老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S01E13
Part 2
Aug. 2, 2021, 11:12 p.m.
It haunts me.
恩, 后来怎么了?
So,what happened next?
好了
Okay.
基本规则已经建立了
Ground rules have been established.
现在让我看看你说了那么多的行动怎么进行
Now let's see some of these moves I've heard
so much about.
等等,等等
Wait,wait,wait,wait,wait.
我们来做所有单身女性都想在婚礼上干的偷走花球
Let's do all the single ladies in this joint a big favor and steal the bouquet.
好, 但我们得...
Yes,but we'll need...
分散大家注意力
a diversion.
接吻!
kiss!
吻! 吻, 来一个!
Kiss! Kiss,come on!
接吻! 接吻! 接吻!
Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!
走, 走, 快走
Go,go,go,go,go,go,go.
那就是花球的下落
So that's what happened to the bouquet.
你知道, Victoria干的好
You know,good for Victoria.
真是邪恶的传统
It's such an evil tradition.
你不会在你的婚礼上抛花球?
You're not gonna do it at your wedding?
天, 我要拿起那束花弹
Hell,I'm gonna take that flower-grenade
甩到人群里然后大叫
and chuck it into the crowd and scream,
"爬过来抢吧, 婊♥子♥们!"
"crawl for it,bitches!"
那就是女孩们想做的
That's just what girls do.
那么, 你们两去哪了?
So,where'd you guys go?
很不错
是吗?
very nice.
Yeah?
好吧, 我其实不知道怎么跳踢踏舞
Okay,I don't really know how to tap dance.
我也分不出来
I couldn't tell.
真的
Really.
今晚我们不能怎么样太遗憾了
it's too bad you're not gonna get some tonight.
如果我想, 我就能
if I wanted some,I could get some.
不, 你不能
No,you couldn't.
你是个男人
You're a dude.
- 我能干什么
- 你完全能干点什么
- I could get some.
- You could totally get some.
我们今晚不能接吻
We're not gonna kiss tonight.
如果 如果我们接吻了
if if we kiss,
所有这些都会变的现实
all of this becomes real.
你 你可能舌头伸太长
You you might use too much tongue.
我可能伸的不够长
I might not use enough.
然后突然,这些被破坏
And then suddenly,poof,spell's broken.
我舌头在你嘴里会用的恰倒好处的
I will use exactly the right amount of tongue.
好吧, 这样怎么样?
Okay,how about this?
任何初吻的最棒部分都是引发的过程
The best part of any first kiss is the
lead-up to it.
嘴唇接触到的前一刻
The moment right before the lips touch.
就象前奏锣鼓
It's like a big drumroll.
所以...
So...
今晚
how about tonight,
我们只进行到前奏怎么样?
we just stick with the drumroll?
好吧
Okay.
但我们不能接吻
But we can't kiss.
好吧
Okay.
前奏锣鼓?
A drumroll?
对
That's it
所以, 那, 你就...
so,what,you just...
你就说晚安, 回家...
you said good night,came home and...
独自敲鼓?
performed a drum solo?
Ted, 你这个蠢家伙!
Ted,you're such a doof!
我是说, 这女孩听起来那么棒
I mean,this girl sounds amazing.
她确实很棒
She was completely amazing.
她还很幽默
She was amazing and funny,
我们很合拍
and we connected on every level,
而且我们再也不会见面了
and I'm never gonna see her again.
该死, 我得再见到她!
Damn it,I have to see her again!
对! 对!
Yes! Yes!
行动起来吧, 兄弟
So let's get to work,man.
关于她你还知道什么?
What else do you know about her?
什么也没了 她叫Victoria
Nothing.Her name's Victoria
这就是全部我知道的
that's all I got.
等下, Claudia, Claudia知道
Wait,Claudia,Claudia would know.
Claudia正在渡蜜月
Claudia's on her honeymoon.
她两周后会回来 那时候打给她
She'll be back in two weeks,call her then.
好, 两周
Yes,two weeks.
好主意
Good idea.
我现在就打给她
I'm calling her now.
别, Ted, 你不会去搞砸蜜月的
No,Ted,you don't mess with a honeymoon.
来吧, 伙计
come on,dude.
问下她蛋糕
Ask her about the cake.
Ted?
Ted?
嘿，Claudia!
Hey,Claudia!
盛大的婚礼, 美妙的祝酒词, 美味的食物
Great wedding,beautiful toast,touching stuff.
蜜月怎么样?
How's the honeymoon?
听着, 我打电♥话♥是因为昨晚我遇到一个女孩
Listen,I'm calling because last night
I met this girl,
我在想你是否知道...
and I was wondering if you had...
你在开我玩笑吧!
you have got to be freaking kidding me!
又来了
here we go.
24小时前, 你还求我...
24 hours ago,you were begging...
求我带另个女孩参加我婚礼
begging me to bring some other girl to my wedding,
现在
and now,
你就和她分了?
you're over her?
我向前走了?
I've moved on?
她叫什么?
What was her name?
是我的胖堂妹Lindsay吗?
Is it my fat cousin Lindsay?
别觉得尴尬 她眼睛很美
Don't be embarrassed,she has pretty eyes.
不是
no.
她叫Victoria
Her name was Victoria.
我不知道她姓什么
I don't know her last name.
幸运的是
lucky for you,
我知道嘉宾名单上的每一个人
I know that guest list backwards and forwards.
谢天谢地
Thank god.
不幸的是
Unlucky for you,
我婚礼上没有叫Victoria的人
there was no Victoria at my wedding.
再见, Ted
Goodbye,Ted.
婚礼上没有叫Victoria的
There was no Victoria at the wedding.
可能她用了第二个假名
Maybe she used a second fake name.
她真行
she's good,
她真是行啊
she's very good.
也许她是个幽灵
Maybe she was ghost.
这就是为什么她不吻你
That's why she didn't want to kiss you
因为你会穿过她的身体感觉到一丝凉意
because you'd just pass right through her
and feel really cold for a second.
我的天, 我刚想出了个绝妙的剧本
my god,I just had a great idea for a screenplay.
Marshall...
Marshall...
她不是幽灵!
she was not a ghost!
我知道她不是幽灵
I know that she wasn't a ghost.
她把花球拿起来了,说明她有肉体
She picked up a bouquet,proving she had corporeal form.
等等!
Wait,wait!
她坐在伴娘的对面
She was sitting across from a couple
of bridesmaids.
她一定在那桌
She must've been at their table.
也许她们知道她是谁
Maybe they know who she was.
太好了
Great.
所以我们怎么找到伴娘呢?
So how do we get in touch with the bridesmaids?
这太棒了
this better be good
我快飞上天堂了
I am about to enter Nirvana.
顺便说下, 我应该给你涅磐的电♥话♥
By the way,I should get you Nirvana's
phone number.
她按♥摩♥太棒了
She gives a great massage.
说什么?!
Say what?!
Barney!
Barney!
我知道这的规矩
I know the house rules.
Es un chiste!
Es un chiste!
听着, Barney
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
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