情牵你我她（2016）

You Me Her S02E06

Part 4 March 30, 2021, 11:43 a.m.

Because they may be old, but they're gonna notice
因为他们可能老了但是他们还是能发现
if there's a chick sleeping where Jack's supposed to be.
有个小妞会睡在杰克以前睡的地方
I tried to go upstairs. I really did.
我试过上楼我真的试过
But your situation is so...
但是你的情况太...
compelling and fucked up,
引人注目以及一团糟了
that I physically couldn't stay away.
以至于我本能地不能走开
You need to call your husband, Mrs. Trakarsky,
你要打电♥话♥给你老公塔卡’基太太
and you need to tell him to get his ass back to your house
你需要告诉他赶快滚回你家
so he can help you hoodwink your hyper-conservative parents.
然后帮你瞒住你超保守的父母
And then you need to get this sex fairy
然后你需要花几天的时间
the fuck out of Dodge for a few days.
隐瞒这个性♥爱♥童话
Okay, there is no version of this universe
问题是天地洪荒我压根不可能
in which I call Jack and ask for his help.
给J杰克打电♥话♥让他来帮我
No fucking way. Okay, fine.
他妈的绝不可能那好吧
Then Dave will just go get him. Yeah.
那戴夫就去吧他找来好啊
Then I will just have to go... wh... what?
那就只能我去... 啊... 什么?
Don't make me get the fly swatter, up.
别让我去拿苍蝇拍打你上楼
Honey...
亲爱的...
Why would you get... ?
你为什么会... ?
You know what, I don't even want to know,
这么说吧我根本不想知道
cause there is no room in here.
因为我已经自顾不暇了
All right.
好吧
So...
所以...
This is what we've got to work with.
这就是我们要去解决的问题
This is what we have to work with, yes.
这是我们要去解决的没错
You guys are not helping. What's the venue?
你们还没开始帮我是什么情况?
It's an Italian place she picked out.
她选了一个意式餐厅
It's called, uh, "Ask For Luigi"?
叫做呃 "寻找路易吉"
Ooh! No, that's definitely a date restaurant.
哦! 不对啊那绝对是个用来约会的餐厅
Mm. Pretty much every chick that goes there
嗯差不多每个小妞从那里出来
comes out with a baby bump and a ring.
都会搞大肚子搞到一枚戒指
That's not what's happening here.
我们的情况不是那样的
You do know anxiety restricts your blood flow?
你一定知道焦虑会限制你的血液流动吧?
I'm sure Gabe here can hook you up with some
我保证加布能用他的治疗慢性阳痿的超强伟哥
of his extra-strength Viagra for chronic impotence.
让你重新振作起来
Oh, please, you waifish preemie.
哦拜托你这个娘炮早产儿
Everyone knows that the active ingredient in Viagra
大家都知道伟哥里活性成分是
is my superhuman testosterone. It's magic.
我神奇的超出人类水平的睾酮
Did you actually just call your son a "Waifish preemie"?
你刚才确实叫你儿子是"娘炮早产儿"吗?
Don't worry, I hear like 4% of what he says.
不用担心他说的话我十句里听半句
Everything else just sounds
其他的听到也只当是
like a dying water buffalo stuck in a tar pit.
陷在沥青坑里垂死的水牛在叫声
Please tell me that's the reject pile.
你就直说他的话全是垃圾就好了
Okay, you know what? That's it.
好了你们知道吗? 就这样了
I don't need this. No, no, no.
我不需要这些不不是的
I may be a jock, but I knows ma clothes.
我虽然是运动狂人但是我也懂穿着打扮
Okay, Gabriel, I need you to
加百利我需要你去
get me that thrift-store plaid sports jacket.
给我拿那件二手店里的运动外套
And, Dad, I need you to get me the only cool tie you own,
然后老爸我需要你给我你唯一的那条像样的领带
the one that you think is too skinny.
那条你认为太窄的那一个
Oh, and grab your tie clip. Go!
哦顺便把领带夹也拿来快!
Jack? Yes?
杰克? 嗯?
You know that rambly fast-talk thing you do?
你知道你口无遮拦快人快语吗?
Yeah, it's pretty charming...
是的那一点很迷人...
No, it's annoying as shit. Don't do it.
错那狗屎样很讨人嫌千万别那样
I don't think that's the consensus.
我认为不是每个人都那么认为吧
Uh, yeah, it is.
呃是的大家都这么认为
Yeah, I got to go with the girls on this on.
没错这一点我和女生们意见一致
You just talk sparingly, and you never break eye contact.
你说话要惜字如金而且两人对视的时候不要先把视线移开
Like dragon eyes.
眼睛要像铜铃一样
Uh, conversely, that sounds a bit rape-y.
呃相反那听起来有点像目光强♥奸♥啊
Worked on you.
对你有效啊
Uncle Jack, you okay?
杰克叔叔你还好吧?
You know what, I don't even do
和你们说我以后
the rambly thing anymore, okay?
再也不口无遮拦了行了吧?
And, sorry, but I'm gonna wear whatever the fuck I want.
还有抱歉我他妈的要穿自己想穿的衣服
Is that the jacket? Yeah.
这就是那件外套吗? 是的
It's lovely. Can I...
看起来不错可以给我...
Yeah.
当然
It's pretty great.
相当棒
Sketch much?
干什么坏事呢
You stalking me now?
你现在是在跟踪我吗?
I'm grounded.
我被禁足了
If I have to watch one more reality show about drunk,
如果再让我看一集关于四十几岁
forty-something rich chicks,
有钱的酒鬼少♥妇♥的真人秀
I'll will myself to have a deadly aneurysm.
那我宁愿自己得致命的动脉瘤
Aw, that's super sad. Now go the fuck away.
啊哦那可太让人难过了现在给我滚开吧
So, why are you hiding out like a teenager to smoke weed?
那你为什么像个十几岁青少年一样躲在外面吸大♥麻♥?
Well, I was enjoying the solitude.
嗯我是在享受孤独
You're hiding. I'm taking some me time.
你是在避人耳目我这是自我时间
In a shed?
在个小棚子?
Fine.
好吧
Emma has me on a torture cleanse.
艾玛让我我进行酷刑般的身心净化
Says I smoke too much pot,
她说我抽得太多
which, given my thrice-a-day habit, is...
想想我的习惯是一天三次这...
an objective fact.
确实是客观事实
But at this point,
但是此刻
I don't think I can last another second in suboratory
我要和她争论如果没有大♥麻♥助力
without the help of marijuana.
我一秒钟都坚持不了
Are you happy now? We have a lot in common.
这样你高兴了? 我们有很多共同点
No.
没有
So?
那么?
Let's do this thing.
我么一起来吧
Ava, I'm not getting you high.
艾娃我不会让你一起嗨的
Well, if you don't share, I'll tell Emma
嗯如果你不分我我就去告诉艾玛
that you were sneaking out back to...
你偷偷溜出来去抽...
No. Stop.
不不可以
Don't do that anymore.
不要再那样做了
I'm not Lori.
我不是洛莉
Who are you talking to?
你这是和谁在说话?
Come on. Please.
拜托了拜托
Just... just this once? I swear I won't tell.
就只... 只这一次? 我发誓不会说出去的
Just this once.
就这一次
Actually, you know what, this feels like one of those sober,
实际上你知道吗这就像给那些戒酒的人
second-thought opportunities
重新考虑的机会
that mark the end of cerebral adolescence, so I...
意味着相信他们思想已经成熟所以我...
Let me be excruciatingly clear.
我要把丑话说在前面
If you tell Lori about this,
如果你把这事告诉了洛莉
I will... You'll break my legs?
我会... 你会打断我的腿?
Eat my face and puke in my exposed skull?
啃了我的脸然后吐在我的脑壳里?
Yep. Legit would do all those things, and worse.
是的正经人会做所有那些事甚至还有更厉害的
You know, this'll make you feel better.
你知道的这会让你感觉好点儿
Apparently Jack got high with his nephew Gabriel,
显然杰克和他的外甥加百利一起呼大了
and he's just a freshman.
而他才上高一
How would you know that?
你怎么知道的?
Well, Gabriel told his sister Marina,
嗯加百利告诉了他妹妹玛丽娜
who told Bailey Meyer, who told me,
玛丽娜又告诉了贝利·迈耶他告诉我的
so I Facebooked Gabriel and he says it's true.
因此我脸书上给加百利发了消息他承认了
They're, like, best buds now.
他们现在成了死党了
Jack tells him everything.
杰克和他无话不谈
Really?
真的吗?
Like what?
比如呢?
Give me something.
说点具体的
You mean something like...
你的意思是就像是...
Jack has a big, romantic dinner
杰克今晚和一个前任女友
with an ex-girlfriend tonight?
要共进浪漫而盛大的晚餐?
Hey! Not the weed!
嗨! 不要拿走大♥麻♥!
Just helping you with your cleanse.
只是为你的身心净化助一臂之力
Unh!
呃!
Hey. Hi.
嘿嗨