老实说（2015）

就该果断接受
You say thank you.
- 她走了吗 - 罗塞尔 放轻松
- Is she gone yet? - Russell, relax.
就让她们聊会吧 然后凯瑟琳 也就是琪琪
Let 'em chit-chat for a minute, and then Katherine/Kiki
就会从你生命中... 我去
will be out of your life for... oh, God!
名片特么都交换了
Business cards are being exchanged.
快过去
Get in there!
看起来你们挺投缘的
Looks like you two are hitting it off.
小心哦 小安 你几天前才抱怨过
Careful though, Ang. You were just saying the other day
你朋友多到烦了 所以...
how you had too many friends already, so...
凯瑟琳是个室内设计师了
Oh, well, Katherine's an interior decorator now.
还是那张老照片
Same photo.
我建议安琪雇她来重新装♥修♥你们的客厅
I suggested Angie hire her to re-do your living room.
就这么定了吧
So, we're doing it.
反正她已经很了解那房♥子了 对吧
I mean, she already knows the house, right?
- 肯定啦 - 并非 如此
- I sure do. - Not... really.
罗塞尔 你必须告诉你老婆
Russell, you have to tell your wife
她刚请了你的前任来装♥修♥你们家
that she just hired your ex to redecorate your house.
你们俩以前都好过两个月呢
You dated her for two months.
你们一起去了牙买♥♥加
You went to Jamaica together.
虽然你曾信誓旦旦地答应和我一起去雷鬼音乐节
Even though you pinky-promised to go to Reggae Fest with me.
雷鬼乐 牙买♥♥加音乐
你说得对 等我再见到安琪时
You're right. The next time I see Angie,
我就向她坦白
I'm gonna tell her.
- 嘿 宝贝 - 嘿
- Hey, babe. - Hey.
- 拜 宝贝 - 拜
- Bye, babe. - Bye, babe.
- 怎么回事 - 我现在不能说
- What was that? - I can't do it now.
她刚吃了一整碗的营养麦片
She's all hopped up on Grape-Nuts.
赶快过去告诉她
Get in there and tell her.
- 好吧 - 罗塞尔
- Fine. - Oh, and Russell?
- 说吧 - 别忘了
- Yeah? - Don't forget...
2016年的雷鬼音乐节 就在隔壁呐
Reggae Fest 2016, right around the corner, Mon.
雷鬼音乐节一般在加拿大举♥行♥
还有迷之牙买♥♥加口音
宝贝
Babe?
我有话想对你说
I need to talk to you about something.
说吧 我只是收拾一下
Yeah, sure. I'm just straightening up
以免凯瑟琳认为我们的客厅已经无药可救了
so Katherine doesn't think we're a lost cause.
和我去看牙医前一周才用牙线 是一个道理
Same reason I only floss a week before I go to the dentist.
等等 什么 你的意思是
Wait, what? Are... are you saying
她马上就要过来了
she's coming over here now?
你是说你不用牙线吗
Are you saying you don't floss?
看看我在车道上遇到谁了
Hey, look who I found coming up the driveway.
糟了 这下完蛋了 米奇
Not good. This is not good, Mitch.
你依旧可以挽救这局面啊
You can still save this.
你可以把安琪
I'll stay here while you
叫去厨房♥ 向她坦白 我会留在这圆场的
pull Angie into the kitchen and tell her.
记得告诉她要用牙线
Also tell her she should be flossing.
凯瑟琳 能麻烦你稍等一会吗
Katherine, can you excuse us for a minute?
既然你们已经请了她来
Okay, look, now that you guys have hired her,
- 不用太谢我 - 完了
- you're welcome for that... - Yeah, boy.
我们就别这么拘束了
Let's just drop the formalities.
琪琪 这是安琪 安琪 这是琪琪
Kiki, Angie. Angie, Kiki,
稍等 好巧哦
Wait. That's so funny,
因为罗塞尔有个前任也叫琪琪
because Russell used to date a girl named Kiki.
等等 你们请我来
Wait. Uh, you guys hired me
做你们的室内设计师
to be your interior decorator,
但罗塞尔他没跟你说吗
and Russell still hasn't told you?
我俩约会过
We used to date!
说出来真是太爽了
That is a load off!
时机真不错 刚刚好
Got it right in there. Just... just under the wire.
就这么插上嘴了
Just... snuck it on in there.
我们之所以要请室内设计师
The whole reason we hired a decorator
就是为了消除屋子里的婊气
was to de-skankify our house.
原来我们的室内设计师也是你的小婊砸
When were you going to tell me that our decorator
你本来打算瞒多久
was one of those skanks?
我本来正要坦白 还不是翠西半路杀进来
I was going to tell you, but then Tracy came in.
虽然她是咱们的好朋友
Look, I know we're all friends,
但我们都知道 搞破坏 她最在行
but I think we both know she ruins everything.
我们的房♥产经纪居然是罗塞尔的前任
Wow. So our realtor dated Russell.
我们怎么现在知道
How are we just finding out about this now?
只是你不知道
"We" Are not.
等等 所以你早就知道 但却瞒着我
Wait, so you knew about this and you didn't tell me?
你为什么不早点告诉我啊
Why didn't you tell me?
罗塞尔单身那会 我定了个规矩
When Russell was single, I had a rule
我只会告诉你那些
that I would only tell you about the women he dated
和他在一起超过三个月的女人
if they made it past the three-month mark.
真是个白♥痴♥的规矩
That seems like a stupid rule.
所以你才没听说过有三个汤娅
Well, that rule saved you from meeting three different Tonyas.
或许只有两个 有一个和他复合过
Or maybe it was two Tonyas, one of which he dated twice.
我不确定 而且我觉得问了会很尴尬
I wasn't sure and I felt awkward asking.
有意思 我想象的琪琪
That's interesting, because when I thought of Kiki,
可是另一幅样子
I got a different kind of image in my mind.
真的吗
Did you?
怎么不同了 比如 个子更高
Different how? Like... someone taller?
对 更高
Yeah. Taller.
那确实是其中之一
Oh, that's one of the things.
琪琪和我真的很不同
It's just that Kiki and I are different
大大 大大的不同
in so many, many, many ways.
比如说呢
Specifically, what?
不 不 咱不提具体的例子
Oh, no, no, no. No specifics.
只是感觉有些不同罢了
Just a general feeling of different... ness.
我就直说了吧
Okay, I'm just gonna put this out there.
该不会和琪琪是白人有关系吧
This wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that Kiki's white?
你说啥 琪琪
What? Kiki?
不 当然不是啊
Oh, no! Absolutely not!
不 不 绝对不是
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No.
困扰我的是 你没向我坦白
See, my whole problem is... is that you didn't tell me
你和她约过会
that you used to date her.
重点是 你对琪琪有意见
The point is you have a problem with Kiki.
不管是什么 如果你不爽的话
Whatever it is, if it makes you uncomfortable,
开除她就好了嘛
she has to be fired.
如果你想那么做 没关系啊
So if you want to take the lead on that, that's cool.
不
Oh, no.
看来你可能不是那么了解我嘛
Maybe you don't know me as well as you think you do.
因为啊
Because guess what.
我不开除凯瑟琳
Katherine is staying.
琪琪也一样
So's Kiki.
如果你提早告诉我
I'm just saying if you'd told me,
这样的悲剧本来可以避免的
then all of this could have been avoided.
可能吧 但要是放在平时...
Well, maybe this time, but usually...
我不说了
nope.
"平时"怎么地啊
"Usually" What?
别问了 好吧 听我说
No, no, no. Okay, listen.
我也不想吐槽你的 我是爱你的
I... I don't want to go here. I love you.
- 你那么完美又如此漂亮 - 赶紧说吧
- You're amazing and beautiful. - Just go there already
你是个大嘴婆
You're a big, fat blabbermouth.
什么
What?
那是大胸希拉的运动衫吗
Isn't that Big Sheila's sweatshirt?
就是那个胸超级超级大的妹子
The girl with the big, big, big, big, big, big boobs?
我可不是这么说的
That's not how I said it.
安琪听到 不懂才怪呢
But that's how Angie heard it.
你还不如干脆放罗塞尔和大胸希拉的
You might as well have played a sex tape
性♥爱♥视频呢
of Russell and Big Sheila.
- 他们拍性♥爱♥视频了 - 当然没有
- They made a sex tape? - No!
可能吧 应该有
Maybe. Yeah, probably.
但你那个枕头也很好看啊
No, but yours is pretty cool, too, though.
我觉得都很不错啊
I think they're both great.
罗塞尔
Russell.
各位好啊
Oh, hello, everybody.
枕头们
Pillows.
不得不说 你们夫妻俩真是恩爱啊
I have to say, you guys are a pretty great couple.
我真没想到我还会回到这里