邓肯小镇

Duncanville S01E04

Part 3 March 27, 2020, 10:44 a.m.

Oh, you know I want funnel cake!
行你可以吃点漏斗蛋糕
Fine, you can have some funnel cake
-然后我们再去偷女巫 -耶
- and then we steal the witch. - Yay!
我觉得这计划能行
I think this is gonna work.
这太赞了
This is brilliant.
如果小镇要再去找个处子
Now if the town finds another virgin
去烧死那就会是我
to set the witch on fire, it'll be me!
贝克丝你考虑得不周全
Aw, Bex, you didn't think this through.
女巫
Okay, witch,
永远埋藏我的秘密
bury my secret forever.
女巫不见了
The witch is gone!
什么样的恶魔会偷女巫
What kinda evil person would steal a witch?
女巫
A witch!
没有了雕像女巫节就不能正式开始对吗是的
Without our effigy, Witch Day can't officially begin, can it? Nope.
取消辣椒酱烹饪比赛关掉玉米热狗摊位
No chili cook-off, close the corndog booth,
关掉魔鬼之轮
shut down the Devil's Wheel.
全都关掉
Shut it all down!
-我的辣椒酱 -我的女巫混音
- My chili! - My witch mix!
我的芥末帅哥
My Mustard Boy!
如果我不烧点什么的话我会疯掉的
If I don't burn something, I'm gonna lose my mind!
我们不能让偷女巫者
We can't let a witch stealer
偷走我们即将获奖的辣椒酱雷声
steal our soon-to-be-award-winning chili thunder!
年轻人如果你不告诉我真的女巫在哪的话
Young man, if you do not tell me where the real witch is,
我发誓我会点燃你
I swear I will light you on fire.
哈里斯夫人是我贝克丝
Mrs. Harris, it's me, Bex!
贝克丝
Oh, Bex!
如果你不告诉我真的女巫在哪的话
If you don't tell me where the real witch is,
我发誓我会点燃你
I swear I will light you on fire.
是邓肯我不知道他们去哪了
It was Duncan! I don't know where they went!
妈妈
Mommy!
好了静去找你哥哥
All right, Jing. Go find your brother.
他在那边
He's that way!
我们得找到他
We've got to find him!
完美逃逸
Clean getaway.
我用树枝清理了我们的踪迹
I wiped our tracks away with a tree branch
在好几处灌木丛里撒尿迷惑他们
and peed on several bushes to throw them off the trail.
这不是我第一次逃亡了
This isn't my first getaway.
米娅计划下一步是什么
Okay, Mia, what's the next part of the plan?
等到小镇
Just wait it out until the town
找到发怒的新事物
finds something new to be mad about.
奥克戴尔女巫被小镇新处子绑♥架♥
"Oakdale Witch Kidnapped by New Town Virgin.
愤怒民众发誓要生气一辈子
Angry Mob Vows To Be Mad For Rest of Lives."
这个小镇的愤怒问题真的很严重
This town has some real anger issues.
我讨厌死了
I hate it so much!
我的天我得搬走
Oh, my God. I have to move.
他们还提到了我们
Hey, they mentioned us too.
他们就可能的处子之身按顺序给我们做了排序
They ranked us in order of probable virginity.
你不会相信谁是第三名
You won't believe who number three is.
-是我吗 -是的
- Is it me? - Yes.
我们永远都回不去了
We can never go back.
我们得在这里开始新生活
We have to start a new life here.
一个新的社会就像丧尸末日之后
A new society, like after a zombie apocalypse.
捅死爽
Stab, dead! Yeah!
你是在世的最性感的丧尸杀手邓肯
You're the sexiest zombie slayer alive, Duncan.
说点我不知道的事
Tell me something I don't know,
能看到我黑暗外表下善良一面的性感女孩
hot girl who sees the good man beneath my dark side.
不邓肯你被咬了
Oh, no, Duncan, you've been bit.
我们最好赶紧亲热
Yeah, we'd better make out quick
不然你的肉体将脱落吃了我的大脑
before your flesh falls off and you eat my brains.
乐意至极
With pleazh.
邓肯有人想进来
Duncan, somebody's trying to get in!
是丧尸吗
Zombies?
是你的性感老妈还有配不上她的那个男人
It's your hot mom and that guy she's too good for.
阿邓开门
Dunkie! Open up!
你没有闯祸儿子
You're not in trouble, son!
女巫节是个野蛮的传统我们为你骄傲
Witch Day is a barbaric tradition and we're proud of you!
是时候有人终结它了
It's time somebody ended it!
谢天谢地我们担心死了
Oh, thank God, we were worried sick
担心辣椒酱烹饪比赛被取消
about the chili cook-off being cancelled.
铐住他杰克
Cuff him, Jack-o.
再感叹一次你的演技太棒了
Again, your acting is-- is simply amazing.
好样的
Good work.
抱歉邓肯这鼻子是我最大的才能
Sorry, Duncan, this nose is my greatest strength
也是我最大的弱点
and my greatest weakness.
带走他杰克
Take him away, Jack-o.
我们抓到女巫了
We got the witch!
还有处子女巫节回来啦
And the virgin! Witch Day is back on!
邓肯整座小镇...
Duncan! The whole town's--
算了你懂的
oh, never mind. You know.
你们怎么能这么对我
Ugh, how could you do this to me?
当你有了自己的小孩
Someday when you have kids of your own
你想赢得辣椒酱比赛的时候
and you really wanna win a chili competition,
你就会明白了
then you'll understand.
我们做到了女巫节回来啦
We did it! Witch Day is back on!
因为他是个好处子
* For he's a jolly good virgin *
因为他是个好处子
* For he's a jolly good virgin *
人人都拒绝了他
* Who everyone has denied
履行你的职责邓肯
Do your duty, Duncan.
处子处子
Virgin! Virgin!
处子处子
Virgin! Virgin!
他会永远是我们的处子
He'll be our virgin forever!
永远
Forever!
可怜的邓肯这太糟了
Oh, poor Duncan! This is horrible.
我将没有孙子
I'll have no grandchildren.
不杰克我们干了什么
Oh, no, Jack. What have we done?
你们指控我是处子
You're accusing me of being a virgin,
你们的指控是对的
and your accusations are correct,
但是那些被错误指控
but what about all the people
最后被烧掉的人呢
with false accusations that were burned?
女巫节是错的
Witch Day is wrong.
我记不住所有的原因了
I can't remember all the reasons why,
但是米娅可以告诉你们
but Mia can tell you.
不我们喜欢我们被误导的信仰
No, we love our misguided beliefs!
别想开导我们
Don't you try to enlighten us!
我们就喜欢做蠢人烧东西
We love being dumb and burning stuff!
那或许是时候你们被"烧"了
Then maybe it's time you got burned.
我要读你们最黑暗的秘密
I'm gonna read your darkest secrets.
他在虚张声势
He's bluffing!
是的他不太识字
Yeah, and he's a terrible reader.
我是他老师所以怪我
I'm his teacher, so that's on me.
好第一条黑暗秘密
Okay, dark secret number one,
我戴蓝色球帽以遮住我秃头的事实
"I wear a blue baseball cap to hide the fact that I am balding."
可以是任何人
That could be anybody!
第二条黑暗秘密
Dark secret number two,
我不信女巫
"I don't really believe in witches.
我只是喜欢三天的周末
"I just like three-day weekends
抽大♥麻♥ 做我的音乐
to get baked and work on my music."
靠那家伙秃头
Damn! Hey, that dude's bald!
大家快看啊
Everyone look at him!
第三条黑暗秘密
Dark secret number three,
我背着我伴侣和...偷♥情♥
"I cheated on my spouse with--"
住口
Stop!
老天满足他的要求吧
For the love of God, give him what he wants!
我告诉你我想要什么
I'll tell you what I want.
我想要什么米娅
What do I want, Mia?
你想要取消女巫节对吗
You want to cancel Witch Day, right?
当然
Um, yeah, sure.
这是个糟糕的传统
I mean it is a horrible tradition,
但这是我的第一次看上去还挺好玩的
but this is my first one and it actually looks kinda fun.
我不知道会有过山车和游戏
I didn't know there would be rides and games.
那是过山车吗