老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S05E05
Part 3
Oct. 23, 2020, 10:04 a.m.
- 什么比赛? - 多伦多枫叶队对埃德蒙顿呀
Beauchemin went five hole in OT.
Beauchemin打加时赛时进了五个
- Oh,I guess I missed it. - Oh,sorry. You're American. Here's your change.
- 我错过了那场 - 不好意思 你是美国人哦 找你的钱
I'm not American.
我不是美国人
American money? Didn't watch the Leafs game?
用美元? 不看枫叶队比赛?
No "please" or "thank you" for the coffee?
买♥♥咖啡不说"请"或者"谢谢"?
You sure don't seem like a Canadian.
我敢说你肯定不是个加拿大人哦
What's wrong?
有什么问题?
Other than the fact that this five-dollar bill they gave you is blue.
除了她们找给你的五块钱是蓝色之外
I'm not American, and apparently, I'm not Canadian either.
我不是美国人 显然也不是加拿大人
And there's kids playing hockey on the back.
还有 背面居然有几个孩子在玩冰球
It's like you want us to make fun of you.
这不是逼我们取笑你们吗
I don't want this anymore.
我不想再这样了
Dude,don't look at it. That's a rookie mistake.
伙计 别看直接吃就好啦 这是新手必犯的错误
We shouldn't have left Lily.
我们不该抛下Lily
Well,if you're so worried, why don't you give her a call?
你要这么担心的话 打电♥话♥给她呗?
I have. I left her,like,20 messages.
打过了 我给她 差不多留了20条口信
I said,"I'm sorry. Please forgive me. It's all Ted's fault!"
我说"对不起 请原谅我 这全是Ted的错!"
- What exactly is "Ted's fault"? - This! This whole thing!
- 什么叫 "Ted的错"? - 这些事! 这所有的事!
We were having a perfectly nice trip, and then you kidnapped me.
我们正开开心心的旅行 然后你绑♥架♥了我
You didn't even let me put on underwear!
甚至连内♥裤♥都没让我穿上!
We never used to put on underwear!
我们从来没有穿内♥裤♥的习惯!
That was the fun of a bro's trip to Gazzola's!
这才是这次兄弟旅行 去Gazzola's比萨店的乐趣所在啊!
We left everything, and everyone behind.
我们撇下所有事情 所有人
It was just you and me!
只有你和我!
But now it's like you've disappeared into Lily.
而现在 你就像迷失在Lily的温柔乡里
- That is not true. - It is true.
- 不是这样的 - 就是这样
You're not upset because you're worried she's mad.
只要担心着她会不会发怒你就不心烦
You're upset because you'd rather be with her, eating muffins than here with me, eating this delicious...
你宁愿跟她一起吃松饼 现在却心烦意乱 因为在跟我享受这美味的...
I think one of my mushrooms just crawled away.
我好像见到上面的蘑菇在蠕动
Well,you know what? That mushroom's not the only thing that's leaving.
知道吗? 不止那颗蘑菇要离开
Car keys,please.
车钥匙 谢谢
Look at this money!
看看这些硬币!
This one has a moose, this one has a beaver, and they all have Elton John on the back.
这个有只驼鹿 这个有只海狸 而背面都有艾尔顿约翰
When I moved to the States, I swore to myself, I wasn't going to change.
当我移居美国时 我向自己发誓 我不会改变
And yet,here I am,in the most Canadian place in the universe-- Tim Horton's--
而现在 我在全世界最有加拿大味的地方 Tim Horton's(加拿大快餐品牌)
around the corner from the Hockey Hall of Fame, and I don't belong.
正在冰球名人堂的拐角 而我却没有归属感了
It's like I don't have a country.
就好像我没有祖国那样
Okay,that's it.
够了
Attention,Canada!
听着 加拿大! (小Barney的地图攻击开始...)
I am Barney from America.
我是Barney 来自美国
And I'm here to fix your backward-ass country.
我是来拯救你们这狗屁倒灶的国家的
Number one: get real money.
第一 搞点真钱用吧
Don't know what board game this came from,but it's a "jhoke."
我不管这棋盘游戏是哪个国家发明的 但这是个"杯具"
Number two-- and this is the biggie--
第二 而这个很重要
Quit letting awesome chicks like Robin Scherbatsky get away because,guess what?
别再放过像Robin Scherbatsky 这种辣妹了 知道吗?
You don't want her?I'm planting my flag in her--
你们不想要她? 那我就在她身上插枝旗
if you know what I mean, which you probably don't--
希望你们懂我意思吧 当然很可能你们不懂
and getting her the hell out of here.
再把她带走
You may now return to being pointless.
继续你们无聊的人生吧
Ah,this coffee is excellent.
哦 这咖啡真不错
Hey,fellas.
嘿 兄弟
It's called a "tie""
这玩意儿叫"领带"
Sparky was my best friend,
Sparky是我的好朋友
but after I married Helen, old Spark started to feel a little left out.
但在我娶了Helen之后 老Spark开始有点低落
For so long, it had been just me and him,
这么长时间以来 一直都是我和它一起
but now he suddenly felt like Helen had taken his place.
而现在他觉得Helen突然间取代了他
What Sparky didn't realize was, even though I loved Helen, I still loved him,too.
Sparky不知道 虽然我爱Helen 但我还是爱它的
I had room in my heart for both of them.
我的心始终装着他们俩
But maybe I should have put aside some special ball-tossing time
可我应该腾出点时间陪它玩玩球
just for the two of us to make sure Sparky knew that he was a good boy.
给彼此 让Sparky知道我心里还是有它的
I wish now I had, 'cause old Sparky ran out in front of a Cadillac
我真希望我早点这么做 因为老Sparky被一部凯迪拉克撞倒
and got splattered like a watermelon in one of them Gallagher shows.
像Gallagher秀里的西瓜那样飞溅开
- I'm sorry,Ted! - I'm sorry! No,I'm sorry.
- 对不起 Ted! - 对不起 不 是我对不起你
I-I never should have been mad at you!
我不该生你气的!
No,I never should have brought Lily.
不 我不该带Lily来的
She pees all the time, even at the apartment.
她老是要尿尿 即使在家里也是
Still bros?
还是哥们不?
Best bros.
铁哥们
Hey,you want to crank some Van Halen just like old times?
嘿 想要像以前那样听范·海伦乐队吗?
Hells,yeah!
当然!
Or listen to the Sparky book again?
或者再听一遍这Sparky的书?
- Listen to the Sparky book again. - Okay. Let's listen to it again.
- 听Sparky的书吧 - 好 再来一遍
Man,those Canadian doctors bandaged me up, reset my jaw,
老天 那些加拿大医生把我包扎起来 装好下巴
put my shoulder back in its socket, and they didn't even bill me. Idiots.
再帮我把肩膀移好位 居然没给我开账单 一群白♥痴♥嘛 (加拿大医疗免费滴)
All right, I guess they're not idiots.
好啦 他们没那么白♥痴♥
The coffee was extraordinary.
那里的咖啡真的很棒
I guess Canada's not so bad.
我想加拿大没我想象中那么差
They play their cards right, maybe they can even become a state someday.
要是他们干得好 说不定真的能成为一个州呢
Barney,I've thought about this.
Barney 我想过了
When you stood up and told off those people, I thought,"Yeah, America's cool"" .
那时你站起来说教那些人 我就在想 "美国也挺酷嘛"
And then when those guys pounded the stuffing out of you,
后来那些人猛锤你的时候
I thought,"Yeah,Canada's pretty cool,too."
我就想"加拿大也挺酷的"
In fact,after you passed out, I-I may have taken a few pokes myself.
事实上 你晕过去之后 我也偷袭了你几下
So,I've decided, dual citizenship.
所以我决定了 做双重公民
I'm going to be American and Canadian.
我要同时做美国人和加拿大人
- Wait,you can do that? - Yeah,dummy.
- 等等 这样可以? - 当然 小傻瓜
Instead of being a woman with no country, I'm going to be a woman with two.
比起做一个无国之人 我宁愿成为两国公民
I see.
我懂了(我看到了)
You understand?
你能理解?
No,I can see out of my left eye again.
不 我是说我能用左眼看东西了
- Hey,baby? Baby? - Yeah?
- 嘿 宝贝? 宝贝? - 怎么了?
I'm so sorry that we left you.
我们抛弃了你 对不起
Did you go somewhere,sweetie?
你去了哪里 亲爱的?
Yes,kids,it turns out Crumpet Manor had pampered Lily into a nearly comatose state of relaxation.
没错 孩子 看来Crumpet庄园 让Lily陷入一种昏昏欲睡的放松状态
She didn't even notice we were gone.
她甚至没意识到我们走了
Yeah...
爽...
So,I had a great time,too.
我也很开心呀
That's good. And I'm so sorry you didn't get any pizza.
那就好 对不起没给你带比萨
Oh,that's okay.
没事啦
And if she didn't mean it then, she certainly meant it 19 minutes later.
要是现在她言不由衷的话 19分钟后就是真心实意的了
God,my stomach! Damn you,Gazzola's!
我的肚子! 去死吧 Gazzola's比萨店!
It's like a hot ball of lead!
就好像胃里有个火烫的球!
Baby,cut it out of me. Cut it out!
宝贝 快割掉它 割掉它!
That was a wild trip,huh,Ted?
好一个旅行啊 是吧? Ted
I know. It was kind of crazy.
就是 太疯狂了
But how great is it to drink some Tantrum again?
不过能再喝到Tantrum多棒
You know who had fun,was Lily.
知道谁最开心吗 是Lily
Lily drank,like,four cans of the stuff. Right,Lil?
Lily好像喝了四罐这东西 是吧? Lil
- Where's Lily? - Tantrum!
- Lily呢? - Tantrum!
I have to pee.
我要尿尿
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
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