脆莓公园（2012）

Hey, Dottie! Two lemonades.
一杯给我 一杯给我的马屁精Steve
One for me and one for my submissive bitch, Steve.
Woody 这样行不通的
Woody, this is not gonna work out.
我的意思是 他们只不过是机器人
I mean, they're robots.
这是您要的两杯柠檬汁
Here are the two lemonades you requested.
或许我不该这么早下评判
Or maybe I shouldn't be so quick to judge.
熊猫交♥配♥的季节从七月持续到九月
The panda's mating season is from July to September.
很好 快吃那竹子
Yeah, eat that bamboo.
嘿 小声点 让我好好看电视
Hey, keep it down. I'm trying to watch TV.
看 Ajay 一只会说话的熊
Look, Ajay, a talking bear!
它就像泰迪•华斯比 上世纪80年代中期的儿童玩具
He is much like the Teddy Ruxpin, a children's toy from the mid-1980s.
把磁带从它菊花里插♥进♥去
You would simply insert audio cassettes into his anus
它就会给你读寓言故事
and he would read fables to you.
听着 不要用你们过头的职业道德来糟践我的生活
Listen, you're not gonna ruin my life with your annoying work ethic.
放松点 给自己找点乐子
Now loosen up, have some fun.
让我们像绅士一样 一起看看亚洲小♥电♥影♥吧
Let's watch some Asian porn together like gentlemen.
熊猫可不会让我们这样搞它 你这里有牛没?
Pandas don't do it for us. Do you have any cows?
我还是不敢相信Steve把我们卖♥♥了
I can't believe Steve did this to us.
没事的 Connie 我们在这儿也能找到饭碗
It's okay, Connie. We'll just find new jobs here.
在这个近亲繁殖的土佬窝子吗?
In this inbred, hick town?
把话给我收回去 我系这里的镇长
I take offense to that. I is the Mayor.
现在我系这里的镇长
Now I is the Mayor.
你特么最好把我的镇长帽还回来
You better gimme back my goddamn Mayor hat!
可悲的政♥治♥家
Politics.
什么笑话更会惹毛你? 9 11相关还是和7-11相关的?
What's more offensive to you? 9 11 jokes or 7-Eleven jokes?
嘿 Steve 快看
Hey, Steve, check this out.
我好像看到你老妈了
I think I've seen your mother.
你大脑袋从她阴♥道♥里出来 都把她给挤成弓形腿了
She's bow-legged from your fat head coming through her wagina.
真棒 如果我们俩谁有手 我们就能击掌了
Nice. If either one of us had hands, I'd high-five you.
Steve先生 我不敢相信他们竟如此糟践你
Mr. Steve, I can't believe they disrespect you like that.
没关系的 他们是我的朋友
Ah, it's okay. They're my buddies.
我才不是呢 傻缺 - 我也一样 傻缺
I'm not your buddy, dick hole! - Eh, me neither, dick hole!
你是多蒂 对吧
Uh, you're Dottie, right?
事实上 我叫石芬玛
Actually, my name is Rakshapani.
我叫Steve
Oh, uh, I'm Steve.
我知道 你是脆莓公园的头号♥林警
I know. You are the top ranger here at Brickleberry.
真的? 话说呢
Really? You know what?
我们真该找个时间一起吃饭 石粪马
We should grab dinner some time, rock... Shit... Pony.
这地方都被我们逛遍了
We've looked everywhere.
就是找不到任何地方有要人的
There's no job openings in this town.
这地方看着有戏 - Ethel 我看那是脱衣舞俱乐部
This place looks promising. - Ethel, I think that's a titty bar.
我不知道该不该去... - 真棒
I don't know if we should... - Yeah!
脱衣舞俱乐部 脱衣舞俱乐部
Tit-ty bar! Tit-ty bar!
请进 请进
Come in, come in!
老天 这生意真是越来越难做了
Jesus, this business is getting so stale.
你们想做什么?
What do you want?
看看是谁来了?
What do we have here?
就是你 你将是这世上脱衣舞的闪耀新星
You! You're the world's next stripping sensation!
好吧 伙计们 这是... 这是个艰难的决定
Well, guys, this is a... This is a tough decision,
但我决定做了 为了你们所有人我决定做了
but I'm going to do it. I'm gonna do it for all of us.
好的 先生 我愿以展现我的魔鬼身材来换饭钱
Okay, Sir, I will agree to expose my perfect body for money.
不是说你 瘦咪♥咪♥ 世上你这样的多了去了
Not you, skinny tits. There's a million just like you.
我是在说她呢
I'm talking about her!
我? - 她?
Me? - Her?
你是瞎子 对吧? - 闭嘴
You blind, right? - Shut your face!
职业生涯里
My whole career
我一直在追寻一样空前绝后的...
I've been looking for an act so unconventional
能震惊整个业界的人
that it will shake up the industry.
我给你铺好了阳关大道 我要把你培养成一颗巨星
I've got big plans. I'm going to make you a star!
我不知道 先生
Mm, I don't know, Mister.
我叫Jorge 来吧 我把这俩怪胎也雇了还不行嘛
It's Jorge. Come on! I'll even hire these two freaks.
好吧 我♥干♥ - 很好
Okay, I'll do it. - Yes!
你做新DJ 你可以去清理小便池
You'll be our new DJ, and you can mop up the peep booths.
什么? - 见鬼 我真不想当DJ
What? - Man. I hate DJ-ing.
你想换换口味吗? - 真的?
You want to switch jobs? - Really?
才不是呢 我爱死DJ了 你慢慢把那些精斑擦干净吧
Hell, no! I love DJ-ing. Have fun mopping up that semen.
你们怎么又忙里忙外了?
Aw, you guys are working again.
拜托 别管他了 我这里有更重要的事交给你们
Come on, put him down. I've got a really important job for you.
如果你们其中一个能鸡♥奸♥另外一个
Now, if one of you could rape the other one,
这场好戏就像《权力游戏》一样精彩了
this would be just like game of thrones.
这就是为什么耶稣能用混合招式打败甘地
And that is why Jesus could beat Gandhi in mixed martial arts.
Steve 你真是无所不知啊
Oh, Steve, you know so much about everything.
真希望哪天我也能成为像你一样棒的林警
I hope to one day become a great ranger like you.
没错 我是个好林警
True, I am a great ranger,
但我... 最近辜负了我的朋友们
but I'm... I, uh, let my friends down recently.
我相信你已经竭尽全力了
I'm sure you did everything you could.
你是个好人 Steve
You're a good man, Steve.
石粪马 我就喜欢你善解人意
Oh, rock shit pony. I love how you just get me.
印度菜馆
平时我最恨老外了 但实话实说 你们几个我还不怎么恨
Usually I hate foreigners, I'm gonna be honest, but you guys I hate way less.
这还真好玩 但是 我们得回去工作了
This has been very much fun. Unfortunately, we must get back to work.
这个钟点就回去工作? 不是吧
Back to work at this hour? Come on!
Woody老爷建议说取消我们的下班睡觉时间
Mr. Woody has advised me we do not get time off to sleep even.
别听他扯淡 - 不听怎么行?
Well, don't listen to him. - How do you don't listen?
傻了吧 在美国 你唯一应该服从的
See, here in America, the only person you should take orders from
是你的朋友 比如说我
are your friends, like me.
如果你老板让你去做啥 只是跟你商量罢了
When your boss tells you to do something, it's just a suggestion.
真正目标是 能少干就少干 干多就是王八蛋
The goal should be to do as little work as humanly possible.
真的呀? 关于美国 咱们还得懂点啥?
Really? What else should we know about America?
我真不敢相信我们参加了真正的美国脱衣舞会
I cannot believe we are at a real American strip party.
就是呀 哥现在要撒一把小额面值货币
I know. I will now produce precipitation using this low-denominational currency.
那 褐种男 准备好介绍妞儿们了吗?
So, mahogany man. Are you ready to introduce the girls?
好了 我还大胆做了点背景调查
Yeah. I took it upon myself to do a little research.
嘿 老少爷们 我是你们的主持人 小脏弟
Hey, y'all, it's your boy, Dirty D,
独一无二 有一说一的DJ
the only DJ that tells it like it really is.
接下来上台的是一位青春热辣女
Up next to the stage is a hot young lady
曾被有特殊需求的表哥性侵
who was sexually abused by her special needs brother.
她归咎于自身 又染上了好凶的毒瘾
She blamed herself and picked up a nasty meth habit.
大家 表现出你们的激♥情♥
Please, show her some love
也许今晚她就不会哭着睡去
and maybe she won't cry herself to sleep tonight.
欢迎"糖果"登上大舞台
Welcome Kandy to the main stage!
你们在这儿啊 Woody发飙了
There you are! Woody is pissed.
你们应该在上班的
You guys should be at work!
嘿 猪油脸 哥们现在是在美国
Hey, lard face, we are in America now.
这才叫作入乡随俗
This is how the game is played.
对嘛 正是懒病发作时 穿条李维斯
Yes, it's time to be lazy, wear the Levi,
吃点油炸土豆条 看些大奶♥子♥
eat the french fry, and see the titty.
嘿 Ethel 你在这儿干嘛?
Hey, Ethel. What are you doing here?
新工作啊 专职美乃滋擦洗员 多谢你啊 Steve
My new job, the official mayonnaise mopper thanks to you, Steve.
我的简历上绝对够看的
This'll look great on my resume.
这工作也没那么糟糕啦
It's not that bad of a gig.
嘿 Ethel 你给我快点去香槟包房♥
Hey. Ethel! I need you in the Champagne room!
好像是酸奶溅了一房♥间似的
It looks like a pinkberry exploded in there!
接下来上场的是"水晶"
Up next is Crystal.
她扭臀卖♥♥笑 只为了奶粉钱
She'll be shakin' that ass to buy baby formula.
她因偷纸尿布被判缓刑
She's on probation for stealin' Huggies
她住在一辆1980款的蒙特卡罗小轿车里
and she lives in a 1980 Monte Carlo!
唯一比她每小时薪水更低的 就是她的自尊
The only thing lower than her hourly rates is her self-esteem.
大家为了"水晶" 狂热动起来
So let's get rock hard for Crystal!
好啦 Ajay 我可赌了50块在Mohindernanthan身上
All right, Ajay. I got 50 on Mohindernanthan.
这特么是搞啥? 这地方你们都是禁止入内的
What in the hell is going on? You're not even allowed in here!
我们跟熊玩乒乓球啊
We do the ping pong with the bear.
我好像告诉你们的是把垃圾扔到湖里吧
I thought I told you to drag that trash into the lake!
我们没那心思
We did not feel like it.
没心思... 你们这些机器人死定了
Didn't f... You robots are dead meat!
我要加倍你们的工作量 你们现在做的工作
I am doubling your work! The work that you are doing now,
下次就是翻倍做了 翻倍
your going to be doing twice as much of it! Doubling!
你们到底有没有听 我...
You ever heard of that, ra...?
你特么这又是干嘛 Steve?
Whoa! What the hell are you doing, Steve?
以你的标准都有点太重口了
This is even weird for you.
Woody 我...
Woody, I, uh...