老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S01E18
Part 1
Aug. 2, 2021, 11:13 p.m.
"老爸老妈的浪漫史"
前情提要
Previously on How I Met Your Mother.
她太棒了, 她不可思议,幽默有趣而且...
She was completely amazing,she was amazing and funny and...
你对Ted有感觉
You have feelings for Ted?
也许
Maybe.
我刚收到来自一家烹饪学会的奖学金邀请
I've just been offered a fellowship
at a culinary institute
在德国
in Germany.
想试试远距离恋爱吗?
Do you wanna try long distance?
要
Yes!
远距离恋爱遭透了?我今晚一定要和你谈谈
This long distance thing sucks, huh? And I really need to talk to you tonight.
她要甩了我
She's gonna dump me!
她不会和你分手的, Ted
She's not gonna break up with you, Ted.
喂?
Hello?
你想过来吗?
Do you wanna come over?
孩子们, 你们的奶奶常说,凌晨两点以后不会有什么好事发生
Kids, your grandma always used to say to me,"Nothing good happens after 2:00 a.m,"
她是对的,凌晨两点就回家睡觉吧
and she was right,when 2:00 a.m. rolls around,just go home and go to sleep.
这就是一个好例子:
Case in point:
喂?
Hello?
嗨, Ted, 是Robin
Hi, Ted, it's Robin.
我知道已经很晚了, 但是
Listen, I know it's late,but
你想过来吗?
do you wanna come over?
让我们回溯一点
Let's back up a little
二十小时前
twenty hours ago
坐下
Sit.
好孩子, 好了, 记住
Good boys. Okay. Remember
不要碰酒柜
stay out of the liquor cabinet.
...电视播音员的生活是有益的
...So,the life of a television reporter
is very rewarding,
我很希望你们能以此作为职业, 谢谢
and I strongly urge you to consider it as a career.Thank you.
说吧
Yeah.
你有未婚夫吗?
Do you have a fiance?
昨天Marshall来了,他们刚学会“未婚夫”这个词
Marshall was here yesterday.They just learned the word "fiance"
不, 我没有未婚夫
No, I don't have a fiance.
那你和谁住在一起?
Then who do you live with?
嗯，事实上, 我有五只狗
Well, actually, I've got five dogs.
你不会孤独吗?
Don't you get lonely?
不, 我有五只狗
No, I've got five dogs.
我奶奶有五只猫, 她觉得孤独
My Grandma has five cats and she gets lonely.
但那是猫, 我不是什么可悲的猫女士
Well, yeah, that's cats.I'm not some pathetic cat lady.
你奶奶也不是
Not that your grandmother is...
还有人有问题吗?
Does anyone else have a...
说吧
Yes.
你是同性恋吗?
Are you a lesbian?
不 你是吗?
No, are you?
一个人住并不代表就是同性恋...
Just because a woman lives alone doesn't mean she's a les...
好了
Okay.
让我们鼓掌感谢播音员Robin
Let's have a big hand for Robin the reporter!
好，我们的下一位客人是...
All right, our next guest is another friend...
Robin, 你报道过火车相撞吗?刚才我可见到了.
So, Robin, you ever report on train wrecks
cause I just saw one. What up?
小小地击掌
Tiny five.
别看你现在笑的开心
Laugh now.
这些孩子是魔鬼,他们会把你活吞了
Those kids are monsters.They're gonna eat you alive.
他的工作是…
He has a job doing...
你是做什么的？
What do you do?
呵呵, 拜托
(chuckles):Please.
孩子们 我们来乐乐
Kids, let's rap.
你们对我怎么过活大概没什么兴趣
You guys don't give half a brown Crayola
what I do for a living, do you?
对
No.
我知道你们想要什么.
魔法!
No, no. I know what you want.
Magic!
耶!
Yeah!
喂?
Hello?
为什么她还没打来?
Why hasn't she called yet?
好了, 你这样会把自己弄疯的
Okay, you're making yourself crazy.
现在是星期六的晚上, 出去玩玩吧
It's Saturday night.Go out and do something.
我♥干♥吗出去呢, 我有女朋友...眼下
No, what's the point of going out?
I got a girlfriend. For now.
而且如果我出去谁看你们的新闻呢?
Besides, if I go out,who's gonna watch the news?
我提供了你们一半的收视率
I'm like half your viewership.
你说我们有两个观众高看我们了
I'm flattered you think we have two viewers.
暂停
And, we're clear.
Scherbatsky, 你有男朋友吗?
So, Scherbatsky. Got a boyfriend?
没有, 为什么今天老遇到这个问题
No, and why does this keep coming up today?
我以为和你打电♥话♥的是你男朋友
I just thought that guy you were on the phone with...
哦不, 那是Ted, 只是朋友
What? Oh, no. That was Ted.He's just a friend.
我们曾经有可能在一起
I mean, there was this moment where we almost dated,
但是我们想要的完全不同
but we want completely different things.
现在他有个女朋友在德国,他觉得她今晚会打电♥话♥来和他分手
Anyway, now he has his girlfriend in Germany and he thinks she's calling to dump him tonight,
但我想不会
but I don't think she is.
还有我们想要的完全不同
And, besides,we want completely different things.
我们应该上♥床♥
We should have sex.
什么?!
What?!
为什么不呢?
Why not?
我们都单身, 我们都很迷人
We're both available. We're both
attractive.
而且我们都擅长此道, 至少我擅长
We're both good at it. At least, I'm good at it.
即使你不好, 也不用担心,我还是会很开心的
And even if you're not, don't worry.
I'll have a good time either way.
我不敢想象你的发胶壳撞击床头板的画面
Well, moving past the horrifying image of your hair helmet clanging against the headboard
我不会和同事交往的
I don't get involved with people I work with.
交往? 谁说交往了?
Get involved? Who said get involved?
我只是说我们应该上♥床♥,没关系
I'm just saying we should have sex,it could be fun.
上♥床♥没关系
Having sex is fun.
我的号♥码, 有时间打给我
Home number. Call me anytime.
今晚有很多本地队伍的行动…
A lot of local teams in action tonight...
伙计们
Hey, guys.
想我吗?
Miss me?
我也想你们
I missed you, too.
嗨, Ted, 是Robin
Hi, Ted, it's Robin.
我知道已经很晚了, 但是
Listen, I know it's late,but
你想过来吗?
do you wanna come over?
Ted?
Ted?
哦, 是, 我在
Yeah. Hi, I'm here.
你想过来吗?
Do you wanna come over?
为什么? 怎么了?
Why? What's up?
我刚装好了果汁机,准备调点果汁
Well, I just finally set up my new juicer, and I was gonna make some juice.
然后我想, 谁喜欢果汁呢?
And I was like,You know who likes juice?
Ted!
Ted!
我爱果汁
I love juice.
太好了, 那你想过来做果汁吗?
Great, so you wanna come over and make juice?
凌晨两点以后, 睡觉吧
When it's after 2:00 a.m, just go to sleep
因为凌晨两点以后的决定都是错误的决定
Because the decisions you make after 2:00 a. m.are the wrong decisions
好, 我过来, 我们喝果汁
Okay, sure, I'll come over, we'll...juice.
对, 我们喝果汁
Yes, we'll juice.
好
Okay.
好, 再见
Okay, bye.
再见
Bye.
这没关系, 这完全没关系
This is fine. This is totally fine.
什么没关系?
What's fine?
哦, 我要去一个女孩家做果汁
Oh, I'm going over to this girl's house
to make some juice.
呵呵, 好
Nice.
不, 不是你想的那样
No, it's not like that.
我们像朋友那样做果汁
We're juicing as friends.
我有女朋友, 我不会背叛她的
See, I have this girlfriend. I would never cheat on her.
她住在德国
She lives in Germany.
四个小时之前她就应该打电♥话♥跟我谈一个很严重的问题
See, she was supposed to call me four hours ago to have a serious talk.
但是到现在还没打, 我不知道...
I still haven't heard from her. I don't know...
对不起, 我的麻烦烦到你了
Sorry to bug you with my problems.
我猜出租车司机要变成酒吧招待了
Guess cab drivers are the new bartenders, huh?
说的一点也不错, 孩子
You ain't kidding, kid.
来点?
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
剧集 | 老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005） | 导航列表