足球教练（2020）

你会听到主场球迷对AFC里士满 不间断的嘘声
You're hearing AFC Richmond being booed lustily by their home fans,
不得不说 这不是没有理由的
and you have to say, not without good reason.
2比0 我们可以做得更好
2-0. We're better than that!
杰米 对不起 我没能给你那个 你想要的传球
Jamie. Jamie. Sorry, I didn't put that cross where you wanted it.
别放在心上 伙计
Forget it, mate.
嘿 如果我给你一点 能帮你提升球技的建议
Hey, would it be too forward if I gave you some advice
会不会太直白了
that might help improve your game a bit?
不会 请说吧
No. Please, anything.
你应该去找个时间机器 回到你妈妈
What you need to do is get yourself a time machine, and go back to the moment
即将跟一个毫无运动天赋的可悲小男人 上♥床♥的那一刻
when your mom was about to fuck a sad little man with no athletic talent.
把她拉起来 让她坐飞机去阿根廷 丢到马拉多纳的老二上
Pull her off him, fly her to Argentina, and drop her onto Maradona's cock.
希望对你有用 伙计
Hope that helps, mate.
好吧 够了
Right, that's it.
我受够了你侮辱所有人
I'm done with you being a prick to everyone.
要么我♥干♥倒你这老家伙 要么我被你这老家伙干倒
So, either I beat up an old man, or I let an old man beat me up.
管他的 动手吧
Fuck it. Let's go.
他妈的…
Fucking--
嘿
Hey, hey, hey!
冷静 都给我冷静
Easy, easy, easy now!
教练 告诉他们搏击俱乐部的 首要准则是什么
Coach, tell these boys what the first rule of my fight club is.
-禁止搏击 -禁止搏击 好吗听懂了吗
-No fight club! -No fight club. Okay? You understand?
看在手♥枪♥皮特的份上 各位 我们还要打下半场呢
For the love of Pistol Pete, y'all. We still got a second half to play.
请坐 所有人
Now, please, sit down. Everybody.
教练救了你 老家伙
Gaffer saved you, old man.
再敢说一次我老…
Call me old...
你试试看
one more time.
抱歉…
Sorry...
老爷爷
granddad.
我他妈弄死你
I'll fucking kill you!
4号♥桌排好了 从此刻开始就叫“无聊桌”
Table four is done and shall from now on be known as the boring table.
可我坐那一桌啊
But that's where I'm sitting.
我还没给伊莱恩肯纳安置好 讨厌的女人
I haven't placed Elaine Kenner. Awful woman.
她今晚不会出席 她的脸被自家的马踢了
She won't be attending tonight. She was kicked in the face by her horse.
小可怜 马没事吧
That poor thing. Is the horse okay?
看上去这支球队还是分♥裂♥的
Looks like we still got ourselves a team divided here.
教练 你知道我现在想什么吗
Coach, you know what I'm thinkin' about right now?
-《西区故事》 -你懂我 鲨鱼帮和火箭帮
-West Side Story? -You know it. Sharks and Jets.
你觉得这些家伙
You think these fellas
在体育馆跳跳舞就能化解矛盾了吗
could solve their problems with a dance-off at a gymnasium?
当然了 如果我没记错的话
Course, if memory serves,
里弗和贝纳多当场被刺身亡
Riff and Bernardo ended up getting knifed to death at that particular event.
不是 他们是在后面打架时死的
No, they didn't die until the rumble afterwards.
对
Right. Right, right, right.
我15岁的时候 做过安妮塔的候补演员
When I was 15, I was understudy for Anita.
我读的男校
All-boys school.
我们又剥开了内森洋葱的一层外衣
We have peeled yet another juicy layer of the Nathan onion.
彼尔德教练
Coach Beard!
今天的晚宴 是鸡肉和牛排二选一
For dinner tonight, it's either chicken or steak!
你不能选两种
You can't tick both!
好的
Okay!
败露了
Busted.
还有泰德
And Ted!
-在 -我想知道你的携伴是谁
-Yeah! -I need to know who your plus-one is!
是这位“两道主菜”先生
Well, that'd be Mr. Two Entrées here.
不行 他已经带了另一个人
No, he's already bringing a date!
嘿 你今晚有空吗
Hey, you free tonight?
-有啊 我每天晚上都有空 -好的
-I'm free every night, yeah. -Okay.
-我要带内森 -谁
-I'm gonna bring Nathan! -Who?
伟大的内森他就是我的伴儿
Nate the Great! He's gonna be my date!
而且因为一些显而易见的原因 我们想坐8号♥桌
And for obvious reasons, we'd love to be at table eight!
不行
No!
彼尔德 你吃鸡
And Beard, you're having chicken!
嘿 老板
Hey, boss.
周五睡衣日我要是早点知道就好了
Pajama Friday? Wish I woulda known.
我给你讲个故事 你听完肯定很开心
You're gonna get a kick outta this story.
-我17岁的时候… -泰德 我打断你一下
-When I was 17-- -Ted, let me just stop you there
不然你就要跟我讲你和睡衣的土味趣闻了
before you tell me a folksy anecdote about you and pajamas.
好的 你要是改变主意了 告诉我
Okay. When you change your mind, just let me know,
因为这是个好故事
'cause this one is a doozy.
抱歉 你找我有事吗我现在真的…
Sorry, was there anything you needed? 'Cause I'm really--
我、罗伊和杰米今晚能坐一张桌子吗
I was wondering if me, Roy and Jamie could all sit at the same table tonight.
-可以吗 -可以
-Is that possible? -Yes.
好极了因为我得让俩人冰释前嫌 我觉得应该可以
Great! 'Cause I got some fences I need to mend, and I think that might do the trick.
-泰德 我刚同意了 -好
-Ted, I just said yes. -Right.
天呐 这件真美 但是…
Oh, God, that one's absolutely beautiful, but...
但我觉得我已经驾驭不了了
I don't think I can get away with that anymore.
你当然可以 时尚的核心是自信
Sure you could. Fashion's all about confidence.
如果我不自信 我是绝不会 穿睡衣参加毕业舞会的
If I didn't have any confidence, I never would've worn pajamas to my prom
然后一整晚都待在监狱里
and ended up in jail the rest of that night.
但你不想听那个故事 所以我不讲了
But you don't wanna hear that story, so I ain't gonna tell it.
你知道吗我不烦你了
You know what? I'll get outta your hair.
你肯定为这次盛大的舞会 感到紧张吧 对吗
You're probably all revved up because of the big shindig, right?
不 我好得很
No, no, no. I'm absolutely fine.
虽然过去是我和鲁伯特一起举办宴会
I mean, even when Rupert and I were running the gala together,
但大部分工作都是我做的
I did most of the work myself.
所以 我一点不紧张
So, I'm not revved up at all.
其实 我现在情绪很平稳
I'm actually, really, feeling quite mellow.
下午好 我们遇到了一个大问题
Good afternoon. We have a huge problem.
嘉宾歌♥手罗比威廉姆斯不来了
Our musical guest, Robbie Williams, has canceled.
天呐
God!
哎呀 他是谁
Oh, no. Who is that?
淡定 没关系 这都不是事 让我好好想想
No, no, no. That's absolutely fine. It's not a problem. Let me just think.
好的 我们这么办 希金斯
All right, here's what we're going to do, Higgins.
今晚 我会告诉大家罗比取消了演出
Tonight, when I tell everyone that Robbie has canceled,
但是没关系 因为你会找到更好的替代
by then it won't matter because you will have found someone better.
-靠你了 -好的
-There ya are. -Right.
我是世界级的解决问题达人
I am a world-class problem solver.
哎呀 你能接得住 加油很好 看看呀
There it is. You got it. Catch it! Yep! Look at that!
你可以的 希金斯
You got this, Higgins!
瑞贝卡感谢你的辛勤付出
And Rebecca's grateful for all your hard work!
谢谢你 泰德
Thank you, Ted!
不行 我讨厌这条领带 宝贝
No. I hate it, babe.
这不是我的风格 没有兜帽 没有拉链
It's just not me. There's no hood, no zips.
没有涂鸦
There's no graffiti.
没有涂鸦
No graffiti.
疯了 我看上去像个银行家
Mad. I look like a banker.
裤裆那么紧 才不像呢
Not with trousers that tight around the crotch, you don't.
好吧 我看上去像一个屌♥很大的银行家
Fine. I look like a banker with a great cock.
宝贝 如果这种人存在的话 我们就不会在一起了
Babe, if those existed, we wouldn't be together.
随便啦
Whatever.
好吧
Okay.
如果你涉足时尚业 会得到更多的赞助
Look, you're gonna get more endorsements when you start embracing high fashion.
我只是帮你打造品牌
I'm just trying to help build up your brand.
杰米 别这样 你在干什么
Jamie, no. What are you doing?
我在做…
I'm doing...
风格
style.
是的 人们并不知道 其实我对时尚很在行
Yeah, people don't know it, but I'm good at this fashion shit.
-是吗 -对 时尚血统
-Are you? -Yeah, I'm like a progeny.
噢 是吗
Oh, yeah?
喂 蹲下 狗狗
Oi. Down, boy.
乖狗狗 去找好吃的
That's a good boy. Find the treat, yeah.
嘿 亲爱的
Hey, hon.
该死 是语♥音♥信箱 你发的消息我收到了
Shoot, I was hoping I'd catch ya. Got your message.
看来咱俩玩上了电♥话♥鬼抓人游戏 现在你是“鬼”了
Playing a little phone tag, it appears. And you are now it.
对了 你猜怎么着
Hey. Guess what.
我穿着你让我带的西装
I'm wearing the suit you told me I should bring.
你是对的 一如既往
You were right, as always.
好吧 就这些 我爱…我想你
Yeah. Okay, so, that's it. I love-- I miss ya.
你替我给小家伙一个拥抱
And just go ahead and give the little guy a squeeze for me.
我们之后再聊 再见