一起单身（2018）

Alone Together S01E03

Part 4 April 30, 2021, 1:28 p.m.

and I was just so overjoyed by your decision.
我都等不及要给你看这个了
I couldn't wait to show you this.
好了睁开眼睛
Okay, open your eyes.
天哪
My God!
我的妈呀
My God!
芭蕾把杆
A ballet barre!
全身镜练习踢踏舞的硬地板
A full-length mirror, hardwood floors for practicing tap.
排练单人秀的舞台
A stage for rehearsing one-woman shows.
还能舞礼仪杖
And you can even twirl a baton.
窗户是用防碎玻璃做的
The windows are shatterproof glass.
礼仪杖
Batons!
我以为我最小的孩子会是女孩
I thought my youngest was gonna be a girl,
波比出生后我根本不愿意把东西撤下来
and when Bobby was born, I didn't have the heart to take everything down.
我知道有一天这一切命中注定的天使会降临
I knew someday the precious angel that this was all meant for would come along.
我来了
And here I am.
什么亲爱的
Excuse me, honey?
我明天就能搬进来
I can move in tomorrow.
我只需要回家拿牙套就行了
I just need to go home and get my night guard.
其实要是住在这我肯定不会磨牙
Actually, if I'm living here, I won't grind.
我今天就能搬进来
I can move in today.
你刚刚说房♥间是为我准备的
You just said that I'm the person that this room was meant for,
我走进你的生活解决你的问题
and, you know, I just walked into your life and solved all your problems.
不这是你说的我说这是为我的女儿准备的
No, you said that. I said that this was meant for my daughter.
你说我是家人
But you said I was family.
对我跟很多人说过
Yeah, I say that to lots of people.
大家都说我很暖心
I'm told I'm very warm.
你骗我
So you lied to me.
我真心想帮你
You know, I really wanted this to work for you,
但我怎么能把我的卵子给一个
but how can I give my eggs to someone
靠女儿维系生命的人
who's just gonna live vicariously through their daughter?
太变♥态♥了
That is so creepy.
你也一样
You're doing the same exact thing.
这是你的错误所在杰姬
That's where you're wrong, Jackie, okay?
我不想我女儿拥有这些是我自己想要
I don't want my daughter to have any of this. I want it for myself.
很高兴认识你
It was very nice meeting you.
你很棒很漂亮
You're very cool and very pretty,
要是我们在别的情况认识
and I'm sure that if we had met under different circumstances,
肯定会成为好朋友
we would've been best friends.
我能拿一根礼仪杖当作小谢礼吗
Can I take one baton as a goodie bag?
不行抱歉
I don't think so. Sorry.
不用送了
I'll see myself out.
你肯定不信杰姬图谋不轨居心叵测
You won't believe this, but Jackie was in it for the wrong reasons.
是吗
Really?
选美冠军动机不纯而她孩子正在慢慢死于气喘
The beauty queen whose child is slowly dying of asthma has bad priorities.
你的卵子怎么办
What are you gonna do with your eggs?
不冷藏了
I'm just not gonna freeze 'em.
等我准备好要孩子
Maybe by the time I'm ready to have kids,
就可以养自己的小克隆体
I'll be able to raise my own little clone.
看
Aw, look.
他很孤单但是在努力
He's lonely, but he's making it work.
我教他的我的作风
I taught him that. That's my brand.
我们可以走了吗
Can we just get outta here?
我想吃蛋卷冰淇淋真的很想
I have a taste for soft serve, and it's getting serious.
等等
Wait.
这是我的
Hey, that's mine.
锁门
Lock the doors.
一会儿要是有动起手手套箱有气喇叭
If stuff gets physical, there's an air horn in the glove box.
要是变成"西区故事"[音乐剧]的斗舞
Okay, but if it becomes a West Side Story dance fight,
-我加入你 -不知道是啥不过可以
- I'm joining you. - I don't know what that is, but okay.
五六七八
A-five, six, seven, eight.
各位
Hey, guys.
在这干嘛呢我们是一群耍酷男孩
What's going on here? We're just a bunch of cool dudes,
做着牛逼的事对吧
doing cool dude stuff, right?
好了
All right.
波比看了我给你发的演讲视频吗
Bobby, you watch the TED talk I sent you?
这呆子是谁你♥爸♥爸
Who's this dork, your dad?
不是我爸爸他只是个单身怪胎
It's not my dad. He's just some weird single guy
迷恋我的内♥裤♥
who's obsessed with my underwear.
你说什么我在帮你解围
What are you talking about, man? I'm just trying to help you out.
你的袜子怎么样了
What's your sock situation like?
想去买♥♥袜子吗你们想一起来吗
You wanna go sock shopping? You guys wanna come?
离我远点骆驼趾
Get the hell away from me, Cameltoe.
最弱鸡的小孩才会被叫骆驼趾我告诉你的
Whoa. Only the weakest kid gets called Cameltoe. I told you that.
有必要吗波比
Was that necessary, Bobby?
击掌
Give me some.
老师变成骆驼趾
Teacher becomes the Cameltoe.
经典
Classic.
你没有请求支援
You didn't call for back-up.
什么情况
What's going on?
很好好的谢谢
Great. All right. Thank you.
精♥子♥测试结果出来了结果不确定
I got my sperm test results. Inconclusive.
我不能跟你一起回生育诊所
Okay. Well, I'm not gonna be able to go back to the fertility clinic with you,
因为像在她之前的女强人一样
because, like so many strong women before her,
安德森医生已经在脸书上屏蔽我了
Dr. Anderson has blocked me on Facebook.
我不想回去我喜欢未知结果
I don't wanna go back. I kinda like not knowing.
现在看着我的精♥子♥
Now when I look at my semen,
可以想象出无穷无尽的可能
I can think of an infinite world of possibilities.
我对我的囊状卵泡完全同感
That's exactly how I feel about my antral follicles.
安德森医生说它们跟教科书上一样健康
Dr. Anderson said they're actually right out of a textbook.
我当时也在
I was there.
但是她不在
But she wasn't.
说起来你的等身芭比有点吓到我你能把她的头转过去吗
Speaking of which, your My Size Barbie is kinda creeping me out. Can you turn her head around?
阿玛贝拉想让你转过去
Actually, Amabella would like for you to turn around,
因为你让她不自在
'cause you're making her uncomfortable.
阿玛贝拉哪里人啊
Amabella? What region is that from?
我从来没听过有人叫阿玛贝拉
I've never heard of an Amabella.
她来自芬兰
She's actually from Finland.
阿玛贝拉问个问题
Amabella, just a quick question.
你可以给我介绍个可爱的妞吗
Do you think maybe you could, like, introduce me to, like, a cute friend?
她说给500块就能看她裸体
She said that for $500, you can see her naked.
我不... 很诡异我知道
I'm not... it's weird, I know.
但这是她说的
But that's what she said.
这... 不是吧
That... that's not right.