老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）

How I Met Your Mother S01E02

Part 2 Aug. 2, 2021, 11:11 p.m.

好的，我的计划好了
OK, I got it all planned out.
她走进门来
She steps through the door.
Ted在哪儿？并不是焦急的等候在门口
And where is Ted? Not eagerly wait by the door.
我在房♥子的另一边，给一个惹火的姑娘展示我的建筑画图的工具
Now I'm across the room at my drafting table showing some foxy young thing all my cool architecture stuff.
Robin走了过来，我很随性的跟她说……
So Robin throws her over and I casually give her one of these.
嘿，你好啊
Hey, what's up?
然后她说，嘿，地方不错啊
She says, 'hey,nice place. etc. etc.'
然后我再说
Then I say,
那就别客气，把这里当你自己家吧
'well, make yourself at home.'
然后我就很随性的重新和别人聊天去了
And I casually return to my conversation.
接着，一个小时后
Then, an hour later,
哦，你还在啊
'oh, you're still here?'
我很不经意的这么说
I say, like I don't really care.
不过这也是个不错的开头,然后，我非常随性的……
But it's a nice surprise and then very casually,
向上房♥顶看看吗？
'wanna see the roof?'
-房♥顶……-带上房♥顶后，房♥顶会帮我料理好一切的
-The roof!-You got to run up to the roof. And the roof takes care of the rest.
这房♥顶有什么特别的
What's so special about the roof?
哦，月亮，星光，朦胧的远景
Oh, the moon, stars, the shimmering skylight.
在那个房♥顶上，你不可能不陷入爱河
You cannot fall in love on that roof.
我们还在上面“玩”过几次
We do it up there sometimes.
计划很周详，我的小朋友
Solid plan, my little friend.
我们身高差不多……
We were the same plate.
不过让我提个小小的改动
But may I suggest one little modification?
和你聊天的那个惹火的MM把她带上房♥顶去，两个人干柴烈火
That foxy young thing that you were chatting up? Take her up to the roof and have sex with her,
-疯狂的猴猴姿势……-这不是原计划！
-crazy monkey style..-That's not the plan!
这才应该是原计划,你瞧瞧她
That should be the plan. I mean, look at her!
Ted，你瞧瞧她,惹火的都冒烟了
Ted, look at her! She's smoking!
谢谢
Thank you!
但她不是Robin
But she's not Robin.
这就是问题所在,Ted，你听我说
Exactly. Ted, let's rap.
统计学上来讲，在纽约的每一个派对上都会有这样一个小妞，她根本不知道这是谁开的派对
Statistic. At every New York party, there's always a girl who has no idea who's party she's at.
她根本不认识你周围的任何人,你也不会再见到她第二次了
She knows no one you know and you will never see her again.
你明白……我的意思吗,这个提议怎么样？
Do you see where I'm going? How is this?
Barney，我不这么觉得……
Barney, I don't think so.
潜望中……
Scoping.
继续潜望……
Scoping.
天啊，你真口耐
Man, you are a dork.
目标锁定
Target acquired.
现在我们来玩个小游戏,我愿意称之为……
And now it's time we play a little game I'd like to call'have you met Ted.'
-“你见过Ted吗？”-哦，别这样，又来……
-'have you met Ted.'-Oh, come on. Not this.
嗨，你见过Ted没有？
Hi, have you met Ted?
没有
No.
-你好-你好
Hi.Hi.
你认识Marshal和Lily吗？
You know Marshal and Lily?
不认识
No.
这个派对里面你都认识谁啊？
Do you know anyone at this party?
我和Carlos一起来的
I work with Carlos.
稍等……
Excuse me.
你们谁认识Carlos？
Anyone know a Carlos?
不认识
No.
银质大盘送上的……大肥肉
On a silver platter bone appetite.
我不这么想
I don't think so.
你放弃，我上场
You are loss or gain.
对不起，我能带你去看看♥房♥♥顶吗？
Excuse me, can I show you the roof?
-上面的美景很迷人-好啊
-It's magical up there.
-Sure.
等等，嘿，房♥顶我预订了
Wait. Hey, I got that roof reserved.
Robin不会来了
Dude, Robin's not coming.
嘿，她会出现的！
She'll show up.
她会来的
Hey, she's going to show up.
她没有来
She didn't show up.
至少我们开了一个很棒的派对
At least it was a great party.
我吃完了4大罐调味酱
I ate, like, 4 cans of dip.
你总是知道怎么安慰我，老朋友
You always know what to say, old friend.
是Robin
It's Robin.
-接啊-不不不，我不能马上接
-Answer it.
-No, not right away.
我要显得随性一些
I got to seem casual.
喂
Hello.
真的很抱歉，我错过了你的派对
I'm so sorry I missed your party.
你是哪位？Meredith？
Who's this? Meredith?
Robin
Robin.
哦，Robin，嘿,是啊是啊
Oh, Robin! Hey, yeah.
看样子你没能来，是不？
I guess you never showed up, did you?
没有，我被工作缠住了,不过……
No, I got stuck at work but
他们总算把那小孩从机器里弄出来了
they finally got that kid out of the cream machine.
他能保留那个紫色的长颈鹿吗？
Did he get to keep the purple giraffe?
是的，那孩子可以拿走全部的玩具
Yeah, they let him keep all the toys.
他困在里面太久了,都热出疹子了
He was in there a long time and little kids have small bladders.
真希望你的派对是今天就好了
I wish your party was tonight.
没错，派对就是今晚
It is. The party's tonight.
是啊，这个派对要开两天,这才是我们的风格
Yeah, it's a two-day party. Because that's how we roll.
所以，你想不想顺道来玩玩,随性就好
So, if you want to swing by? You know, it's casual.
今晚见
See ya.
是Robin打来的
So that was Robin.
-你为什么这么做，我还有一篇论文要写呢-我知道，我很抱歉，这很糟糕
-What are you doing to me? I've got a paper to write.
-I know. I'm sorry it's terrible.
-我会给你买♥♥更多的调味酱的-Ted!
-I'll buy more dip.
-Ted!
Ted，等等！！
Ted, wait!
我要法国洋葱口味的！
Get French onion.
你看这个人，我还有论文要写呢
Can you believe this guy? I've got a paper to write.
好吧好吧，但一定要迅速完事
OK, fine. But it's got to be like super quick
而且事后也不能有拥抱
and no cuddling after.
我是最幸运的女孩儿……
I'm the luckiest girl alive.
你说的房♥顶真是太对了
You were so right about the roof.
那房♥顶，那房♥顶是超级催化剂
The roof, the roof is on fire, Ted.
昨晚那小妞……
The girl from last night
我把她带回家了，今天早上送她出来,带着绕了几圈，接着送她走了
I took her back to my place then this morning took her outside, spun her around a couple of times, and sent her walking.
她绝对找不到回来的路了,而她就在那儿！
She will never find her way back and there she is!
她怎么过来的，你邀请她来了？
How did she get here? Did you inviter her?
我不认识她
I've no idea who that is.
她说她是和Carlos一起来的，Carlos是谁？
She said she worked with Carlos. Who's Carlos?
我不知道谁是Carlos
I don't know any Carlos.
嗨，是你啊
Hi, you.
你回来了
You're back.
当然了
I sure am.
来吧，亲爱的，我想喝两杯
Come on, sweetie, I need to drink.
亲爱的？真的？
Sweetie? Really?
哦，兔子们，别这样,房♥顶我预订了
Oh, rabbits, come on! I got that roof reserved.
我和“和Carlos一起来”的小妞的关系吹了
So it's over between me and worked-with-Carlos girl.
哦，很快啊
Oh, that was fast.
是啊，我一直在找一个甩掉刚认识的小妞的办法
Yeah, I was trying to think what's the quickest way to get rid of a girl you just met.
-我想我爱上你了-什么？
-I think I'm in love with you.
-What?
谢谢你，伙计
Thanks, bro.
我很乐意帮忙
Glad I could help.
怎么……
What the ...
不不不，不能这样！
What the ...
对不起，Ted
Sorry, Ted.
太好了，现在Robin来了我怎么办？
Wait, what I'm going to do when Robin shows up?
她会来的！
She'll show up.
她没有来
She didn't show up.
现在好了，我们开了两场派对
Alright, we threw two parties.
每个人都开心了
Everybody had fun.
每个人都享受了，每个人都舒坦了
Everybody wanned. Everybody chant.
现在小孩子该干正事了
And now the kid's got to get to work.
而且这个小孩子不能被打搅,跟我一起说
And the kid is not to be disturbed. Repeat after me
我不会和Marshal嘿♥咻♥
I will not have sex with Marshal.
我不会和Marshal嘿♥咻♥
I will not have sex with Marshal.
Robin打来的
It's Robin.
喂
Hello.
-嗨，Ted？-Amanda？