act like you're the Dalai Lama,
但你其实是孤独 曾经很胖的女同性恋
when really what you are is a lonely, formerly-fat lesbian
总是穿蓝绿的衣服 让人无法认真对待
wearing way too much turquoise to ever take seriously.
-说完了吗 -没有
-Is that all? -No.
这是顶嘴 她应该动动腿
This is back talk. She should take a walk.
闭嘴 梅琳达 你这个幼稚鬼 你太渴望去讨好别人
Shut up, Melinda. You fucking child! You're so goddamn eager to please.
你甚至无法专注于自己的康复 非得求房♥间里的每一个成年人
You can't even focus on your own recovery without begging every grown-up in the room
拍拍你的头才行
to pat you on your fucking head!
还有你 你装出 一副坚强女性解放者的模样
And you, you act like this tough women's libber,
但其实你讨厌我
but the truth is you hate me
就因为我比你漂亮 比你成功
for the crime of being prettier and more successful than you.
你在现实世界里没有自己的生活
You have no life out there in the real world.
这就是你的夏令营
This is your summer camp,
只有在这里才会有人把你当回事
the only place where anyone thinks you're anybody.
好了 茜拉
Okay, Sheila.
我看到所谓康复真正的样子
When I see what recovery really looks like,
我宁愿回到洗手间的地板上 抱着该死的马桶
I'd rather be back on the bathroom floor with my arms around the fucking toilet.
-你成功了 完成 走吧 -茜拉 等等
-You did it. It's done. Now go. -Sheila, wait.
你疯了吗 她们现在讨厌你了 你是讨厌的人 走啊
Are you crazy? They hate you now. You are hated. Go!
你知道患上这种特定的心理疾病 有什么好处吗
You know what's cool about having this particular mental illness?
任何人对你说的任何话 无论多么恶毒
There's nothing anyone can say to you, no matter how vile,
你都已经对自己说过了
that you haven't already said to yourself.
这话我可能是在某个保险杠贴纸上看到的
I might have read that on a bumper sticker somewhere.
谢谢你终于参与了进来
Thank you for finally showing up.
欢迎来康复 这里很糟糕
Welcome to recovery. It sucks here.
好吧 我明白 我一直很混♥蛋♥
Okay, I get it. I've been a jerk.
我一直对你很凶 你生气也情有可原
I've been tough on you, and it makes sense that you're angry.
你完全有理由生气 我活该
You have every right to be. I deserve it.
也许没有我随时在你脑子里念叨 你会过得更好
Maybe you'd be better off without me in your ear all the time.
也许你会因此变得更开心 更健康
Maybe you'd be happier and healthier for it.
不要美化身体 画出曲线来 画出你们所看到的
Don't idealize the body. Draw the curves. Draw what you see.
我对你太苛刻了
I've been way too harsh on you.
我那样说你的身体 是很刻薄的 而且很不公平
The way I spoke about your body, that was mean. And totally unfair.
但也不全是坏事 我确实激励了你几次 不是吗
But it hasn't been all bad. I did motivate you at times, didn't I?
录像带 健身课 如果没有我
The video. The classes. Would you have gone there,
你会去做 去推自己一把吗 平心而论
pushed yourself, without me? Can you honestly say that?
没有我的话 你觉得你会变成谁
Who do you think you'll become without me?
你人生中的一切美好事物都是因为…
Everything good in your life is because of--
对于那些浪费 我真的非常伤心
I'm really, just so sad about the waste.
浪费我的时间 尤其是觉得自己那么糟糕
Wasting of my time. Feeling shitty about, of all things, myself.
比如我本可以用那些时间和精力去…
Like, I could have used that time and energy to--
我也不知道 去交朋友 去做出改变
I don't know. Make friends. Make a difference.
创造任何东西 真的 做任何别的事
Make anything, really, truly, do anything else.
比如我本可以学一个乐器 或是该死的意大利语
Like, I could have learned an instrument. Or fucking Italian.
或是日语什么的 无所谓了
Or, you know, Japanese or something. I don't know.
也许日语就算了 太难了 但是本来是有可能的
Maybe not Japanese. That's very hard. But I could have.
我的事业到今天本来可以发展成什么样
I mean, where I could be with my business today,
要是我投入一半的时间和精力去…
if only-- if I'd devoted, like, half of that time and energy to--
我知道说这些话没什么用
And I know that it's not productive to talk like this,
但我就是…你们知道 我感觉很悲伤
but I just-- you know, I feel sad.
我说了那么多谎言 造成了那么多伤害 还有…你们懂吗
And like all the lies I've told and the harm I've done, and-- You know?
我想让自己的生活好起来
And I wanna pick up the pieces of my life.
但我担心现在太迟了
But I just-- I'm worried that it's too late.
听着 我不会假装你们康复之后
Look, I'm not here to pretend like it's all unicorns and rainbows
一切都是积极向上的
on the other side of recovery.
但是…
But…
我说了“但是”吗
Did I say there was a "but"?
我觉得你有暗示
Well, I felt like you implied it.
说说看我暗示什么了
And tell me what I implied.
现在还不算太迟
That it's not too late.
你说是就是吧
If you say so.
我以为
I think I was under the impression
这会是以夫妻为重心的咨♥询♥
this would be more of a couple-centric appointment.
抱歉 让你失望了 丹尼
Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, Danny.
但这次咨♥询♥旨在揭开恢复过程的面纱
But this session is designed to pull back the curtain on the recovery process
这样做可以让爱人了解孤独 孤立
and in so doing, let in loved ones to the lonely, isolating
并且极为隐秘的
and deeply secretive experience
和成瘾 强迫行为斗争的经历
of battling addictive and compulsive behaviors.
如果是这样
Well, if that's the case,
你有给她的情人发一份请柬吗
were you able to get an invitation out to her lover?
-拜托 请别这样 -她提过这件事吗
-Oh, please don't do this. Please. -Did she mention that?
她有没有提过 她和一位摩♥门♥教♥的商场开♥发♥商上♥床♥
Did she mention that she's fucking a Mormon shopping mall developer?
我很确定他可能就是恶魔
Who I'm pretty sure might be the devil.
-我跟你说了 已经结束了 -你什么都没说
-I told you it was over. -You told me nothing.
你对我说的全部都是谎言
You told me nothing but lies.
你很生气 这合情合理
You're angry. That makes sense.
但目前呢 我要请大家保持…
But, for now, I'm gonna ask that we keep our--
我在这里是想努力改变
I'm trying to change. That's what I'm doing here.
我想努力变好 我确实在变好
I'm trying to get better, and I am getting better.
我承认我所有的错误
I'm owning up to my shit. All of it.
令你感到生气的那些事
And all of the things that you're angry about…
是我做的 全都是
I did them, all of them.
但它们不是无关的
But they're not separate.
-是有关联的 所有的努力… -我懂…
-It's connected. All of the work-- -I got it. I got it.
你要说“我的外遇是一种症状”
This is gonna be one of those "my affair was a symptom" thing.
-不是的 -搞外遇的人不是你
-No. -You didn't do it.
-而是你的病症 对吗 -我没这么说
-The disease did, right? -That's not what I'm saying.
-我根本就不是这个意思 -是 我不在乎
-That's not what I'm saying at all. -Yeah, I don't care.
我受够了 不想再支持你了
I'm done being in your cheering section.
反正看起来你已经在这里 得到了足够的支持 所以…