市长先生（2021）

市长对话
接下来播放《市长对话》节目
It's "Mayor Chat"
欢迎主持人切特·丹维尔
with your hosts, Chet Danville
和格拉弗·瑟帕维达
and Grover Sepulveda.
现在是周一凌晨4点
It's 4:00 A.M., Monday morning.
我是切特·丹维尔
I'm Chet Danville.
格拉弗·瑟帕维达已经在2003年去世了
Grover Sepulveda died in 2003.
今天来参加节目与我们讨论
Joining us today to talk about
他大力推动的巴士专用车道的
his push for dedicated bus lanes,
是洛杉矶第43届市长 尊敬的尼尔·布里莫
the 43rd mayor of L.A., the Honorable Neil Bremer.
谢谢 切特 为什么要做直播
Thanks, Chet. Why is this live?
另外还有洛杉矶第42届市长
Also joining us is the 42nd mayor of L.A.,
维克多·迪尔加多
Victor Delgado.
天呐 我刚刚都没认出你来
My God. I didn't recognize you.
我还以为你是动物专家什么的呢
I--I thought you were an animal expert or something.
不 公主是研究我的专家还差不多
No, more like Princess is an expert on me.
你卸任后都在做些什么 维克
So what have you been doing since you left office, Vic?
修身养性吧 切特 我经常冥想
Self-care, Chet. I've been meditating.
我快速退出休息了段时间 所以我想出来
I took a Zoom break, so I wanted to come on
让所有的洛杉矶市民们都知道
and let all my fellow Angelenos know
维克多·迪尔加多已经
that Victor Delgado is...
几乎回归正常了
almost back to normal.
听你这么说我真高兴
Oh, that's so good to hear.
在你任职期间 真的是经历了非常艰难的时期
You served during such a difficult time.
是吗
Oh, did I?
谢谢啊 因为我都忘了
Thanks, 'cause I forgot
普拉亚德尔里区的一位女士用空气♥枪♥射我
about when that lady in Playa del Rey shot me with a BB gun
就因为我在分发口罩
for handing out masks.
我上次来参加这节目时
The last time I was on this show,
甚至乞求大家不要喝漂白剂
I was begging people not to drink bleach!
或者喝也可以 但要适量
Or do drink it, but in moderation.
-我明白这工作不好干 但... -你真明白吗
- I know it's a tough job, but-- - Do you?
你做了什么啊
What have you done?
禁止用吸管 推行电动车头盔吗
A straw ban and some scooter helmets?
最终还会有巴士专用车道
And eventually, a bus lane.
那可是很酷的
And that's cool!
摇滚乐队都是乘坐巴士的
Rock bands ride in buses.
那你从哪里获得资金进行建设呢
Uh-huh, and how are you gonna pay for that?
这城市已经破产了
The city's broke.
切特 我觉得你的观众们...
Chet, I-I think your viewers--
-只有一个观众 -海伦有网飞账户
- Viewer, singular. - Helen got Netflix.
我要表达的意思是
Uh, my point is that
肯定会有资金来建设巴士专用车道的
the bus lane will get paid for.
要说谁了解怎么做预算 就是我 尼尔...
If anyone knows how to work a budget, it is me, Neil--
现在是4点02分了 这意味着时间到了
It's now 4:02 and that means we're out of time.
谢谢观看 斯蒂夫 接下来是无节目状态
Thanks for watching, Steve. Up next, static.
市长先生
第一季第九集
你到这里来干什么
What are you doing here?
-学校关了 -关了 为什么
- School's closed. - Closed? For what?
发生了事故
There was an accident.
你没看学校的官方抖音账号♥吗
Did you not see the official school TikTok?
棕榈树树枝掉了些下来
Some palm tree branches fell
把一个女孩砸得失去了意识
and knocked a girl unconscious.
他们就是用这种方式发布重要信息的吗
This is how they disseminate important information?
洛杉矶就是个地狱
L.A. is a damn hellscape,
但却不能怪我
and I am not to blame.
那些棕榈树需要有人定期修理
What--see, those palm trees need to be maintained.
她打算怎么纠正这个失误
What is her plan to rectify this?
-这才是我想知道的 -让我看看
- That's what I wanna know. - Um, let me see.
这些棕榈树归市政管
These palm trees are on city property.
我想问所有攻击我的人一句
So to everyone attacking me,
我们好好想想
let's think.
归根结底这是谁的责任呢
Whose responsibility is this, really?
要是格雷戈里社区有人
If only someone from the Gregory community
在市政厅工作就好了
worked for the city.
他是在说我吗
Is she talking about me?
讽刺
Sarcasm.
古希腊人称之为
What the ancient Greeks called
"莽夫之击"
"Dígma orgizménu adrós estí,"
意思是一个无♥耻♥之人的攻击
the bite of the sassy man.
省省吧 洛杉矶
Give me a break, L.A.
汤米 我们花了多少钱
Hey, Tommy, how much do we spend
维护这座城市的棕榈树
to take care of the city's palm trees?
每年五千万 先生
$50 million a year, sir.
五千万 你知道
50? Do you have any idea
我用这些钱能修多少英里的巴士专用车道吗
how many miles of bus lane I could buy with that?
我敢说肯定很多
A bunch, I'll bet.
先生 我努力唤起大家对这话题的注意
Sir, I have been trying to call attention
已经有好多年了
to this topic for years!
棕榈树本来就不该被种在这座城市
Palm trees are not even supposed to be here.
大多数都是1932年奥♥运♥会时种的
Most of them were planted for the 1932 Olympics
以误导人们相信
to trick people into thinking
洛杉矶并不是缺水的蝎子坟墓
L.A. Wasn't a waterless scorpion graveyard.
所以棕榈树不仅耗钱 还很危险
So palm trees are expensive, dangerous,
并且最初就不应该种的
and they shouldn't be here in the first place.
就跟职业橄榄球大联盟一样 先生
Like an NFL franchise, sir.
他们有减税政策 可以建造花费达50亿美元的体育馆
They get tax breaks to build a $5 billion stadium,
但我们却没钱给流浪汉建造房♥子
but we can't afford housing for the homeless?
等等
Wait.
我之前是为什么怒火满腔来着
What was I furious about before?
-是个好理由 -是棕榈树 阿比
- Eh, it was good. - Palm trees, Arpi.
没错 我们要这么做
Yes! Here's what we do.
雇用流浪汉把棕榈树全都砍掉
Hire the homeless to cut down all the palm trees
扔进体育馆里
and dump them in the stadium.
我们没打算把它们砍掉
We're not chopping them down,
但是整座城市都应该分享花费
but the city should be able to share the cost.
真是大胆的立场 先生
Bold stand, sir.
我这是在讽刺
I'm being sarcastic,
但我说我在讽刺的时候并不是在讽刺
but not when I said I'm being sarcastic.
-那句是非常严肃的 -好了
- That was dead serious. - All right.
早上好
Good morning.
新事项 棕榈树
New agenda item--palm trees.
能全部换成"我们是病毒"的标识牌吗
Can we replace them all with signs that say "We are the virus"?
好了 议程第一项
Okay. First on the agenda,
这上面有人写的是"杰登有大事要宣布"
someone wrote "Jayden's big announcement" on here.
我要当父亲了
I'm gonna be a father!
你指的是你要当天主教神父了吗
Oh, you mean like a Catholic priest?
-这就能说得通了 -这下我明白了
- Oh, that makes sense. - Oh, now I get it.
-要独身禁欲 -不是
- Celibacy. - No!
我要成为一个孩子的爸爸了
I mean a daddy of a baby!
那位幸运的 女士 是谁
Who's the lucky-well, the lady?
我们是在洛杉矶动漫大会上认识的
We met at L.A. Comic-Con.
她打扮成塔莉娅·阿勒古尔在DC的展位上工作
She was working the DC booth dressed as Talia al Ghul.
我当时穿的是海王的装扮服
I was in my Aquaman costume,
所以禁忌的吸引力自然而然就产生了
so the allure of the forbidden was in the air.
杰登 这可真是大好的消息
Well, uh, Jayden, this is wonderful news.
我相信...萨曼西
I'm sure that...Samanthee?
萨曼西一定会是个出色的妈妈
Samanthee will make a terrific mom.
是啊 当然啦
Yeah! Totally!
她已经做了永久性妆容
She already has all her makeup tattooed on
这样她就不用把当妈妈的宝贵时间用来化妆了
so she won't have to waste any mommy time on that.
另外 你们都获邀参加今天下午的婴儿送礼会了
Also, you're all invited to the baby shower this afternoon.
我不想强加性别 所以蛋糕会是灰色的
I don't wanna impose a gender, so the cake will be gray.
好吧 继续 第二项
Okay, moving on. Item two,
"所有人都抱一下杰登"
"Everyone hugs Jayden"?
-绝对不行 -不 我们才不要
- Absolutely not. - No, we're not doing that.
你总会在我的衬衫上留下污渍
You always leave a stain on my shirt.
比工作场合的拥抱让我更不喜欢的只有一样
There's only one thing I like less than workplace hugs,
就是不按照议程进行会议
and that's not following the agenda.
棕榈树
是
很危险的