邓肯小镇

Duncanville S01E08

Part 4 July 2, 2020, 11:38 a.m.

I got a bunch of misprinted T-shirts.
孩子们快出来
Kids, get out of there.
你们违法了
You're breaking the law,
你们不到一小时前才吃过东西
and you ate less than an hour ago.
抱歉妈妈
Sorry, Mom.
这个故事将会以我们裸体收场
This story ends with us being naked.
我要为了我的核心信仰而脱衣
I will prune for my core beliefs.
我会为了正确的事业而拼命
Yeah, your boy will always drop draws for the right cause.
知道吗把这句话印在T恤上
You know what? Put that on a shirt.
我穿了牛仔裤因为我身材不好
I have my jeans on because I have body issues,
但我同样愤怒
but I share their outrage.
我不会被几个中产小孩而吓到
I will not be intimidated by middle-class children.
上帝创造了这个天堂
God created this paradise
好让我开卡丁车和我的成人朋友比赛
for me to race my adult friends in go-karts.
你如果打开开关你会后悔的
You flip that switch, ya gonna regret it.
安妮
Oh, Annie.
你比任何人都了解司法系统
You know the justice system better than anyone.
有钱人从不会承担后果
Rich people never suffer consequences.
变♥态♥ 变♥态♥
Perv, perv!
变♥态♥ 变♥态♥ 变♥态♥
Perv, perv, perv!
变♥态♥ 变♥态♥ 变♥态♥
Perv, perv, perv.
我不确定这是不是正确的事业
Okay, ya boy is not sure this is the right cause.
我好讨厌我的肩膀
I hate my shoulders so much.
打住挺好看的
Stop. They're nice.
我来这是要完成任务的我绝不退缩
I came here to do a job, and I'm doing it.
没错它们大小不一
That's right. They're different sizes.
快点审判吧安妮法官
Make your ruling fast, Judge Annie.
我们没有打码的预算
We don't have the budget to pixelate.
天啊天啊
Oh, God, oh, God.
肃静
Silence!
松鼠人
The Squirrel Man.
他真实存在
He is real.
怎么样啊谢谢前来
How's it going? Thanks for coming.
好啊
'Sup.
我在这生活了五十年
I've lived here for 50 years,
静静看着小孩们
peacefully watching teenagers skinny-dip
跟我的松鼠妻子裸泳
with my squirrel wife,
吃着留给我的食物
and eating the treats left for me,
就像圣诞老人享用他的饼干一样
much like Santa Claus enjoying his cookies.
我从没想过
I never thought I'd see a day
这样一个和平的地方会爆发冲突
that this peaceful place would see such conflict.
如果我从我的孤独中学会了什么的话
If I've learned one thing from my solitude,
那就是生活的意义是...
it's that the meaning of life is--
五十年
50 years?
那就是说你有不动产权
Well, that means you have squatter's rights.
你是说那个老怪胎拥有这块地吗
Are you saying that old weirdo owns this land?
是的根据时效占有法
Yes, under the laws of adverse possession,
也就是说他有权决定这块地的用途
which means he gets to decide what the land is used for.
你什么想法松鼠人
What's it gonna be, Squirrel Man?
我决定我又大又漂亮的厕所得留下
I say, my big, beautiful toilet stays!
抱歉拉杜什但你咬罪
Sorry, LaDouche, but ya guilpy.
咬罪咬罪咬罪
Guilpy, guilpy, guilpy!
T恤谁想要T恤
T-shirts! Who wants a T-shirt?
我们能要加加大号♥吗
Can we all have an extra, extra large?
谢谢妈妈我们爱你
Thanks, Mom! We love you!
收到孩子们
Copy that, kids.
你挑战了司法系统还获胜了邓肯
You took on the system and won, Duncan.
我要出去了因为那人在这里面拉屎
Hey, I'm gonna get out now, 'cause that guy poops in here.
嗯他很聪明但也很恶心
Yeah. He's wise, but he's gross.
于是小孩子们度过了一个愉快的夏天
And so the children had a wonderful summer,
我见证了每一刻
and I watched every moment of it.
跟性无关你怎么回事你不是很酷吗
Not sexually. What's your deal? I thought you were cool.
安妮不再是法官了晚安
Oh, and Annie's no longer a judge. Good night.
原告要起诉她父母
The plaintiff is suing her parents
不遵守买♥♥狗的承诺
for reneging on promise of dog.
好谁要先骗我
All right, who's gonna lie to me first?
那个[井] 法官大人
Well, Your Honor--
井是用来装饮用水的
Wells are for drinking water.
法官大人我们从没说过
Your Honor, we never actually said--
闭嘴静你父母是否告诉你
Zip it. Jing, did your parents tell you
他们会给你买♥♥只狗
that they were gonna get you a dog?
似的感觉是口头契约
Yes. It felt like a verbal contract.
伯德拿一箱小狗来
Byrd, bring me a box of puppies.
你想要多少都行亲爱的
Take as many as you want, sweetie.
我全都要
Oh! I'll take all of them.
可是朱迪法官我们只说会买♥♥一只的
But Judge Judy, the discussion was for one.
也就是说确实有承诺过
Oh, so there was a discussion.
该死她真厉害
Damn it. She's good.
你是骗子你咬罪
You're a liar, and you're guilpy.
法庭判决静胜诉
The court rules in favor of Jing.
朱迪法官想要去打击犯罪吗
Hey, Judge Judy, want to fight crime?
当然
Hell yeah!
我爱你静
I love you, Jing.
我也爱你们等等这是梦吗
I love you, too--oh, wait. Is this a dream?
我以为快艇已经提示得够明显了
I thought the speedboat gave it away.