爱你，维克托

-您的咖啡好了 -谢谢
- Here you go. - Thank you.
抱歉我迟到了
Sorry I'm late.
我又梦到扮演雷神的锤哥和他弟一起
I had that dream again where the Hemsworth brothers
手把手教我冲浪
teach me how to surf.
我仍抱有幻想 这有一天会实现
Still holding out hope that it's a premonition.
算你走运
Well, lucky for you,
唯独今天你可以迟到
today's the only day you're allowed to be late.
生日快乐
Happy birthday.
我很高兴你睡懒觉了
And I'm glad you slept in,
因为今晚你可得有足够精神
'cause I can't have you tired for tonight.
我有盛大的安排
I have big plans for us.
是吗 什么样的安排
Oh, yeah? What kind of plans?
这么说吧 我从我妈的酒柜里
Uh, let's just say I may have "borrowed"
"借"了一瓶香槟
a bottle of champagne from my mom's wine cabinet.
我们喝点小酒 再亲热一下
A little bit of drinking, a little bit of fooling around.
我就计划了这些
And that's all I have planned.
我是不是该更用心点安排
Should I have tried a little bit harder?
不 这就很完美了
No. No, that's perfect.
我爸妈今晚硬拉我去吃浮夸晚餐
My parents should be out cold after this
吃完后他们应该就昏睡了
bougie dinner they're dragging me to.
肯定没那么糟啦
I'm sure it won't be that bad.
你没听过我妈用蹩脚的法国口音读"炖菜"
You haven't heard my mom try and impress a French waiter
试图在法国服务员面前装逼
with her pronunciation of ratatouille.
糟了 我不小心把她召唤出来了
Oh, wow. I accidentally summoned her.
小伙子们
Hi, boys.
我以前说过了 我要再说一遍
Said it before and I'll say it again,
你的小脸蛋是全溪木镇最软嫩的
the softest cheeks in Creekwood.
你能相信吗 这家伙没等他妈妈
Can you believe this sneaky cat left the house
祝他生日快乐 就偷偷摸摸出门了
without letting his own mother wish him a happy birthday?
生日快乐 亲爱的
Happy birthday, darling.
这是佳客法式咖啡馆的巧克力可颂
It's a pain au chocolat from Café Jacquot.
这礼物真怪 毕竟我就在卖♥♥糕点的店工作
Odd gift, considering I'm surrounded by pastries all day.
但很贴心 谢谢妈妈
But it's very sweet. Thank you, Mom.
本吉 在我走之前
Oh, Benji, before I go,
你能不能帮我做一杯美味的燕麦奶拿铁
could you make me one of those delicious oat milk lattes?
没问题 妈妈
Sure, Mother.
好了 安全了
Okay. The coast is clear.
本吉一定跟你提过
I'm sure Benji mentioned that
我们今晚要带他去闪耀法国餐厅
we're taking him to Chez Luisant tonight.
我希望你也可以来
Well, I was hoping that you could join us.
作为给他的有趣惊喜
As a fun surprise for him.
没问题 那就太好了
Yeah! Yeah, of course. That'd be great.
好极了 你最好穿漂亮点
Oh, wonderful. You may want to dress up a bit.
不过别担心 不到华丽 比较像是
But don't worry, it isn't, um, hoity‐toity. It's more, um,
舒适时髦风
cozy chic.
那杯拿铁我还是不要了
Mmm. Oh, I'm gonna take a rain check on the latte.
我刚喝的抹茶开始起效了
My, uh, my matcha's just kicked in
我现在有点兴奋
and I'm feeling a little buzzy.
我等不及晚点和你庆祝了
I can't wait to celebrate you later.
-再见 维克托 -再见
- Bye, Victor.- Bye.
我妈刚刚是不是冲你眨眼了
Did my mom just wink at you?
就该这样向
That's how you pay your respects
"全溪木镇最软嫩的小脸蛋[屁♥股♥蛋]"致意
to "the softest cheeks in Creekwood."
-最软嫩吗 我摸摸看 -过来
‐ Softest, huh? Let me see. ‐ Hey! Come here.
爱你 维克托
第二季 第七集
这感觉很好
This is nice.
是啊 还不错
Yeah, it's fine.
只有我觉得我们的女监护人很情绪化吗
Is it me or does it feel like we have a very emotional chaperone?
别烦她了
Give her a break.
菲利克斯还是不肯理她 她心情糟透了
Felix still won't talk to her. She's a mess.
她连高跟鞋都没心情穿了
I mean, she's not even wearing heels.
她的格言通常是"给我7厘米 不然我死了算了"
Her motto is usually "give me three inches or give me death."
那菲利克斯的长度勉强达标
So Felix just barely made the cut.
好了 安德鲁
Okay. Andrew...
如果米娅不小心害你妈
If Mia accidentally got your mom
被收治留院72小时
committed to a 72‐hour psych hold,
以下哪个惊喜约会 能让你原谅她
which of these surprise dates would make you forgive her:
去吉米·卡特总统图书馆
a visit to the Jimmy Carter Presidential Library,
去木偶艺术中心 诚实回答我
or a visit to the Center for Puppetry Arts. Be honest.
真有这些地方吗
These are real places?
天啊 亚特兰大烂透了
God, Atlanta sucks.
这不是开玩笑的
Guys, this is serious.
我必须想出个绝佳点子
I‐I really have to think of something amazing
来提醒菲利克斯我有多爱他
to remind Felix how much I love him!
蕾可 深呼吸
Lake. Breathe.
我会帮你想到完美的地点 好吗
I'll help you find the perfect thing. Okay?
谢谢你
Thank you.
好了 现在我要给我们点中餐外卖♥♥
Okay. Now I'm gonna go order us a bunch of Chinese takeout,
就像电影里的律师们
like they do in movies where the lawyers
必须通宵破案时所做的那样 好吗
have to stay up all night cracking the case. Okay?
我们本来不是打算点披萨吗
I thought we were gonna order pizza.
我知道 但我现在必须陪着蕾可
I know. I just need to be here for Lake, is all.
听着 如果我们结束得早
Look, if we finish early,
可以回我卧室里再舒舒服服地点披萨
we can order pizza from the comfort of my bedroom.
你们忍♥一下行吗
Oh, uh, can you hold on for a second?
两位
Guys. Guys!
忙完了你们再亲热 好吗
Smash on your own time, okay?
别人的恋情命悬一线啊
A relationship hangs in the balance.
被自己的爱人背叛
Betrayed by my lover.
他们带走了我妈 我还能走出来吗
They took away my mother. Will I ever recover?
菲利克斯
Uh, hey, Felix.
你多久没洗澡了
When was the last time you took a shower?
是啊 你让我后悔长了鼻子
Yeah, you're really making me regret having a nose.
我的鼻子可是我第二最爱的身体部位
My nose is my second favorite body part.
你们当然想知道了
Wouldn't you like to know?
好吧 我去洗
All right. I'll go.
你们今晚能看着他吗
Hey, would you guys be able to keep an eye on him tonight?
本吉的妈妈邀请我去闪耀法国餐厅为他庆生
Benji's mom invited me to Chez Luisant for his birthday.
我听说詹妮弗·洛佩兹在拍新电影期间每晚都去吃
I heard J. Lo ate there every night while she was staying here
就是那部讲一个斗志旺盛的妈妈
filming that new movie about being a scrappy mom
找到真爱的电影
finding true love.
她不是已经演过这样的电影了吗
Hasn't she already made that movie?
是啊 每部复仇者电影也是各不相同的呢
Oh, and every Avengers movie is uniquely different.
你不是真打算穿这件去吧
You're not actually gonna wear that, are you?
是啊 本吉的妈妈说"舒适混搭时髦风"
Uh, yeah. Benji's mom said it's "cozy meets chic."
你确定你是同志吗 我放弃了
Are you sure you're gay? I‐‐ I wash my hands of this.
别理她 我帮你找衣服
Okay, don't‐‐ don't mind her. We'll find you something to wear.
找一件干净又大方的
Something clean and classic.
比如...
You know‐‐
你真的很喜欢毫无特点的运动T恤
Okay, wow. You, you really love the non‐descript athletic tee.
我应该可以借一件我爸的衬衫
Uh, well I could probably borrow one of my dad's button‐ups.
他比我高大一点
Uh, you know, he, he's a little bit bigger than I am,
-但我可以扎起来 -我们应该是穿一个码数的
- but I could tuck it in. ‐ We're probably the same size, right?
不不 没事 真的
Oh, no, no, no. It's, it's okay. Really‐‐
不用了
It's fine.
这是上季的圣罗兰[奢侈品牌]And it's, uh, it's last season St. Laurent, so...
小心别溅脏了
try not to spill anything on it.
你也小心别溅脏了这一件
Well, uh, try not to spill anything on this, either,
因为这可是今日老海军[平价休闲品牌]because it is present day Old Navy.
很可爱
Cute.
总之...嗯
Just... yeah.
好吧
All right.
我去 维克托 你好帅啊
Oh, damn, Victor! Lookin' good.
这是我第一次也是最后一次对着我哥鸡叫
That will be the first and last time I ever catcall my brother.
说一声 厨房♥里有小吃
Hey, guys, there's snacks in the kitchen.
拉希姆 低碳水的 我懂你
Rahim, Keto friendly. I got you.
瞧你多帅啊
Mira que handsome.
等一下 你的领子歪了
Hold on. Your collar is all crooked.
好了
There.
你猜我今晚要去哪儿
So guess where I'm going tonight.
我第一场同性恋亲友会
My first PFLAG meeting.