一起单身（2018）

Alone Together S01E01

Part 5 April 30, 2021, 1:28 p.m.

I'll have a vodka cranberry and you have a vodka vodka.
伏特加伏特加伏特加
Vodka vodka vodka.
这是福滋熊的笑话
It's a Fozzie Bear joke.
我不...
I don't...
我去调饮料
I'll make our drinks.
好
Okay.
住在洛杉矶是很吓人
Living in L. A. is so intimidating.
所有的女孩都很漂亮
All the girls are so pretty.
我得大老远开车去凡奈斯上动感单车课
I have to drive to Van Nuys just to take a spin class.
好了艾丝特别这么说你自己
Come on, Esther, I will not let you talk about yourself like that.
你又年轻又漂亮
You are a young, beautiful girl.
还有我的颧骨你看见了吗
And my cheekbones you can see them?
开玩笑雷·查尔斯[50年代灵魂歌♥手 7岁失明]都能看见你的颧骨
Are you kidding? Ray Charles can see those cheekbones.
我不知道那是谁但他听起来很不错
I don't know who that is, but he sounds so nice.
沃伦你一直那么支持我
Honestly, Warren, you've been so supportive of me.
我只是不想让你怀疑自己
I just don't want you to ever doubt yourself.
好吧
I guess.
拉钩
Pinky swear.
好吧
Okay.
你在干什么
What are you doing?
我以为我们的感觉是一样...
I thought we were feeling the sa...
我把车停哪了
Where the hell did I park my car?
醒醒班吉快醒醒
Wake up. Benji, wake up.
我白天喝酒来着
Hey, I've been day-drinking.
我现在真的真的吓坏了
I'm really, really creeped out right now.
我在网上认识的那个大叔让我穿着卫衣带我去牛排馆那个大叔
The old guy I met online who paid me to eat macaroni wearing sweatpants
原来是个大变♥态♥
turned out to be a total creep.
真的吗
Really?
不敢相信我会这么说
I can't believe I'm saying this,
但我真该听你的
but I should have listened to you.
首先你不要再和恋童癖约会了
Well, firstly, you've got to stop dating guys who have 12-year-old girl fetishes.
-好难啊 -听着你必须接受
- It's really hard. - Look, man, you just gotta accept it
你不是时尚达人
you're not a fashionista,
也不是应♥召♥女你就是艾丝特
you're not an escort, you're an Esther.
等等夏洛特去哪了我们说好
Wait, where's Charlotte? We're supposed to go
去农贸市场来着跟高个子情侣一样
to the farmer's market like tall couples do.
-夏洛特 -她不在
- Charlotte! - She's not here.
我来的时候房♥子里就没别人
The house was empty when I got here.
天哪
My God!
我的棒球卡没了
My baseball card is missing!
夏洛特把你抢劫了吗
Did Charlotte rob you?
你居然责备受害者
You're victim shaming me.
班吉放松点
Benji, relax, okay?
听我说你有天会开始交信托基金
Look, one day your trust fund's gonna kick in,
你也会遇到一个真心喜欢你的人
and you'll meet someone who likes you for you.
谢谢你
Thanks?
我们一起保证再也不要
Let's just promise that we're not gonna do
跟这些应♥召♥男女搀和在一起继续我们的生活
any more escort stuff and move on with our lives.
-你说得对 -再也不找应♥召♥男女了
- You're right. - We're done with escorting.
对没错结束了
Okay, fine. Right. We're done, right?
你确定这是摆脱夏洛特阴影的好办法
Are you sure this is a good way to get over Charlotte?
无论如何跟应♥召♥女肯定能找到真爱的
You're gonna find love with an escort come hell or high water.
我很紧张选了个最便宜的
I'm kinda nervous. I got the cheapest one.
希望她很漂亮
I hope she's pretty.
你好我是艾丽西亚·希尔弗斯坦
Hi, I'm Alicia Silverstein.
我来找诺兰
I'm here to meet Nolan.
你俩注定要在一起就像O· J·辛普森注定要进监狱
The two of you were meant to be together, like O. J. And jail.
都是命中注定
The universe is gonna get what it wants.
我喜欢你的性工作者装扮
I like your sex worker outfit.
谢谢
Thank you.
我喜欢你艾迪·明斯特[196♥4♥年喜剧"明斯特一家"主角]的打扮
I like your Eddie Munster costume.
你是不是抢劫了个11岁的小姑娘
Did you rob an 11-year-old?
才搞到这身衣服
Is that where you got this outfit from?
你抢劫了个11岁小荡♥妇♥吗
You rob a slutty 11-year-old?
我一直想打扮成这样
This is what I've always wanted to look like.
真的吗
Is it really? Yeah.
你就像犹太人版的安妮那个音乐剧
You look like the Jewish version of Annie, the musical.
那真是... 你疯了吧
That's actually way... that's crazy,
你看着才像她呢
'cause that is literally what you look like.
太疯狂了你说的就是你
That is so insane, 'cause that is you.
-我们走吧真的能走了吗 -不行
- Can we go? For real, can we go? - No.
玉米片带不走花30块钱点的
These nachos aren't gonna travel. This is $30 worth of food.
我才不会浪费呢
I'm not letting it go to waste.
我我们中西部人
I'm from the Midwest.
从不浪费食物
We don't waste food.
如果要在这里坐很久
Well, if we're gonna be here forever,
不如来看看这个见不得人的欧洲网站
I found this shady European website,
可以免费看"拽妹黛薇儿"
and you can stream episodes of Daria for free.
好啊一起看
Sure, I'm down.
我们会孤独终老吗
Are we gonna die alone?
关于这个问题我想了很多答案是没错
You know, I've put a lot of thought into that, and yeah.
好吧你知道吗
Right. Well, you know what?
和临终的人聊天真的超级不舒服
Small talk with dying people is super uncomfortable anyways.
我知道我奶奶要死的时候
I know. When my nana was dying,
我习惯性地问了一句最近生活怎么样
out of habit, I was like, "How's life?"
她大概一个小时之后就死了
She, like, died, like, an hour later.
人生就只有六十分钟
Life was sixty minutes.