爱你，维克托

Huh. Your hair's straight today.
你是什么人 头发警♥察♥吗
Who are you? The hair police?
我头发是直的 我投降
My hair's straight. I surrender!
那是我的光盘 奥马尔 我要留着 好吗
They're my DVDs, Omar! I'm keeping them, okay?
你甚至都不看《妙女神探》
You don't even watch Rizzoli and Isles!
欢迎各位留校的同学
Welcome, detention-ees.
今天我们要把这个地方变成一流的
Uh, today we're gonna be getting this place in tip-top shape
春季舞会举办地
for the Spring Fling.
安德鲁和蕾可 你们俩一组
Andrew and Lake, you're a team.
米娅和 独蛋侠去哪儿了
Mia, and... where's Lone Stone?
这里
Here.
我在这里 抱歉 我刚刚
I'm here. Sorry, I was...
去上厕所了
going to the bathroom.
我听说只有一个蛋蛋的人 尿尿时间更长
I hear it takes longer to pee when you only have one ball.
从医学上讲 这是完全不正确的
That is not at all medically accurate.
还有我需要澄清一下 我有两个蛋蛋
And just to be clear, I have two balls.
只有一个蛋蛋并没有什么值得羞愧的
There's no shame in just having one.
我爸爸就只有一个 他生活也很充实
My father just had one. Led a very full life.
现在开工吧
Now get to work.
嘿 你 傻瓜
Hey, you. Goofball.
住手 我可是有武器的
Stop. I have a weapon.
我的天哪
Oh, my God.
对不起 电梯坏了
Sorry. The elevator's broken.
但好的方面是
But on the plus side,
那些楼梯对你的臀肌很有好处
all those stairs are killer for your glutes.
这些人是谁
who are these people?
你觉得没有室友 我们就能租下
You think that we could afford an apartment in Brooklyn
布鲁克林的公♥寓♥吗 不能
with no roommates? No.
实际上 我更喜欢"合租者"这个术语
I prefer the term "Flatmates," actually.
让我听起来更像欧洲人
It makes us sound more European.
我是贾斯汀 J发柔和一点 像"啾"
I'm Justin, with soft J, like "Joosh."
我是维克托
I'm Victor.
-我是艾薇 -我是基姆
- I'm Ivy. - I'm Kim.
提前说一句
And before you ask,
我的代词是他们 他们 他们的
my pronouns are they, them, theirs.
好的 很高兴认识 他们
Oh, okay. Nice to meet... they.
所以你是怎么回事
So what's your deal?
我怎么回事
My deal?
我只是 来参观的
Oh, I'm just, uh, visiting.
我是布拉姆和西蒙的准大学同学
I'm Bram and Simon's pre-frosh.
没错 我们以前上同一所高中
Yeah. We all used to go to the same high school,
所以我的辅♥导♥员就帮我们联♥系♥了
so my college counselor hooked us up.
想来体验一下纽约大学
Wanted to get a taste of NYU.
看看学校有什么篮球项目
You know, check out the basketball program.
什么
What?
你想来纽约大学学体育
You wanted to come to NYU for the sports?
那你的辅♥导♥员把你跟一群
Ooh, your college counselor hooked you up
错误的人安排在了一起哟 姐妹
with the wrong-ass people, girl.
我不是姐妹
I'm not a girl.
-别管他 -他没有恶意
- Don't mind him. - He's harmless.
任何布拉姆和西蒙的朋友都是我们的朋友
Any friend of Bram and Simon's is a friend of ours.
没错
Absolutely.
你真应该跟我们一起参加今晚的脏靴派对
You should totally come with us to Messy Boots tonight.
对
Yes!
-天哪 -脏靴派对是什么
- Oh, my God! - What's Messy Boots?
-是城里最棒的派对 -没错
- It is the best party in town. - Yes.
他们会办那种变装秀
They have this drag show
请一些观众到台上
where they bring people from the audience on stage.
不了
Nah.
我想说 关于准大学生的事
I mean, it's just, I just have so much to do
我还有好多要做 所以
with this pre-frosh thing. So...
我能跟你单独说几句吗
Um, can I steal you for a second?
-好啊 -好的
- Yeah. - Yeah. Okay.
很高兴认识你们
Nice to meet you guys.
很高兴认识你
Nice to meet you.
准大学生是什么东西
What is a pre-frosh?
好吧 你刚才说的是什么
Okay, what was that?
为何你要跟他们说你是我的准大学同学
Why did you tell them that you're my pre-frosh?
因为我不认识他们
Because I don't know them.
我跟你都不太熟
I barely know you.
听着 这事我只跟西蒙说过 而且
Look, Simon is the only person I've told, and I...
我没有准备好在一群陌生人面前展露自己
I'm not ready to open up to a whole bunch of strangers.
好吧 我懂了
Okay. I get it.
我很抱歉 我忘了你第一次出柜的时候
And I'm sorry. I forgot how scary it is
有多么可怕
when you're first coming out,
即便是在一群同志面前
even around other gay people.
对不起
I'm sorry.
我知道我到这里来是为了体验同志的生活
I, I know I came out here to experience gay stuff,
-但这一切都让我感到太... -基了
- but it all just feels so... - Gay?
来 我给你看样东西 好吗
Come on. I gotta show you something, all right?
终于完了
Finally.
我都开始担心你是不是会在你的额头上
I was starting to worry you were back there getting devil horns
纹一对恶魔角
tattooed on your forehead.
这在某些人头上看起来真的很酷
Which is a very good look for some people.
我能看看吗
Can I see it?
可爱极了 看这个小环
Oh, it's cute! A little hoop.
你喜欢吗
Do you love it? Oh!
你真棒 我妈妈从不让我做这些
You're rad. My mom never let me do anything like this.
是的 我是个酷妈妈
Well, yeah. I'm a cool mom.
我就是十分相信
I just really believe that
你得让你的孩子充分表达自己
you have to let your children express themselves.
对吗 皮拉
Right, Pilar?
打两个孔一共八十
That'll be 80 for the two piercings.
两个
Two?
你还打了哪里 皮拉
What did you do, Pilar?
你说一切对你来说都太基了
You said everything was too gay for you,
所以我想得多来些男性气息
so, thought I'd butch it up.
你是来这里学体育的对吗
You came here for the sports, right?
那就看看你有什么能耐
Let's see what you got.
米娅·布鲁克斯
你们玩得怎样 开心吗
你觉得怎样
So, what'd you think?
太尴尬了
That was embarrassing.
在溪木高中 我还算打得比较好的
At Creekwood, I'm actually considered good.
-我懂 这些人特别棒 -对啊
- Oh, I know. These guys are insane. - Yeah.
杰森进过NBA打球
Jason was in the NBA.
第一位公开的同性恋球员
First openly gay player.
这局打得不错 布拉姆
Hey, good game, Bram.
也许下次你甚至还能投进一个
Maybe next time you'll even make a shot.
你太过分了
Oh, that's cold.
-快滚 -他是同志
- Get out of here! - He's gay?
他们都是 这是个同志联盟
They all are. It's a gay league.
我们一周在这里打两次球
We play here twice a week.
我只想告诉你 做同志不只有一种方式
I just wanted you to see that there's no one way to be gay.
对吗 你可以像女人
Right? You can be femme,
也可以像男人 体格健壮
you can be butch, athletic,
或像西蒙那样 可怜的小弱鸡
or in Simon's case, painfully un-athletic.
但有一样东西你不能有 那就是恐惧
But the one thing you can't be is afraid.
维克托 你到这里来是寻找归属感
Victor, you came here because you wanted to belong.
我住的公♥寓♥里全是基得不行的室友
I got an apartment filled with super gay roommates
他们会很兴奋地接受你
who would be thrilled to accept you.
所以不要太害怕接纳他们
So don't be too scared to let them in.
-好吗 -好
- Yeah? - Yeah.
所以 这里所有人都是同志吗
So... everyone here is gay?
没错
Oh, yeah.
-连达吕斯也是吗 -是
- Even Darius? - Yeah.
他看着有两米高了
He's, like, six-foot-eight.
你该看看他穿着高跟鞋的样子
Oh, you should see him in heels.
独蛋侠垃圾
那只是我忘记了
That's just me forgetting...
你 是 个 可爱
You. Are. A. Cute...
我知道 对吗 太冒犯了
I know, right? So offensive.