我爱上的人是奇葩（2014）
You're the Worst S01E06
Part 1
Oct. 14, 2020, 4:30 p.m.
The key to any successful relationship is communication.
任何情感关系成功的关键就是沟通
What do you think is keeping the two of you
你们觉得让你们两个
from being able to fully trust each other?
无法完全信任对方的原因是什么
Most of the time, things are good.
大多数时候 情况都很好
But out of the blue, we'll have a minor disagreement.
但有时突然间 我们又会出现小分歧
And then we're fighting for hours.
然后我们就会争吵好几个小时
Vernon, what do you think about what Becca just said?
弗南 你对贝卡刚刚所说的有什么想法
Pissed, dude.
十分生气 老兄
Bummed. It makes me feel like what the shit?
相当郁闷 让我觉得这是在搞鸡♥巴♥毛啊
She talks to me like I'm a child.
她跟我说话 就像我是个小孩一样
Because you are a child.
因为你本来就是小孩啊
Oh, really? A child doctor, Becca?
是吗 小孩能当医生吗 贝卡
A child doctor with a BMW 7 Series
你见过开宝马7系
and credit score well into the five hundos?
信用评分超500的小孩子医生吗
He almost got fired
他差点就被开除了
because during a hip resurfacing,
因为在一次髋关节表面置换手术中
he took his sunglasses,
他取出自己的墨镜
put them on the patient's testicles
放在了病人的睾丸上
and took a picture of it.
然后拍了一张照
Humor is a necessity in the operating room.
幽默是手术室必不可少的元素
Otherwise,
否则的话
we would collapse under the sheer weight of the human drama.
我们会被人体的戏剧性搞得彻底崩溃
Guys? Right...
二位 好了
You fix tennis elbows for rich people!
你是替富人治疗网球肘发炎的
Do not tell me how to do my calling!
不用你告诉我怎么做我的工作
Okay, guys, let's take a breath.
好了 二位 稍微淡定点
And remember you're here because you love each other.
记住你们来到这里是因为你们爱对方
There she is. Is it possible
瞧这样多好 有没有可能
that the problem
真正的问题
isn't between the two of you?
并不是在你们之间的
But rather in the negative external elements
而是身边外界的负能量太多
that are influencing your relationship?
影响到了你们的关系
So, our therapist said
我们的心理医生说
we need to cut out the toxic elements,
我们得跟那些毒害因素撇清关系
which means
也就是说
we just can't have couples
我们的生活中不能再有
like you in our life anymore.
你们这样的奇葩情侣了
We're not a couple.
我们才不是小情侣
We are just hanging out.
我们只是一起玩而已
Wait.
等等
Breakfast is still on you, right?
早餐还是你们请的 对吧
Yeah, totally. I gave them my card.
是啊 当然了 我把卡都给他们了
It's a Chase Saph,
是大通银行蓝宝石信♥用♥卡♥
which means when I use it at restaurants,
也就是说我在餐厅用这张卡时
I double-down on the points...
可以获得双倍积分
Anyway.
总之呢
Don't try to talk this out of it.
不用试图劝我们回心转意了
Okay.
好吧
Well, good luck. Both of you.
祝你们两个好运了
So, I got an XBOX ONE
我有台XBOX ONE游戏机
if you ever want to dork out on some Madden.
想玩劲爆橄榄球游戏的话找我
Vernon?
弗南
I meant dork out online. We can't even headset-hang?
我是说玩线上游戏 带耳机都不行吗
What are you doing later?
你待会儿要去干什么
I am interviewing
我要为《密友》杂♥志♥
"Hollywood It Girl" Megan Thomas for Coterie magazine.
采访好莱坞名媛梅根·托马斯
Oh, she's hot. Send me pics.
她好性感 记得给我发照片
Nudes?
裸照吗
Yeah, okay, buddy.
行啊 小哥
If you think you can
如果你觉得你可以让
get Megan Thomas naked, more power to you.
梅根·托马斯脱♥光♥衣服的话 尽管上吧
Well, I was kidding.
我开玩笑的而已
But as you said, "We're not a couple,"
但正如你刚刚所说 我们并不是情侣
So legally, I'm free to try, right?
所以我有尝试的自♥由♥
Did it bother you when I said that?
我那样说惹你不爽了吗
No, no.
没 没有
It's important to set clear rules.
设定清楚的规矩是很重要的
This is on the curly ginger, yeah?
早餐钱算在那个棕黄色卷毛头上 对吧
All right, in that case, we'll take some things to go.
那样的话 我要点些东西打包带走
Well, one of everything from the left side.
左边所有食物每样来一份吧
Oh, and four of those souvenir T-shirts.
再来4件那种纪念T恤
Ooh, throw in a large child's.
再加一件大号♥儿童尺码的
Killian.
卡利安
Who?
谁啊
Okay, so, um...
听着 那个...
how does one prepare for a role
要如何为这样一个角色做准备啊
in which you play a...
毕竟你要演的是...
Sorry.
抱歉
A tsunami widow?
海啸造成的寡妇
Shut up.
别瞎说
Um, all right, this is the official quote.
好吧 接下来这段是给你引用的
It was a singular pleasure
能够将如此充满勇气的一个角色
to be able to bring a story of such courage to life.
展现在观众面前 真是极大的快乐
Plus, I did, like, six weeks of Haleo and CrossFit twice a day.
并且 我连续6周每天做两次健身操
Feel my calf, dude.
感受一下我的小腿吧 小哥
That does indeed feel like the calf of a grieving widow.
感觉确实很像一个悲伤寡妇的小腿呢
You're a foot dude.
你是个恋足癖啊
No.
不是
Yes.
是的
You don't have to let go.
你不用放手的
Does your girlfriend have nice feet?
你女朋友的脚漂亮吗
Aw, she's not my girlfriend.
她可不是我女朋友
In fact, earlier today,
实际上 今天早些时候
she said it straight out, "We are not a couple.
她直接说了 我们不是一对小情侣
Yeah, that's just something that girls say
是啊 女孩子就喜欢说这种话
'cause they feel like they have to.
因为她们觉得像是非说不可一样
No, she's not like that at all.
不 她才不是那种傲娇女呢
She's actually challenged me to try and get a...
她竟然激我不敢...
a nude photo of you.
搞到一张你的裸照
I mean, of course I told her
当然了 我对她说了
that would be completely unprofessional.
那实在太违背职业道德了
We should get another round.
我们再喝一圈吧
Perfect timing. I have great news.
起来得正好 我有个好消息
What-- you found your own place?
怎么 你要搬出去自己住了吗
My therapist said
我的心理医生说
I should be alone as little as possible
我应该尽量不要一个人独处
on account of how I've been
因为我有时候半夜醒来
waking up holding a knife.
手里会握着把刀
Wait, what?!
等等 什么
Ah, it's not important.
那不重要啦
Anyway, the news was
总之呢 好消息就是
I made breakfast nachos.
我做了早餐玉米片
Go back to the knife thing.
继续说刀的事
Not just breakfast nachos,
不只是普通早餐玉米片哦
breakfast nachos on a Jimmy and Gretchen
而是吉米和格雷琴特制早餐玉米片
with the peanuts on top
上面是花生
because I know Gretch likes the crunch.
因为我知道格雷琴有多喜欢蹦脆的东西
I got to go, bud.
我得走了 小哥
I'll, uh, I'll walk you out.
我 我送你出去吧
Me gusta.
我喜欢
I can't believe Jimmy sent you naked photos of a celeb.
我简直不敢相信吉米发了名媛的裸照给你
I kind of dared him to.
我激他不敢的
I didn't think he'd actually be to hit that.
我没想到他真的有胆去做
You have to break up with him-- big.
你必须跟他分手 闹大一点
What if we spray-painted
不如我们在他的车♥库♥门上
"Pedophile" On his garage door?
喷"恋童癖"字样吧
I did that when my neighbors
我当年就这么做过
left their Christmas lights up too long.
因为我的邻居把圣诞灯亮太久不关
I can't exactly be pissed off. I'm not his girlfriend.
我也没理由生气啊 我又不是他女友
You at least have to sleep with someone else, too,
那你至少也得找个人睡一次
我爱上的人是奇葩（2014）
You're the Worst
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