东邻西舍

The Neighborhood S02E18

Part 3 May 15, 2020, 7:39 a.m.

我就该把他带到森林里解决掉
I should've took his ass to the woods.
够了伙计
You know what? That's it, man.
你太过分了我要告诉妈妈真♥相♥
You're taking this too far. I'm telling Mama the truth.
一块美味的蓝莓派能让你
Well, would a piece of this delicious blueberry pie
改变主意吗
change your mind?
你真以为能用派收买♥♥我吗
Do you seriously think you can buy me off with pie?
湖人队的球票呢
What about tikets to the Lakers game?
妈妈给你买♥♥了湖人队的球票
Mama got you Laker tickets?
还没买♥♥ 但如果我能想办法让自己哭出来
Not yet, but if I can figure out how to make myself cry,
湖人队忠实球迷
我们就能和杰克·尼科尔森一起看球了
it'll be Jack Nicholson, you, and me on the floor.
我走了
Okay, I'm off.
眼泪来了
Here come the tears.
我懂
Oh, I know.
没事的老弟
It's okay, baby bro.
溜溜上天堂了
Slinky's in heaven now.
这是怎么回事
What the hell is going on out there?
葛罗弗失控了
Grover's out of control.
好吧
Okay, uh...
他一开始攻击性有点强
so we got off to a pretty aggressive start,
但我觉得他开始冷静了
but I think he's beginning to calm down.
他已经两分钟没犯规了
I mean, he hasn't fouled anybody in almost two minutes.
戴夫现在是暂停
Dave, it's a time-out.
加油
Okay. Come on!
也许卡尔文叫暂停是为了
Look, maybe Calvin called the time-out
告诉葛罗弗不要乱来
to tell Grover to keep his elbows to himself.
犯规 12号♥
Foul, number 12!
够了我去跟卡尔文谈
That's it. I'm talking to Calvin.
我也去
Okay, I'm coming, too.
就连我们队的家长都想用眼神杀死我们
Even the parents on our team look like they want to kill us.
给力点裁判
Come on, ref!
那孩子带球走步的架势
That kid traveled so much,
好像是周末要去见他的亲生父亲
it's like he's going to see his real daddy for the weekend.
卡尔文
Calvin?
搞什么葛罗弗表现得像野兽
What the hell? Grover's acting like an animal!
可不是吗
I know, right?
忘了加州吧我可能是全世界最好的教练
Forget California, I may be the best coach in the world.
我让你教他打篮球
I asked you to teach him how to play basketball,
不是把他变成打手
not turn him into a goon.
你告诉我要让他坚强起来
You told me to toughen him up.
再说我们要赢了
Plus, we're winning.
他可能都用不上剩下的两次犯规
He might not even have to use his last two fouls.
犯规 12号♥
Foul, number 12!
好吧一次犯规
Okay, one foul.
你什么都不打算做吗
So you're not gonna do anything about this?
当然不我们比赛打到一半
No. Not in the middle of a game.
行那我去
Fine. Then I will.
天啊我妈看学校演出的那一幕又重演了
Oh, God, this is my mom at the school play all over again.
你想教我的孩子怎么玩阴的
You want to teach my kid how to play dirty?
没有这个我看你们怎么玩
Good luck doing it without this.
她知道我们还有一架子的球吧
She does know we have a whole rack of balls right here, right?
这派真好吃
This pie is delicious.
我知道
Yeah, I know.
我一直以为秘密配方是爱
I always thought the secret ingredient was love.
原来是愧疚
Turns out, it's guilt.
-孩子们 -妈妈
- Hey, boys. - Hey, Mama.
那是什么
What's that?
给你的礼物我终于
A gift for you. I think I finally
找到了一样东西
figured out something that will make up
能弥补我对你做的事
for what I did to you.
妈你不必这样的
Oh, Mom, you shouldn't have.
不过考虑到你残酷的背叛
Although, given your savage betrayal,
这也许是应该的
you probably should have.
快打开吧宝贝
All right, well, open it, baby.
好吧不管是什么
Okay, well, whatever it is,
希望它能让我忘记
hopefully it'll make me forget
我宝贝的...蛇
the memory of my precious-- snake!
没错我意识到再怎么做饭和打扫
Yeah. See, I realized that there's no amount
也无法取代你的蛇
of cooking and cleaning that could replace your snake.
但也许一条两倍大的蛇可以
But maybe one that's twice as big could.
你喜欢吗
Do you love it?
我喜欢
I know I do.
来我把它绕在你脖子上
Here, come on, let me put him around your neck.
看看它看看
Oh, look at him. Oh, look at that, aw...
它真可爱
He's so cute.
看看他妈妈
Look at him, Mama.
他太开心了都快哭出来了
He's so happy, he's about to cry.
他要开心死了
He gonna die.
拿下来
Get it off.
什么你说什么宝贝我听不见
What, wha-what'd you say, baby? I can't hear you.
-把蛇拿下来 -拿下来
- Get the snake-- get it-- get it off. - Get it off?
从你脖子上拿下来吗好
Like, take it off of your neck? Oh, okay.
给我要我帮你拿着吗好吧
Let me hold... You want me to hold him? Okay.
这就是惹你♥妈♥的♥下场
And that's what you get for messing with your mama!
也不打听打听老娘是谁
You better ask somebody!
所以你知道了
So you knew, huh?
废话
Hell yeah, I knew!
我在厨房♥就听见你俩说的话了
I heard you two talking when I was in the kitchen.
你听到了多少
How much did you hear?
这么多吧
About this much!
为了湖人队球票出♥卖♥♥♥自己的母亲
Selling out your own mother for a Laker ticket?
你才是这个家最大的毒蛇
You're an even bigger snake than this one!
蛇呢
Uh-oh, where'd it go?
不是吧
Aw, hell no!
-溜了溜了 -快走
- I'm moving! I'm moving! - Go!
妈你应该去看我比赛的
Mom, Mom, you should've seen it!
我们队靠我赢得了比赛
I made the game-winning play!
你得分了吗
You scored a basket?
没有我也得能摸到球呀
No, I would have had to touch the ball to do that.
那你又对别人犯规了
Oh, so you fouled another kid.
不是用不着他动手
Oh, no. He didn't have to.
对方最好的球员
The best player on their team
准备投制胜球时
was about to score the game-winning shot,
看见了葛罗弗
but then, when he saw Grover,
就投了个三不沾还尿裤子了
he threw up an airball and peed himself!
伙计进屋吧
Hey, come on, buddy. Let's go inside.
你去洗个澡
You should probably shower, and, uh,
我去找个律师
I should probably call an attorney.
卡尔文恭喜你
Well, Calvin, congratulations.
你把我儿子变成了怪物
You turned my son into a monster
就为了让你赢一场破篮球赛
just so you could win a stupid basketball game.
你开心了吧
I hope you're happy.
你这语气
When you say it like that,
好像我不应该开心一样
it sounds like I'm not supposed to be.
不可理喻
You're unbelievable.
杰玛
Look, Gemma.
你说他必须上场
You said that he had to play.
只有这个办法
Well, this is the only way that he could do it
不会让他觉得尴尬
without embarrassing himself.
真的吗
Oh, really?
原来你只是为了保护他
So this was just about protecting him
而不是为了你宝贵的连胜纪录吗
and not your precious winning streak?
为什么不能两者兼得呢
Why can't it be both?
卡尔文我们是要教导葛罗弗
Calvin, this was supposed to be
团队合作的意义
about teaching Grover the value of being on a team.
我那么信任你
I trusted you.
好好想想
Think about it.
如果葛罗弗上场表现很糟糕然后我们输了
If Grover would've went out there and played terrible, and we lost,
其他孩子都会怪他
all the other kids would have blamed him.
那他就再也不想加入球队了
And then he would never want to be on a team again.
这是你想要的吗