一起单身（2018）

纪念她的生平
is to have a celebration of her life.
我不懂
I don't get it.
这些都是莉兹生前喜欢的东西
These are all the things that Lizzy loved.
她喜欢发泡彩胶 喜欢吸管清洁棒
She loved puffy paints, and pipe cleaners,
还有毛绒球
and loose feathers.
我们为她敬杯酒吧
You know, we should do a toast.
致莉兹
To Lizzy.
这样才对嘛
That would be really nice.
不过要记得 今晚不喝酒
But no alcohol, remember,
所以 就敬一杯甜菊柠檬水吧
so maybe, like, a stevia lemonade toast.
好吧
Okay.
这边 凯特琳
This way, Caitlyn.
我想 就以怀旧的露营游戏开始这个美妙的夜晚吧
So I was thinking we could get the night started with a little nostalgic camp activity.
绳球[两人用手或木棒反向击球 先将绳完全绕在木杆上的人获胜]
Tetherball!
我以前用这个砸过你
Man, I used to crush you at this.
在幼儿园的拍卖♥♥屋买♥♥的
Got it at a pre-school foreclosure.
真可惜 不过我还是会打败你
That's sad, but I'm still gonna beat you.
是吗
Yeah?
看看吃了这个以后我们俩谁厉害一点
Let's see how good either of us are after we eat this.
嗑药啊
Drugs.
我现在是个成熟♥女♥人了
I'm actually a very holistic person now.
很好啊 这就是个植物草本衍生物
Well, that's fine. This is actually a plant derivative.
在秘鲁 这就是种超级水果
In Peru, this is considered a super fruit.
抱歉 我不嗑药了
Sorry, I don't do drugs anymore.
你戒了
You don't?
你戒多久了
How long have you been sober for?
两天
Two days.
这种事 你懂的
That's a thing, you know.
供货的人总想睡你 实在不容易
It's pretty tough when your sponsors are trying to sleep with you all the time.
连瘾君子都信不过 还能相信谁
Yeah, if you can't trust a drug addict,who can you trust?
那... 我发球
Well... my serve.
我本来计划嗑着药玩这个的
My plan was to do this on drugs.
现在清醒得像"大人物拿破仑"[美国电影]
I'm doing it sober like Napoleon Dynamite.
你都没认真玩
You're not even trying.
用力点 男人点
Hit it hard. Have some pride.
接受挑战
Okay. Challenge accepted.
班吉
Benji.
天哪 你没事吧
My God, are you okay?
没事 球很软
Yeah, I'm fine. The ball's pretty soft.
对不起
My God, I'm so sorry.
我不是故意打断你的
I did not mean to interrupt you.
班吉 我有急事要跟你说
Benji, I really need to talk to you inside immediately.
我没事 去吧
I'm fine. Go.
在这儿等我 马上回来
Just wait right there. I'll be right back.
再弥补浪费的时间 我准备了好多惊喜呢
We'll make up for lost time, and, um, I've got so many fun surprises,all right?
我很快回来
I'll be right back.
我懵了 你给死人办聚会
I'm confused. You threw a party for a dead person?
不是我本意
Not on purpose.
莉兹是不是那个法律助理 给你外交特权
Was Lizzy that paralegal who got you diplomatic immunity
-让你在装卸区停车 -不是 那是克丽丝汀娜
- to park in loading zones? - No, that was Christina.
莉兹是我在果汁吧的经理
Lizzy was my manager at the juice bar,
她把我辞退 因为她说她知道我是要成大事的人
the one who had to let me go because she said she knew I was meant for bigger things.
你从活性炭柠檬水里面贪污了几百块吧
Right, you stole a few hundred dollars in charcoal lemonade, right?
而且因为她相信我
And because she believed in me.
现在外面有群没人带头的姑娘 还有件没人穿的衣服
Now there's a group of girls out there with no leader, there's a shirt with nobody to wear it.
这是个战区
I mean, it's a war zone.
我们已经失去一名战友了
We've already lost one of our own.
太戏剧化了 女权的真空[领导人突然死亡导致职位的短期空缺]
Okay, yeah, this sounds dramatic. A female power vacuum.
我也不知道该跟你说什么
I don't know what to tell you.
天哪 你说得对
My God, you're right.
权力真空 很危险
It's a power vacuum. That is so dangerous.
这就是为什么 我 贝卡 洁米和克丽丝汀娜的友谊
I mean, that's why me, Becca, Jamie, and Christina
到小学五年级就继续不下去了
never made it past the fifth grade,
因为我们没有领导
because we had no leader.
我们商量不好双胞胎日[找好朋友穿同样的衣服]穿什么 真事
We couldn't decide what to wear on twin day. True story.
艾丝特 我爱你 但你刚刚说的人名
Esther, I love you, but you just say people's names
我好像应该都知道 但我一个也不认识
like I'm supposed to know who they are,and I don't.
我必须得做点什么
I have to do something,
为了纪念莉兹 也为了我的聚会
for Lizzy's memory, and for my party,
现在情况都很糟糕
because both are in very bad shape right now.
老铁 别严格安排什么活动了
Dude, stop with the structured activities,
放轻松 大家参加聚会就是来放松的
and just chill out; that's what people wanna do.
我跟凯特琳现在就是这样 玩得特别开心
That's what I'm doing with Caitlyn, and we're having an awesome time.
我晚点再替你们高兴
I can be happy for you and Caitlyn later,
现在 外面有一群妹子
but right now, there is a group of girls out there
需要我来领导
that needs me to be their leader.
-我来做她们的雪儿·霍洛维茨 -好吧 祝你好运
- Their Cher Horowitz. - All right. Good luck.
我马上就要掌管
I mean, I am about to be in charge
6个年轻妹子
of a group of six young women
负责我们的余生
for the rest of our lives,
带她们经历人生的起伏 不管是事业
through the ups and downs of career,
婚姻 孩子 离婚 还是丈夫去世
marriage, children, divorce, our husbands dying.
这是个挑战
I mean, it's gonna be a challenge,
但我要迎难而上
but I'm up for it.
祝我好运
Wish me luck.
我十秒钟前就祝你好运了
I just wished you luck ten seconds ago.
你都不听我说话
You don't listen to anything I say.
抱歉 我朋友疯疯癫癫的
Sorry about my wacky friend.
你怎么了
What's going on?
我头疼
I have a headache,
我在用水晶治疗法打通任督二脉
so I'm using crystal therapy to open my energy pathways.
姐们儿 你脸上的是石头
Girl, you got rocks on your face.
你可能脑震荡了
I think you have a concussion.
去医院吧
Let's go to the hospital.
不去
No way.
让西医给我注射致癌物吗
So western medicine can pump me full of cancer-causing agents?
我才不要
I don't think so.
你有牛至油吗 比阿司匹林好用
Do you have oregano oil? It works way better than aspirin.
牛至...
Oregano? Um...
我哥哥约过很多疯女人
My brother dates a lot of crazy girls,
他有个抽屉里什么都有 我去那找找
and he has this drawer full of stuff; I can check there.
你觉得我也是疯女人吗
You think I'm crazy?
我觉得你性感得让我发疯
I think you're crazy hot.
马上回来
I'll be right back.
-她怎么能不... -莉兹讨厌手工品
- How can she not... - Lizzy hated crafts.
姑娘们 都过来 完美
Okay, ladies, gather round. Perfect.
玛莉莎去哪了
Wait, what happened to Marissa?
玛莉莎走了
Marissa had to go,
泰国那边打来了个工作电♥话♥ 所以...
and there was a phone call in Thailand for work, so...
世界公民 国际化 我喜欢
Global citizen. So worldly, I love that.
剩下的人
Okay, for the rest of us,
我们开始手工接龙
let's get to crafts circuits, right?
杰茜 你来做扎染
Jess, let's start you at the tie dye station,
开米 去写花体字 小心 M很难写
and Cammy, calligraphy. Be careful, those M's are super tricky.
索菲亚 贴纸簿
Sophia, sticker books.
铃响时我们再交换工作
When you guys hear the bell, we'll rotate.
我要去做糖果沙拉
I am gonna start making my candy salad.
用超级神秘的家传秘方
It's a super secret family recipe.
我奶奶其实是从糖果世界移♥民♥过来的 所以...
My grandmother actually immigrated from Candyland, so...
当时真是美好时光
Good times.
都开工吧
I'll see ya in there.
我要叫辆滴滴
Okay, I'm gonna call a Lyft.
我要去门厅
I wanna get in there.
-等我换鞋 -应该和玛莉莎一起走的
- Let me get my shoes. - Should have gone with Marissa.
我怎么没想起和她一辆车走
Why didn't I get a ride with her?
你们要干嘛
Whoa, whoa, where are you guys going?
你长得像滴滴司机 能带我们离开这吗
You look like a Lyft driver. Can you get us out of here?
我们要走了 全是给小孩子玩的
We're leaving, it's just all kids' stuff.
也没有酒
Plus there's no booze.
你们不能就这么走掉
You can't just leave.