小丑梦摇篮（2016）

我正在重塑自己
I'm kind of rebranding myself a little bit.
我在创造一个角色 小丑角色
I'm working on a character, a clowning character.
给小丑取个名字叫笨笨怎么样
What about Clumso for a name for a clown?
我确实有男朋友啊
I do have a boyfriend.
-实际上还有两个 -一个是来自西班牙
- I have two, actually. - One is a shepherd
巴斯克区的牧羊人
from the Basque region of Spain.
另一个是通过无线电认识的全国到处跑的卡车司机
The other is a cross-country trucker I met on my CB radio.
我要离开这破镇子
I'm leaving this godforsaken town!
我再也不回来了
And I'm never coming back!
克莉丝汀 我无法解释我的行为
Christine, I can't explain my actions.
回家吧 肯
Just go home, Ken.
好的 谢谢您的耐心等待
Okay, thanks for your patience.
所有乘坐飞往丹佛的863号♥航♥班♥的乘客请登机
Now boarding all rows for Flight 863 to Denver.
所有飞往丹佛的乘客请登机
All rows for Denver.
妈 开心点 你不是很喜欢买♥♥圣诞树吗
Mom, just cheer up; you love Christmas tree shopping.
我都不知道为什么要来
I don't even know why we're here.
你外婆走了 戴尔不知道跑哪去了
Meemaw's gone, and God knows where Dale is,
-肯也回丹佛了 -这毕竟是咱家的传统
- and Ken's in Denver. - Well, it's our tradition.
瞧瞧这些树 都是别人挑剩下的
Well, look at these things; they're all picked over.
它们都不对称
They're lopsided.
树叶好扎人
Oh! Needles!
天呐 奇普
Oh, God, Chip.
你看那棵树 是不是很像肯
Oh. Look at that tree. Doesn't it look like Ken?
斯多葛学派风
So stoic.
老天啊
Oh, man.
-我有个想法 奇普 -什么
- I've got an idea, Chip. - What?
咱们去好市多买♥♥棵盒装树吧
Let's go to Costco and get a tree in a box.
-假树吗 -今年只能这样
- A fake tree? - It makes sense this year.
-我不想去好市多 -谢了 先生
- I don't want to go to Costco. - Thank you, sir,
但我们不买♥♥这些蹩脚货
but we don't want any of these dogs.
祝你早日"摆脱"它们
Good luck getting rid of them.
好吧 我可以叫辆救护车过去
Okay, well, I can get an ambulance out there
-只要你把英里标记告诉我 -你好 玛莎
- if you want to give me your mile marker. - Hey, Martha.
我们现在是买♥♥假树的人了
So we're fake tree people now.
请稍等一下
Oh. Hold on a second.
所以我们才来这 还有一个原因是
That's why we're here. We're also here because Mom's
老妈和肯闹了不愉快 想和闺蜜聊聊心里话
having some sadness with K-E-N and could use some girl talk.
老天 可以吗
Boy, could I.
你的铃♥声♥一直都这么吵吗 玛莎
Is your ringer always that loud, Martha?
我的一位客户正困在路边上呢
One of my clients is stranded on the side of the road,
所以我可能需要...
so I might need to get...
你在干什...
Um, what are you...?
♪ 祝你生日快乐 ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
看吧 这下好多了
There, that's better.
-我一直很喜欢这首歌♥ -♪ 祝你生日快乐 ♪
- I've always loved that song. - ♪ Happy birthday ♪
-♪ 亲爱的玛莎 ♪ -玛莎
- ♪ Dear Martha ♪ - Martha?
特洛伊
Troy?
-特洛伊 -老天爷啊
- Um, Troy? - Oh, for God's sakes,
这才是玛莎
this is Martha!
我是玛莎
I'm Martha.
这里
Down here.
我们还要再唱一遍吗
Do we have to do the song again?
-不 没事 我听到了 -那敢情好
- No, that's okay. I heard it. - Cool.
-今天是你的生日吗 玛莎 -不是
- Is today your birthday, Martha? - No.
其实是圣诞节后一天
Um, it's actually the day after Christmas.
今年还挺重要的... 五十岁
And it is a big one... the old 5-0.
-不会吧 -五十 这么惨
- No. - 50? That's awful.
好... 谢谢 特洛伊
Oh, well... Thanks, Troy.
其实没关系 巴斯克兹夫人
It's actually okay, Mrs. Baskets.
我还是小姑娘的时候就
I've been dreaming about being in my 50s
梦想变成五十岁的样子了
since I was a little girl.
这是... 这就是你的派对吗
So, was that... that was your party?
不是 我今年不太想开派对
Uh, no. I don't really want to have a party this year.
只想窝在家里看影碟
I think I'm just gonna curl up at home with some DVDs.
看碟 那牧羊人怎么办
DVDs! What about the shepherd?
什么 你怎么知道他
What? How do you know about him?
我有线人
I've got my sources.
我跟她说的
I told her.
她是我老妈 我啥都跟她说
She's my mom; I tell her everything.
牧羊人那天晚上会在
Um, the shepherd is actually gonna be working
他家的巴斯克餐厅里上班
in his family's Basque restaurant that night,
我完全不介意
which is totally fine.
这是五十大寿
It's your 50th.
那可是半个世纪
That's half a century, you know.
你还能生孩子呢 别忘了
You could still have a baby, remember that.
有一个非洲女人六十四岁还生了孩子
A woman in Africa had a child at 6♥4♥.
我可能不会那么做
Um, I don't think I'm gonna do that.
你又说不准
You don't know.
我最近一直在训练自己的同理心
I've been trying to practice my empathy lately,
我的同理心告诉我 咱们应该给玛莎
and my empathy tells me that we should throw a party
办个派对 不然她有可能会自杀
for Martha, or she's gonna try to kill herself.
这主意不错 奇普
Well, that's a good idea, Chip.
-我是说开派对 -当然 还有 这是个...
- I mean, for the party. - Yeah. Plus, it's a, uh...
让迪尔·皮克斯[腌黄瓜]出道的好机会
great opportunity for me to debut Dill Pickles.
那是谁
Who's that?
他是我跟你说过的角色啊
He's my character that I told you about.
我一直在研究和练习...
You know, I've been researching, practicing...
对 为什么不叫黄油面包片蘸腌黄瓜
Oh. Why not Bread and Butter Pickles?
很好吃的 你没尝过吗
They're so tasty. Have you ever had 'em?
这不是重点 妈
That's not really the point, Mom.
听着 我们应该给我找个会场
Listen, I think we should find me a venue.
我是说 你懂的 给玛莎开派对的地方
I mean, and, you know, a place for Martha's birthday party.
她男朋友那晚要上班
Well, her boyfriend's working that night.
就选那个餐厅怎么样
What about the restaurant?
当你想到去贝克斯菲尔德吃晚餐
Now, when you think about dinner in Bakersfield,
你就得想到巴斯克餐厅
you got to think about Basque restaurants.
我好像雇过一次巴斯克水管工
You know, I think I used a Basque plumber once.
-还是萨尔瓦多人呢 -大家都赶来
- Or was he El Salvadorian? - Everybody comes,
从亚利桑那州...
from Arizona...
不过菜品看着好难吃
Oh, the food looks terrible, though.
纽约一定要尝尝本店的腌渍牛舌
New York just to have our pickled beef tongue.
好吧
Okay.
牛舌 呕
Beef tongue? Ugh.
如果这能让玛莎和牧羊人共度良宵
Well, if it'll get Martha a night with the shepherd,
还是值了
it's worth it.
我知道了 咱们给她办个惊喜派对吧
Oh. I know. Let's do a surprise party for her.
我喜欢看人们惊喜的样子
I love when I see people get surprised.
这点我不确定 没准会吓坏她
I don't know about that. That might freak her out.
那就更好了 我还知道她喜欢什么
Even better. And I know just what to get her.
我要亲手拼个东西
I'm gonna make something from scratch.
-这就是整棵树吗 -不 妈 还有...
- Is that the whole tree? - No, Mom, there's...
还有更多树 有七英尺高...
there's a lot more tree. It's seven feet...
那就太... 就是这样
That would be terr... Oh. There it is.
没错 是七英尺高
Yeah, it's seven feet tall.
七英尺高 那么小的盒吗
Seven feet tall! In that box?
正在计算里程
Calculating.
喂
Hello?
布鲁克斯先生
Mr. Brooks?
谁 是谁
Who? Who?
我是克莉丝汀·巴斯克兹 圣诞节快乐
Christine Baskets. Merry Christmas.
千万要保密
Hey, don't say anything,
假装你是在跟律师说话
but just pretend you're talking to your lawyer,
-或是你的足科医生 -好
- or-or your foot doctor. - Okay.
好 行吧
Okay. All right.
我一直觉得自己能当个优秀的足科医生
I always thought I could be a good foot doctor. Anyway,
总而言之 我们要在巴斯克餐厅给玛莎
listen, we're having a surprise birthday party for Martha.
开个惊喜派对
At the Basque restaurant.
巴... 巴斯克餐厅
Ba... A Basque restaurant?
好吧
Okay.
没错 四点钟 很激动吧