老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）

How I Met Your Mother S01E08

Part 4 Aug. 2, 2021, 11:12 p.m.

我呢
Woe is me.
"我还没有结婚
我的卵巢在萎缩"
"I'm not married yet. My ovaries are shrinking."
Ted! 如果你现在想结婚
你可能结的, 但是你不想
Ted! If you wanted to be married by now,you would be,but you're not.
你知道为什么吗?
因为你太吹毛求疵啦
And you know why? Because you're irrationally picky.
你太容易分心
和失去兴趣啦
You're easily distracted and you're utterly anhedonic.
- 失去兴趣?
- 失去兴趣
-"Anhedonic"? -Anhedonic.
我的意思你不能享受事情
It means you can't enjoy anytng.
我不能吗
The hell I can't.
- 我在享受这个
- 我知道这些规则!
-I'm enjoying this. -I know. This rules!
我很抱歉我把剑拿下来了
I'm sorry I took those swords down.
伙计, 没事
Dude,that's okay.
这让我们能玩剑击
不是吗?
It lead to this totally rad swordfight,didn't it?
是啊, 确实
Yeah,it did.
你记得我们刚得到这两把剑的时候吗?
you remember when we first got these swords?
是我们搬进来的那天
It was the day we moved in.
恭喜, Marshall, 我们住在
一个墙上有挂剑的公♥寓♥
Congratulations,marshall,we live in an apartment with swords on the wall.
单子上的梦想
现在实现一半啦
List of lifelong dreams,you're now half as long.
糟糕, 我弄掉了
这桌子的一个螺丝钉
Crap,I'm missing one of the screws for this table.
用胶粘吧
Just use this wood glue.
粘的住
It'll hold.
噢天那, 我马上去
Oh god, I'll be right there.
Kevin, 我很抱歉我得走了
Kevin,I'm so sorry. I have to go.
我的朋友被剑刺伤了
My friend's been stabbed with a sword.
Hab slosi' quch!
Hab slosi' quch!
这样很不礼貌你不尊重我
It's a klingon insult. You have no honor.
你知道, 如果你觉得要走
你可以坦诚相对
You know,if you felt this way,you could've just been upfront.
不, 我发誓, 这是真的我...
No,I swear,that was a real call. I just...
噢, 算了
oh,forget it.
我刺伤了Lily
I stabbed lily.
我刺伤了我的未婚妻
I stabbed my fiancee.
别这样, Marshall
Come on,marshall,
你真觉得她还是
你的未婚妻吗?
do you really think she's still your fiancee?
我开玩笑的
I'm kidding.
嘿, 我认为你们
应该得到公♥寓♥
Hey,I think you guys should have the apartment.
但是你如此勇敢的为它而战
But you fought so bravely for it.
我不是为公♥寓♥, 我是为...
I wasn't fighting for the apartment,I was fighting for...
我不知道... 为了让
所有的东西保持原状
I don't know... for everything to stay the way it is.
但是我不用得到它, 那么...
But I'm not going to get that,so...
认真的, 收下吧, 是你们的了
seriously,take the place,it's yours.
她还好吧?
Is she okay?
医生在给她包扎她会没事的
They're just patching her up. She's going to be fine.
那么听好我正要和
这女孩约会, Jackie...
So get this: I was on a date with this girl,jackie...
怎么? 你们说她不错啊
what? You said she's fine.
那么无论如何
我和这女孩在约会, Jackie...
So anyway,I was on a date with this girl,jackie... wow,jackie,you make a really great first impression.
哇, Jackie, 你给
我很好的第一印象
wow,jackie,ou make a really great first impression.
我觉得今晚你的结束语
会是...
I have a feeling that tonight you might end up being jackie...
嗯很抱歉, 我得用
质量法来评判你
Yeah. I'm sorry,I'm going to have to lemon law you.
已经传播出去了
这会实现的
It's out there. It's a thing.
质量法是伟大的发明!
The lemon law is a thing!
该死, 我应该叫它Barney法
Damn,I should've called it barney's law.
- 但你完全...
- 让他沉醉下吧
-But you totally... -just let him have this one.
好了
All set.
她说她想见质量不合格的
“圆桌”骑士
She said she'd like to see the knights of the poorly constructed roundtable?
是我们
That's us.
剑击?
A swordfight?
抱歉, Lily
Sorry,lily.
星期一, 我要去教导我班上的
On monday,I'm going to have to tell my kindergarten class,
小朋友不要拿着利器跑
who I teach not to run with scissors,
我的未婚夫就是这样刺穿我的
that my fiancee ran me through with a frickin' broadsword.
嗯, 公平的说
并没有把东西刺穿
Well,just to be fair,it didn't go all the way through.
我很抱歉, 现在是在讨论
你刺伤我的程度吗?
I'm sorry,is this a discussion of the degree to which you stabbed me?
你是对的
You're right.
我很抱歉
I'm sorry.
我们在为谁能拥有
这间公♥寓♥而战, 我赢了
We were fighting to see who gets the apartment,and I won.
呃, 你没有
Uh,you didn't win.
我... 呃... ... 把它让给你的
I... uh... ...gave it to you.
- 你知道吗...?
- 等等, 等等
-You know what...? -Wait,wait,wait.
我并不想要那公♥寓♥
I don't want that apartment.
那是男孩子住的
It's a boy apartment.
那里...
充满着剑和电子游戏还有...
It's... full of swords and video games and...
闻起来象男生的味道
kind of smells like dude.
我的意思是, 现在住那很好
但是我们结婚后
I mean,it's fine for now,but when we get married,
我想和你开辟新的生活
……在新的地方
I want to start a new life with you... in a new place.
会想念老地方的
Gonna miss the old place.
我也会
I will,too.
但是我们大概一年内
都不会结婚
But we're not going to get married for,like,a year.
是啊, 那是未来的
Marshall的问题
Yeah,that's future marshall's problem.
让他去处理那些吧
Let that guy deal with it.
是啊
Totally.
可能是失血过多
的原因, 我饿了
Maybe it's the massive blood loss talking,but I'm starving.
我们去吃东西吧
Let's go get some dinner.
我知道个地方
I know just the place.
中国餐厅我还是不敢相信
Chinese restaurant. I still don't believe it.
我就说吧
I told you.
嘿, 干杯生活是多变的
Hey,a toast. Life is full of changes.
某天你有间公♥寓♥, 下一天
可能就变成卖♥♥饺子的了
One day you have an apartment,the next day it's a house of dumplings.
但是重要的东西不会改变
But the important stuff doesn't change.
为重要的东西而干
To the important stuff.
干杯
Here,here. Cheers. Cheers.
为质量法而干
And to the lemon law.
自己和自己干
Self click.
还有, 这是我买♥♥的杯子
And by the way,I bought these glasses.
在宜家买♥♥的
Bought them at ikea.
这些是我的杯子!
These are my glasses!
我喜欢这首歌♥
好久没听过了
I love this song. I haven't heard this in forever.
这是你大二时候
给我做的混合磁带
And I'm pretty sure this is a mix tape you made me in sophomore year.
对, 是哦
Yeah,right.
Lily, 你的公♥寓♥有
最好的上海饺子
Lily,your apartment makes the best shanghai dumplings.
我爱你, Lily派
1998年情人节快乐
I love you,lily pad. Happy valentine's day 1998.