邓肯小镇

邓肯小镇
第一季 第五集
妈妈
Mommy!
-邓肯 -邓肯
- Duncan! - Duncan!
食堂只有不到20美元
别忘了周一前要交关于你们最爱战争的论文
Yo, don't forget your papers are due Monday about your favorite war,
别直接抄袭维♥基♥百♥科♥
and don't just plagiarize Wikipedia.
-每四个字 -就重新排序
- Rearrange... - Every fourth word.
我要写朝鲜战争 你们写什么
I'm doing the Korean War. What wars are you guys doing?
-星战 -仓库淘宝大战
- Star. - Storage.
-杯形蛋糕战争 -推特战争
- Cupcake. - Twitter.
Nicki Minaj对Cardi B
Nicki Minaj versus Cardi B.
永不忘记
Never forget.
这怎么会是蓝♥丝♥带♥学校
How is this a Blue Ribbon school?
不是的 我只是在我女友来看我的时候
Oh, it's not. I just wrote that on the door
写在门上
when my girlfriend came to visit.
好了 下课
Okay, class dismissed.
下课
Class dismissed!
这只小猪一直叫着"喂喂喂"
And this little piggy went "Wee-wee-wee" all the way--
明天继续
We'll finish this tomorrow.
发生了什么
Ah. What happened?
搞错没有
Come on!
她用斧头一遍又一遍重击他
She whacked him with the axe over and over again,
但他就是不死
but he refused to die.
她把他拖进厨房♥ 他眼睁睁看着
She dragged him into the kitchen where he watched
自己的腿被塞进绞肉机
as she shoved his leg through a meat grinder.
我的天
Oh, my God.
晚餐吃肉糜糕是个好主意
Meatloaf for dinner would be amazing.
妈妈
Mommy!
你去哪了
Where were you?
快开走 趁没人看到我
Drive before someone sees me.
别告诉你老师我跟你说了
Don't tell your teacher I told you,
但是那只猪最后回家了
but the pig was going all the way home.
真好
Good for him.
好了 大家说说今天都怎么过的
All right, let's hear about everybody's day.
谁先来 邓肯
Who wants to go first? Duncan?
科学老师打了一个学生
Science teacher punched a kid.
你呢 爸爸 你在马桶镇的生活怎么样
How 'bout you, Dad? How's life in Toilet Town.
我掏马桶可是为了养你们
Hey, what I pull out of toilets puts food on this table.
其他人说 安妮
Somebody else talk. Annie.
好 我看到一辆车
Okay, so I see this car
开着闪光灯停在装卸区
parked in a loading zone with its flashers on,
但我可不傻
but I wasn't fooled.
我拿出我的罚单本子
I pull out my ticket pad and--
-杰克 -马上去 继续讲
- Jack. - On it. Keep talking.
那人声称他是在给他生病的孩子买♥♥药
Okay, so the guy claims he was getting medicine for his sick kid,
但我训练有素的眼睛注意到
but my highly trained eye notices that
后面没有儿童座椅
there's no child seat in the back of--
我受够了和那冰箱竞争了 杰克
I'm tired of competing with that fridge, Jack.
你没有竞争
You're not competing.
我全神贯注地在听你说话
You have my undivided attention,
告诉我们医生说你的脚怎么了
so tell us what the doctor said was wrong with your foot.
它又来追我了
It's after me again!
没有 冰箱只是很爱你
No, the fridge just loves you.
回去 你个混♥蛋♥
Get back here, you son of a bitch!
杰克 这冰箱已经买♥♥了20年了 我们需要一台新的
Jack, that fridge is 20 years old. We need a new one.
不 我们不需要
No, we don't.
这是我们一起买♥♥的第一件家电
This was the first appliance we bought together.
它是这个家的一部分
It's part of the family.
冰箱是变胖了吗
Um, is the fridge getting fatter?
可能该换小苏打了
It's probably just time to change the baking soda.
孩子们
Kids!
我永远不会放手 杰克
I'll never let go, Jack.
我永远不会换冰箱
I'll never replace the fridge.
别吃冰箱残渣
Don't fill up on the fridge sludge.
我在街上待得太久
Ooh, I spend so much time on the street,
我都忘了建筑还有内部
I forget buildings have insides.
这桶枪只要35块 我能买♥♥点吗
This barrel of guns is only 35 bucks. Can I get some?
-如果你除草的话 -算了
- If you mow the lawn and-- - Ugh, forget it.
不 海瑟
Oh, no. Heather.
我要被看到和家人一起购物
I'm gonna be seen shopping with my family.
不 金伯莉
Hmm? Oh, no, Kimberly.
我要被看到和家人一起购物
I'm gonna be seen shopping with my family.
你不说我就不说
I won't tell if you don't.
等等 我看不到家电
Wait, I can't see the appliances.
把我抬上你肩膀 杰克
Put me on your shoulders, Jack.
好 电视 雪地轮胎
Okay, TVs, snow tires,
可疑的眼镜商 未予束缚的考拉
dubious optician, loose koalas.
家电
Appliances, bam.
位于婴儿床和棺材区左侧五公里处
Five clicks to the left across from Cribs n' Caskets.
不像我们家的 这款内部有灯
Unlike ours, this one actually has a light inside.
而且很冷
Ah, and it's cold!
这台有制冰机
Whoa, this one has an ice maker.
谁在乎 我喜欢从加油站买♥♥的袋装冰块
Who cares? I like my ice in a bag from the gas station.
你好 我是珍妮
Hi, I'm Janine.
你们是想买♥♥冰箱吗
Are you folks looking for a fridge?
是的 我们很久没买♥♥过了
Yes, it's been a while since we purchased one.
你有什么推荐 珍妮
What do you suggest, Janine?
让我来向你们介绍这款康威的
Let me introduce you to the high-tech fridge
未来高科技冰箱
of the future from Convee.
有无线网 内部还有摄像头
It has Wi-Fi and a camera inside
当你在商店的时候 你能看到你牛奶是否喝光
so when you're at the store you can see if you're out of milk
或者食物是否过期
or if food is expired.
食物还能过期
Food expires?
还有颜色编码的日历
It also has a color-coded calendar
以及互相留言的留言板
and a message board to leave each other notes.
你想在冰箱上留言吗
Would you like to leave a note on the fridge?
别忘了足球课后来接我
我们从不会忘记
We don't forget!
爸爸 足球课是哪天
Um, Dad, what day is soccer?
周二 六 四
Tue-Sun-Thursday.
是周五 我不得不搭便车回家
It's Friday. I had to hitchhike home.
你可以从冰箱上叫车
You can call an Uber from the fridge.
这些演示很影响我的生活 珍妮
These demonstrations affect my life, Janine.
-我想要这太冰箱 杰克 -等等
- I want this fridge, Jack. - Hang on.
我们不需要这些高科技玩意
We don't need all this high-tech crap.
只需要冷冻食品
It just has to keep stuff cold
骄傲展出我们的磁铁收藏就好
and proudly display our magnet collection.
我们有两个大峡谷国家公园的
We've got two from the Grand Canyon.
在那呢
There it is!
珍妮 它是有一些很酷的功能
Okay, Janine, it has some cool features,
但我跟我们家的老冰箱有情感纽带
but I have an emotional bond with our old fridge
坚不可摧
that can never be broken.
你的马尾辫和我不在乎人们看法的
That ponytail and "I don't care what people think"
时尚感让我知道你喜欢摇滚 对吗 杰克
fashion sense tells me you're a rocker, Jack. Am I right?
我确实希望我能在变老前死掉
Well, I do hope I die before I get old.
看看这个
Check this out.
我不在乎我的坏名声
♪ I don't give a damn about my bad reputation ♪
我们必须买♥♥下这冰箱
♪ We have to get this refrigeration ♪
我们要了 等等 静呢
We'll take it! Wait, where's Jing?
这个婴儿床有屋顶
This crib has a roof!
你们俩能看着你们妹妹吗
Will you two watch your sister?
-忙着呢 -嘘 在睡觉
- Busy. - Shh. Sleeping.
所有人都从棺材出来
Everybody out of the caskets!
你们得知道这是我的噩梦
You have to know this is my nightmare.
你会没事吗
Are you gonna be okay?
是啊 爸 你需要帮助吗
Yeah, Dad, do you need any help?
谢谢 不过
Thanks, guys, but, uh,
应该由它最好的朋友下手
his best friend should do it.
没错 就该放在厨房♥
Oh, yeah, the kitchen was definitely the right room for it.
你好 我的新家人 该给我取名字了
Hello, new family. Time to name me.
我想到了 冰冰
I got it. Fridgy.