好想做一次（2020）

Never Have I Ever S01E06

Part 4 Sept. 29, 2020, 3:55 p.m.

And even though this family dinner featured humiliation, bickering, threats,
尽管这顿家庭晚餐充斥着羞辱争吵与威胁
and food that was far too spicy,
而且食物还特别辣
it was still a family dinner.
不过它依然是家庭晚餐
And that was pretty cool.
这感觉真是太棒了
Thanks for not ratting me out about Model UN.
谢谢你没把模拟联♥合♥国♥的事说穿
I've kinda been a dick to you lately, so...
最近我对你确实很差劲所以…
I honestly would've deserved it.
就算你报复我也是我活该
Yeah, well, sometimes it's fun to make other people's days as shitty as yours,
有些时候拉人下水确实很爽
but today I didn't have it in me.
但是今天我没兴致
What happened to you?
你怎么了
And why did you cry at my mom's office?
你为什么在我妈办公室哭了
Was it just about the giant herpe on your face?
是因为你脸上那个大疱疹吗
It wasn't a big deal. I was... kinda feeling bummed.
没有什么事情我只是有点… 难过
Why? Did you butler quit?
为什么你家管家辞职了
Hey, I'm trying to be vulnerable here. Also, we don't have butlers anymore.
我在讲难过的事呢而且我们现在没有管家
We call them house managers now. Okay, okay. Sorry.
我们管他们叫房♥屋经理好吧抱歉
Why are you feeling bummed?
那你为什么不开心
I don't know.
我也不知道
I guess sometimes I feel like I'm an NBA player, but...
有时候我感觉自己就像是NBA球星不过...
no matter how many points I score, my dad always ignores me,
可是不管我进多少球我爸爸都不会看我一眼
and my girlfriend only likes me for my money.
我的女朋友跟我在一起也是为了钱
I wish your metaphor had been something more in my wheelhouse,
你的比喻也太不切实际了
like celebrity gossip or YouTube promposals,
你拿名人八卦和油管上的毕业舞会邀请打比喻还差不多
but I think I understand what you're getting at.
不过我大概理解你的意思了
Also, I'm sorry if I messed things up for you and Paxton.
对不起我还把你跟帕克斯顿的关系搞砸了
Oh, you didn't.
那不怪你
Well, maybe if I kept my mouth shut, then you guys would've had a chance.
如果我没有乱说你们两个还有机会在一起
I never had sex with Paxton.
我没跟他上过床
What?
什么
I never had sex with Paxton.
我没跟帕克斯顿上过床
I just let everyone believe that I did.
我只是让大家都信了
Oh! So he's mad at you for lying about having sex with him.
所以他是气你撒了谎
That makes way more sense.
这就有道理了
I mean, we got close to hooking up.
其实我们差一点就做了
Well, as close as you can get without kissing.
也就差没接吻了
He took off his shirt, and I freaked out.
他脱掉了衣服然后我就吓坏了
I know. I'm a loser. Oh, you think you're a loser?
我知道我好失败你觉得你失败
I was so lonely, I got catfished by a middle-aged man yesterday.
昨天我寂寞到被一个中年男人骗了
Ben, you don't have to make up something sadder to make me feel better.
本你不用特地编这种事情来让我好受
For real.
是真的
He was a 50-year-old insurance adjuster from Tarzana,
他50岁了在塔扎纳做保险理算
and he asked me to blow on some pizza.
他让我吹披萨来着
No. Yes. It was messed up.
不是吧是啊简直糟透了
Ben guarded his sadness the same way I guard my Emmy award,
我从来不把艾美奖杯轻易示人本也一样
by burying it deep.
他总是把悲伤埋在心底
I put all of my awards in an underground bunker
我则把我的奖杯和"垃圾桶男孩"卡片
with my Garbage Pail Kids,
放在地下碉堡里
but letting it all hang out there left Ben feeling a little lighter
不过一通宣泄之后本确实感觉好一点了
and ready to face a new day.
他准备好迎接新的一天了
Give me your mechanical pencil.
把你的自动铅笔给我
I need more photos of me looking smart.
这样拍照才显得聪明
Oh. Sure. Yeah.
好的给
So you never have to accept food from a pedo again.
这样就不用吃恋童癖给的食物了
Although on the surface it didn't seem like much had changed,
虽然表面上一切还跟往常一样
today was the least lonely Ben had felt in a long time.
不过今天的本没有以前那么孤单了
Anyways, that about does it for me.
总之以上就是
On behalf of Ben, Devi,
本德维
and the whole gang at Sherman Oaks High School,
和舍曼奧克斯高中的部分
I'm Andy Samberg.
我是安迪·萨姆伯格
McEnroe, back to you.
麦肯罗接下来你继续