that only humans can understand: revenge.
一件只有人类能理解的事 复仇
I got up and I stalked after him.
我站起来 慢慢逼近他
I just wanted to...
我只想...
Strangle him and eat his flesh?
掐死他然后吃了他吗
Yes!
没错
Now we're getting somewhere.
终于有进展了
But just as I was about to do that...
但我正准备这么做的时候
I saw him do the same thing to someone else.
我看到他正对另一个人做同样的事情
I'd never seen such pointless brutality.
我从没见过如此毫无意义的暴行
I was so transfixed by the horror
我被这恐怖景象吓呆了
that I didn't notice the moon had come out.
都没注意到月亮已经升起
But having caught a glimpse
光是看到
of what human nature was capable of,
残酷人性的冰山一角
I wanted no more part of it.
我就再也不想做人类了
I decided to shed my clothes and return to the wild!
我决定脱下我的衣服 回归野外
Man, she hit like a man.
她揍人像男人一样狠
That's because she used to be...
那是因为她以前就是...
uh, she once...
她以前...
She's transgender.
她是个变性人
What?
什么
You can't transform into a different sex!
你不可能变成另外一种性别
That's nuts!
那太疯狂了
It's not nuts.
那不疯狂
It's actually a very common medical procedure.
那其实只需要很普通的医疗手段而已
You don't need the surgery, technically...
严格来说都不需要做手术...
Maybe that's what I could do!
也许我该去做那个
It's a cure!
能治好我
No.
不能
Well, I've got to stop transforming.
我不能再变形了
I'll do the surgery.
我去做那个手术
Completely different.
完全不一样
I don't care how much it costs,
我不管要花多少钱
I'll do it.
我去做
They cut off your genitals.
他们会切掉你的生殖器
Nah, I'll leave it.
那就算了
That's... that's a step too far, isn't it?
那 那太过分了 是不是
Yeah. Okay.
是 好吧
Well, anyway, I think she gave me a concussion.
无论如何 我觉得她把我打出脑震荡了
Rest of the night's pretty foggy.
那天晚上之后的记忆都很模糊
Some people chased me around a truck,
有人绕着辆卡车追我
and a man took a picture of me in the Porta Potti.
一个人在移♥动♥厕所里给我拍了张照
That was me, actually.
那其实是我
I thought I recognized you!
我就觉得你很眼熟
But wait... how could you have changed back into a man?
但等等 你怎么会变回人类的呢
It wasn't morning yet.
当时还没到早上
I don't know how it works. I'm not a scientist.
我又不知道变形的规律 我不是科学家
I'm just looking for some kind of internal logic.
我只是想找出这里面内在的逻辑联♥系♥
Why?
为什么
There isn't an external logic to any of it.
这连外在的逻辑联♥系♥都没有
I mean, I went back to the motel,
后来我回到了汽车旅馆
and a jackalope head on the wall started screaming at me.
结果墙上一个鹿角兔的脑袋开始冲我尖叫
Explain that.
你解释看看
And I'm creeped out by jackalopes,
自从我一个朋友被鹿角兔撞伤
ever since a friend of mine got gored by one.
我就特别害怕鹿角兔
Jackalopes aren't real.
没有鹿角兔这种东西
They-they were a hoax perpetrated by
鹿角兔是1932年怀俄明州
a Wyoming taxidermist in 1932.
一个动物标本制♥作♥师制♥造♥的骗局
They... they don't exist.
鹿角兔根本不存在
Well, I'd like to see you explain that
我倒想看你跟我那死去的朋友乔治
to my dead friend, George!
解释看看
Anyway,
无论如何
I fled the motel,
我从旅馆逃走了
turned into a human again the next morning
第二天早上又变成了人类
and went into work.
继续去工作
Welcome to Smart Phones Is Us.
欢迎来到智能手♥机♥我家强
How may I help?
请问您有什么需要
I'm wondering if I can ask you some questions.
能不能问你几个问题
I think maybe my phone isn't working right,
我觉得我的手♥机♥坏了
'cause guys don't send me pictures of their junk on it.
因为男人都不给我发他们丁丁的照片了
I think maybe I'd like to... take a picture of yours.
我在想能不能拍一张你的
Come on.
来吧
I want to make you say "Cheese."
我想让你说"茄子"
You're an animal!
你是头野兽
An animal!
一头野兽
This feels good!
感觉真好
Oh, don't stop!
别停
Don't...
别...
Stop.
停
That... did not happen.
这可没发生
I know it's hard to believe,
我知道这很难让人相信
but apparently I'm terrific in the sack.
但很明显我床上技术非常棒
You made that up.
那是你编造的
All right, you got me.
好吧 被你看出来了
Ever since I became a human,
自从我变成了人类
I can't help but lie about my sex life.
我就抑制不住想说关于性生活的谎话
But that's the only untruthful bit
但整个故事里只有这一部分
in the whole story.
是假的
So please...
所以拜托你
will you kill me now?
请你杀了我好吗
You don't believe me, do you?
你不相信我 对吗
I thought I was going to believe you,
我以为我会相信你
but it's all...
但这全都...
it's just too... fantastic.
就是太...太巧合了
It's not fantastic.
这可不是巧合
It's tragic!
这就是悲剧
No, I mean it's just... silly.
不是 我是说这太蠢了
That's my life you're talking about.
你说的可是我的人生
It's my life, too.
也是我的人生
You and me, we're the same, Guy.
你和我 我们都一样 盖
We both want to believe in things that aren't real
我们都愿意相信不真实的东西
or even possible.
甚至不可能存在的东西
"There are more things in Heaven and Earth,
"天地之间有许多事情
than are dreamt of in..."
是你的哲学里..."
"...your philosophy." I know that.
"所没有梦想到的" 我知道
Ah, but did you know the First Folio version reads:
那你知道在《第一对开本》里写的是
"Than are dreamt of in our philosophy"?
"是我们的哲学里所没有梦想到的"吗
So Hamlet is not just calling Horatio an ignorant idiot,
所以哈姆雷特认为无知的不止霍拉旭一个
he's calling us all ignorant idiots?
他是说我们都是无知的笨蛋吗
It's a comforting thought, isn't it?
这让人欣慰 不是吗
Because if there's nothing more to life
因为如果人生中只有
than what we already know,
我们已知的东西
then there's nothing but... worries,
那人生就只剩忧虑
self-doubt,
自我怀疑
regret
悔恨
and loneliness.
和孤独了
Foxman,
福克斯
you've got to put me out of my misery!
你一定要把我从不幸中拯救出来
I don't want to wake up tomorrow and have to go to work!
我不想明早起来又要去工作
What the hell's this?
这是什么
You're the fuzz?
你是条子吗
I'm in town investigating the murders.
我是来调查谋杀案的
And you think I'd do something like that?
你觉得我能做出那种事吗
What kind of a monster do you think I am?
你以为我是怪兽吗
You didn't want to help me,
你根本不想帮助我
you just wanted to arrest me for something I didn't do.
你只想为了我没做的事来逮捕我
Who takes advantage of someone like that?
谁会这么利用别人
A human, that's who.
只有人类做得出来
Human rat fink!
会告密的卑鄙人类
I'm not delusional.
我可没有妄想症
I know what I am.
我知道自己是什么
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