爱你，维克托

and they sat there for what felt like six years,
然后我爸爸说
and my-my dad said,
"我特别高兴你终于告诉我们了"
"I'm really happy you finally told us."
等等 他们很高兴你"终于"告诉他们了
Wait. They were glad that you "finally" told them?
好吧 似乎我妈妈在我十二岁时
Okay, so apparently, my mom had discovered
发现了我的网页搜索记录
my internet search history when I was twelve,
看到我在谷歌♥"汤姆·赫兰德"和"鸡鸡"
and saw that I had been Googling "Tom Holland" plus "penis."
不是吧
No!
-居然是荷兰弟 -是啊
- Tom Holland? - I know.
不管怎样 谢谢你
Anyway, thank you.
帮助我鼓起勇气
For helping me be brave.
不 拉希姆 这都是你一个人做到的
No. Rahim, you did that all on your own.
我真的很为你骄傲
I'm... I'm really proud of you.
你是有什么事吗
Is something going on?
没有 抱歉
No. Sorry.
维克托
Victor?
爸爸
Dad?
维克托 你为什么没在学校
Victor, why aren't you in school?
这是我的错 萨拉扎先生
That, that would be my fault, Mr. Salazar.
我今天没办法上学
I had to miss school today
要参加穆♥斯♥林♥的一千颗开心果节
for the Muslim Festival of a Thousand Pistachios.
非常神圣
Very sacred.
维克托正好现在没课
Uh, Victor had a free period,
就特别好心地帮我把作业带过来
and he was kind enough to bring me my homework
这样我就不会落下功课了
so I wouldn't fall behind.
对了 我叫拉希姆
I'm Rahim, by the way.
抱歉 维克托 这是我朋友谢尔比
Oh, uh, sorry. Uh, Victor, this is, uh, my friend Shelby.
很高兴见到你 维克托
So nice to meet you, Victor.
你♥爸♥爸总是说起你的事
Your dad talks about you all the time.
是吗 什么时候
He does? When?
在同性恋亲友会上
PFLAG.
我和谢尔比是在集♥会♥上认识的
Shelby and I, we know each other from the meetings.
维克托 咱们能单独聊两句吗
Uh, Victor, can we talk for a second?
节日快乐 我太爱开心果了
Happy holidays. I just love pistachios.
-你这是在约会吗 -谢尔比和我...
- Are you on a date right now? - Shelby and I...
没错 我们是在约会
Yes, we're seeing each other.
才刚刚开始 所以我还没告诉你
It's very new. It's too new to tell you about,
不过事已至此了
but here we are.
-妈妈知道吗 -她知道
- Does Mom know? - She does.
所以就这样了吗
So, that's it?
你们两个永远都不会复合了
You guys are never getting back together?
你对她不抱任何希望了吗
You're just giving up on her?
维克托 我没有不抱希望
Victor, I'm not giving up on anything.
你在跟别人约会 都没有尝试的意思了
You're dating other people. You're not even trying anymore.
听着 我觉得这个话题非常严肃
Look, I think that this is a much bigger conversation.
可能我抓到你逃学
And maybe me catching you skipping school
并不是最合适的讨论时机
is not the best time to have it.
你那个朋友很会打圆场
Your friend over there, he's pretty smooth,
但我可不是三岁小孩
but I wasn't born yesterday.
你要告诉妈妈吗
Are you gonna tell Mom?
如果你现在回学校上课 我可能就不提了
If you head back to class now, maybe I'll forget to mention it.
我真不敢相信我爸爸找了个女朋友
I can't believe my dad got a girlfriend.
天啊 他怎么能这样对我妈妈
God. How could he do this to my mom?
我能问你一个私人问题吗
Can I ask you a personal question?
你觉得你父母应该复合吗
Do you think your parents should get back together?
我是说 你觉得他们适合彼此吗
Like, do you think that they're right for each other?
我不知道 去年他们总是争吵个不停
I don't know. I mean, last year, they were constantly fighting.
有时候我只希望
And sometimes I just wished
他们能赶紧分开 让大家都喘口气
they'd get the hell away from each other and give us all a break.
在那之前...
Before that...
他们一直都挺般配的
They were pretty magic together.
他们在我们这么大的时候就开始约会了
I mean, they were our age when they started dating.
可能这也是问题的部分症结所在
But maybe that's part of the problem. You know, like...
你的第一个约会对象就是你厮守到老的人
what are the odds that the first person you date is the person
这概率能有多大呢
you're supposed to end up with?
好吧 我不管你♥爸♥爸怎么说
Okay, I don't care what your dad says.
我们才不要回学校
We're not going back to school.
是时候做一场极致的个人护理了
It's time to turn the self-care up to an eleven.
知道吗 我还从没修过脚呢
You know, I've never actually had a pedicure before.
这又不是什么新鲜事
You're acting like this is news,
但要知道脚丫子可粗糙了
but those hooves are rough.
琳达 米歇尔 请用四号♥特别款
Linda, Michelle, the number 4 special, please.
我要"噢噢茄紫色"
"Oh oh aubergine" for me,
给我非常狂野的朋友涂透明色就好
and "Clear" for my very wild friend over here.
好吧
Okay.
你为什么一直那样对着手♥机♥傻笑
Okay, why do you keep grinning at your phone like that?
-是荷兰弟回你私信了吗 -没有
- Did Tom Holland slide into your DMs? - No!
好吧 是个叫查理的男生
Okay? It's just this guy Charlie
我一直跟他在某个交友软件上聊天
I've been talking to on one of those apps.
-你知道是哪个 -让我看看啊
- You know which one. - Well, let me see.
等等 这些无头猛♥男♥都在亚特兰大吗
Wait. Are all these headless torsos in Atlanta?
这只是附近的人
This is just guys nearby.
其实网络的海洋里还是有很多同志小鱼的
Turns out there's a ton of gay fish in the online sea.
这些鱼都声称自己有23公分大屌♥
And all the fish claim to have 9 inch dicks.
是啊 这些鱼都会说谎的
Yeah, all the fish kind of lie.
我和查理刚开始聊天的时候
Like when Charlie and I started talking,
我们都说自己22岁
we both said we were twenty two.
结果他在萨德维克学院读十二年级
But turns out he's a senior at Thadwick Academy.
萨德维克
Thadwick?
我去 你男朋友可真壕
Damn. Your boyfriend's bougie.
他不是我男朋友 好吗
He's not my boyfriend, okay?
我们都没见过面
We-we haven't even met.
我们只是经常发消息
We just text a lot.
偶尔发些稍微有点羞耻的照片
And send the occasional mildly scandalous pic.
你应该问问他想不想见面
You should ask him if he wants to meet up.
现在吗
What, like now?
你说我可以选择今天的安排
You said I get to pick what we do today,
这就是我的选择
and this is what I pick.
不敢相信我居然真要这么做了
I can't believe I'm actually gonna do this.
我感觉下巴上起了个痘痘
I feel a pimple starting on my chin,
而且这一身都算不上是我最好看的装扮
and this isn't even one of my top-tier outfits.
还好你走运 我们在一家水疗馆
Well, lucky for you, we're in a spa.
琳达 米歇尔 给他做全套护理
Linda, Michelle, give him the works.
我钱包里只有17块
I have $17 in my wallet.
-那就给他弄17块的 -这就对了
- Give him $17 worth of works. - There we go.
你确定我来这里没问题吗
Okay, you sure you don't mind being here?
没事 本吉今天不上班
No. Benji's not working today.
而且 我知道防狼喷雾放在了哪里
And plus, I know where we keep the pepper spray
以防查理是个60岁的杀人犯
in case Charlie turns out to be a sixtyeard murderer
性癖是用美工刀斩首高中学生
whose kink is decapitating high school students with a box cutter.
你以为只有你看真实犯罪剧吗
Do you think you're the only person that watches true crime?
我的天 那应该就是他
Oh, my God. I think that's him.
好吧 我完全愿意被他斩首
Okay, I would so let him decapitate me.
-还是先别这么想吧 -也对
- Maybe don't start with that. - Right.
去吧
Go.
查理 你好呀
Charlie. Hiee!
我不知道我为什么要那样说话 我很紧张
I don't know why I just said "Hi" like that. I'm nervous.
-没事 很高兴见到你 -嗯
- It's fine. Nice to meet you. - Yeah.
你长得跟照片上一样 谢天谢地
You look just like your pics, thank God.
很多人会用那种环形灯打光
A lot of people use those ring
让自己脸上的毛孔消失
light things that make their pores disappear,
结果现实生活中长得跟癞蛤♥蟆♥一样
and they end up looking like hideous monsters in real life,
但你不是 你根本不需要护肤啦 姐妹
but you don't. So, drop that skincare routine, sis!
谢谢 谢谢你
Thanks. Thank you.
这里什么好喝
What's good here?
辣椒香摩卡是我个人的最爱
Ah, well, the chili mocha latte is my personal obsesh.
它火♥辣♥甜蜜
She's serving spicy, she's serving sweet.
你的生活里少不了它
You need her in your life.
它是指咖啡吗
"Her" As in the, the coffee?
你去点单吧 我找桌子
Uh, why don't you order, and I'll grab us a table?
抱歉