室内奇兵（2016）
The Great Indoors
第一季
剧集 | 室内奇兵（2016） | 导航列表
室内奇兵（2016）
The Great Indoors S01E04
Part 1
Aug. 6, 2020, 5:47 p.m.
嗓音机快让我疯了
That noise machine is driving me crazy.
你就不能像正常室友一样 看A片撸到睡着吗
Can't you just fall asleep to porn like a normal roommate?
确切来说这些蟋蟀在交♥配♥
Well, technically the crickets are mating.
如果你继续这样生活
Which is something you'll never do again
这辈子都别想交♥配♥了
if you keep living like this.
我可以在吊床上做♥爱♥
I can have sex in a hammock.
总重不能超过400磅
The total weight can't be more than 400 pounds,
但这是很好的规则[女伴瘦]
but that's a good rule anyway.
你得把东西从储藏间拿回来
You need to get your things out of storage.
杰克·戈登是时候安顿下来了
It's time for Jack Gordon to settle down.
好吧 我想你最了解我
Oh, okay, I guess you know me best.
我比你更了解你
I know you better than you.
来吧 随便问
Go ahead, ask me anything.
好的
All right.
我童年的关键性时刻是什么时候
What's a defining moment from my childhood?
简单 你妈忘了你的10岁生日
Easy, when your mom forgot it was your tenth birthday.
我的天
Oh, my God.
你是对的
You're right.
你为什么提起这事
Why would you bring that up?
你不能再过得
But it is time that you stopped living
像捕虾船上的大副一样了
like the first mate on a lobster boat.
现在比起我 你会更痛
This is gonna hurt you more than it's gonna hurt me.
说这话的时候通常是...
That's not usually how the phrase...
就凭这点
Well, just for that,
你要帮我去储藏间搬东西
you're gonna help me move my stuff out of storage.
我愿意 但我没什么
Ooh, I would, but I have that weak...
义气
...sense of obligation.
那我只剩下三个可怕的选择了
Well, that leaves me three terrible options.
早 工作上的朋友
Morning, work friends!
熊掌包
Bear claw?
你刚叫我们朋友吗
Did you just call us friends?
提前五个月完成任务
Five months ahead of schedule!
我说的是 工作上的朋友
I said "Work friends."
提前两个月完成任务
Two months ahead of schedule!
作为工作上的朋友 通常来说
So, as work friends, it's customary
在求人帮忙前 会先假装对彼此的事感兴趣
to feign interest in each other before asking for favors.
所以 你们的周末怎么样
So, your weekends-- how were they?
我有兴趣
I'm interested.
爱玛黑了罗兰的邮件 给布洛克发了提醒
Emma hacked Roland's email and sent a reminder to Brooke
今天是办公室的"丑毛衣日"
that today was ugly sweater day in the office.
你也被恶作剧骗了吗
I see you fell for the prank too.
下一个
Next.
梅森举办了经典的
Mason threw an epic
"男人挑女人选"派对
"Respectful Bros and Empowered Hos" Party.
性感 但是安全
It was sexy, but safe.
克拉克待在家里更安全
And Clark played it even safer by staying home.
作为男女平等主义者 我必须这样做
As a feminist, I had to.
我不喜欢让女人
I don't like subjecting women
因为在公众场合拒绝我而感到尴尬
to the awkwardness of having to reject me in public.
现在连9点都没到
It's not even 9:00.
你们怎么对别人周末怎么过的这么清楚
How do you guys already know everything about your weekend?
因为我们时时上传照片
Because we post everything.
可以节省很多时间
It saves so much time.
我不记得最后一次描述纸杯蛋糕是什么时候了
I can't remember the last time I had to describe a cupcake.
但你什么也不上传
But you don't post anything.
没有图片分享
No Instagram,
没有脸书时间线
no Facebook timeline.
你是黑客最大的挑战
You're like a hacker's greatest challenge.
我以为黑客最大的挑战
I thought a hacker's greatest challenge
是在30岁前做♥爱♥
was having sex before 30.
杰克吐槽
Jack burn!
爱玛说得对
Emma's right.
我们对你的个人生活一无所知
We know nothing about your personal life.
但现在我们是朋友了
But maybe now that we're friends...
朋友
Ha-ha, friends...
不 我只是开玩笑的
No, I'm just kidding.
不 我只是假装关心
No, I was just pretending to care
这样你们能帮我把东西从储藏间搬出来
so you guys would help me get my stuff out of storage.
你继续假装我就帮你
I'll help you if you keep pretending.
免费披萨加一个秘密我就帮
I'll do it for free pizza and one secret.
我请你们吃披萨
Yeah, I'll buy you guys some pizza,
秘密就是
and my secret is...
这盒面包是我在邮箱上发现的
I found those donuts on top of a mailbox.
我们走
Let's go!
早
Morning!
拜托 为什么只有我和梅森
Come on, how come Mason and I
体现了办公室精神
are the only ones in the office spirit?
你们去哪里
Where are you guys off to?
我带他们去做团队建设训练
I'm taking them on a team-building exercise.
太棒了 克拉克
Oh, that's great-- Clark?
我们帮他清空储藏间
We're helping him clean out his storage unit.
叛徒
Narc!
行啦 我批准 因为我是酷老板
All right, I'll allow it, only because I'm a cool boss.
自己说这话一点也不酷
It never sounds quite as cool when you have to say it yourself.
不会太久 没什么东西
We won't be long; there's not much in there.
我的天
Oh, my God.
中大奖了
Jackpot!
我去给你们买♥♥披萨
I'm gonna go get your pizza.
大多数是垃圾
Most of this is trash,
不能看 不能睡
so if you can't read it or sleep on it
不能用来扮怀孕的 全扔
or prevent pregnancies with it, then toss it.
以前会把谷歌♥地图打印出来吗
They used to print out Google Maps?
东德是什么
Ew, what's East Germany?
室内奇兵 第一季第四集
抱歉我们晚了
Sorry we're late.
导航带我们开了一条最奇怪的路
Waze took us on the weirdest route.
对 经过了凯文·哈特的新电影
Yeah, straight through the new Kevin Hart movie.
这是什么
What's this?
我让你们扔东西
I told you guys to throw stuff out.
这并不难
It's not that hard.
每天早上我都会扔掉你们写的文章
It's what I do with your articles every morning.
这些东西能让我们了解你
How could we throw all this out
怎么能扔呢
when it tells us so much about you?
我现在更了解你了
I know you so much better now,
不仅是因为我穿着你的裤子
and not just because I'm wearing your pants.
你没有脸书主页
See, you don't have a Facebook page,
所以我们为你建了一个
so we created one for you
包括个人照 封面以及时间线
complete with your profile pic, cover photo, and timeline.
全都有
Yeah, it's got everything.
看早期个人照
Look at this old profile pic.
那叫艺术照
That's called a glamour shot,
那是在商场发掘我的先生照的
and they were taken by a gentleman who discovered me at a mall.
和爱玛的时间线一样
And just like Emma's timeline,
你的复古照是最棒的部分
your throwback photos are the best part.
-什么 -什么
- What? - ?What?
看你和埃迪的旧照片
Look at this old photo of you and Eddie.
90年代时 是否规定了
In the '90s, was there a quota
一次身上一定得有多少种颜色
of how many colors you had to wear at once?
好了
There.
我刚取消了标签
I just untagged myself.
你保留了不少90年代的酷玩意儿
You kept a bunch of cool stuff from the '90s--
玩具 电子游戏
Furbies, Bop It--
我不知道还有男士的果冻凉鞋
and I had no idea they made jelly sandals for men.
这是我的
Those are mine!
在欧洲生产的
And they did, in Europe.
太酷了
It's all so cool!
看 这台电视
I mean, look, this TV
上面还有空调
has an air conditioner attached to it!
克拉克 你和我想的一样吗
Clark, are you thinking what I'm thinking?
后街男孩还想那样吗[多此一问]
Do the Backstreet Boys still want it that way?
我们应该用这些东西
室内奇兵（2016）
The Great Indoors
剧集 | 室内奇兵（2016） | 导航列表