怪兽上班（2021）

就这样开始吧
Why don't we start with the "Whoo"
一起创造快乐
And work our way to the "Hoo"?
不行吗
No?
来嘛 慢慢来
Just a little "Whoo"? Tiny bit of "Whoo"?
-一点点来嘛 -有着大长角的大家伙
- Teeny tiny "Whoo"? - Big guy with big horns.
泰勒 你好 我叫亚历山大
Tylor, hi. My name's Alexander,
我们将成为最最最好的朋友
and we're gonna be BFF-AE-AE-AE-AE-Fs.
永远的好朋友
That's best friends forever,
永远 永远 永远
and ever and ever, and ever and ever, forever.
我等不及让你带我...
I can't wait for you to show me...
你真幸运 我摊上了弗林特小姐的孩子
Lucky you. I got stuck with Ms. Flint's kid.
弗林特小姐的孩子吗
Ms. Flint's kid?
有其母必有其女啊
The crab apple does not fall far from the tree.
弗林特小姐的孩子
Ms. Flint's kid, as in, Ms. Flint,
是负责搞笑专员面试的那个弗林特小姐吗
the one who's in charge of the auditions Ms. Flint?
是的 弗林特 塔莉亚跟她妈妈真像
Yeah, Flint. Thalia's so much like her mom.
"我这辈子都没笑过"
"I've never cracked a smile in my life."
"不管你说什么 我都不会笑的"
"I'm not gonna smile, no matter what you say,"
"因为我非常严肃"
"'cause I'm so solemn."
弗林特小姐的孩子
Ms. Flint's kid?
医生说他现在看不见那个孩子
The doctor said he couldn't see him right now.
医生的笑话 最佳喜剧
Doctor jokes? Comedy gold!
他可能是怪兽公♥司♥里最有趣的怪兽
Probably the funniest monster at Monsters, Inc.
再给他一次机会吧 妈妈 再给他一次机会
Give him another chance, Mom. Give him another chance!
再给一次机会
Another chance!
我们最新的搞笑专员 泰勒·塔兹曼
Our newest jokester, Tylor Tuskmon.
这是你的裸体鸡
Your naked chicken.
我拼命逗她开心
And I gave her the "Whoo," and the "Hoo"
而她就这么走了
And she just walks away.
-跟我交换吧 -跟谁换
- Trade with me. - Trade with who?
你得跟我换换
You gotta trade with me.
-拜托 帮帮我 -但她被分配给我了
- Please. Come on. Please. Please. - But she was assigned to me.
我们可是大学死党啊
Best friend here. Best friend since college.
-拜托 瓦尔 -她是我负责的
- Please, Val. - To me.
看着我 拜托 拜托 别让我求你
Look at me. Please, please. Don't make me beg. Please.
-但是... -拜托 拜托 拜托
- But, uh... - Please. Please. Please.
*我们要下去啦 下去 下去 下去*
*We're going down. We're going down, down, down*
*去哪里呢*
*We're going where?*
谢谢你跟我换 瓦尔
Thanks for trading, Val.
祝你好运
Good luck!
你好 塔莉亚 我叫泰勒 泰勒·塔兹曼
Hey, there, Thalia. I'm Tylor. Tylor Tuskmon.
记住我的名字吧
Remember my name.
*我们要下去怪兽设团啦 去怪兽设团啦*
*We're going down to MIFT We're going down to MIFT*
维修室
接下来的九个小时...
For the next nine hours...
其中包括午餐时间和两次十五分钟的休息时间
Including lunch and two 15-minute breaks.
我希望你们能把这里当成是你们的
I want you to think of this place as your,
你们的...
um, you know, your, um...
-第二个家 -远离希望的家
- Home away from home? - Your home away from hope.
系好安全带吧
Buckle up.
好 我们来玩"真真假假"吧 我先说
Okay, let's play two truths and a lie. I'll go first.
我十二岁时 吞下了别人的一颗牙齿
When I was 12, I swallowed someone else's tooth.
邓肯的中间名是佩珀里奇
Duncan's middle name's Pepperidge.
我讨厌尝试新事物
And I hate trying new things.
不 我猜你喜欢尝试新事物 对吗
No. I bet you love trying new things, right?
对 你完全猜透了我
Right. You totally get me.
太棒了 -噢耶
- Yes! - Whoo-hoo!
来吧 孩子
And here we are, child.
这里是钢琴家副主管邓肯的办公室
The workplace of Duncan, pianist and deputy supervisor.
我叫奥斯卡 不叫"孩子"
My name is Oscar, not child.
你对弗利兹的工作没什么兴趣吧
You don't have any interest in Fritz's job, do you?
-是的 -那你不介意
- No. - Then you wouldn't mind
签个简单的合同让你的回应合法化吧
signing a simple contract to legalize your response.
如果你不介意在我的合同上签字
If you don't mind signing my contract
免除我的所有责任 我就签
releasing me from all liability for my actions.
我喜欢你的风格 孩子
I like your style, kid.
正如你所见 马库斯 这里有很多设备
And as you can see Marcus, there is plenty of equipment in here
它们可能会导致事故
that could result in a workplace accident.
有人发生过事故吗
Has anyone ever had an accident?
那可不止一个人
You mean anyones?
克劳斯 罗德尼 卡尔
Klaus, Rodney, Carl,
都是一些因安全措施不当
oh, just a few of the casualties
造成的伤亡 朋友
of improper safety procedures, my friend.
这些东西是活的吗
Was this alive?
那得看你怎么定义"活的"
Depends on your definition of alive.
是的 我每次都会保留一些纪念品
Yep. I keep a little souvenir of each.
那既是对不安全事故的提醒
Both as a reminder of the unsafe incident,
也是用来打发我的空闲时间
and as a unique use of my leisure time.
它动了
It moved.
正宗的清凉爽口饮
Now, the original Drooler Cooler
是用真口水做的
was made from real drool.
而不是他们现在用的那种高果糖玉米糖浆
Not the high gooptose horn syrup that they use today.
你肯定不知道吧
I bet you didn't know that.
你不太爱说话 对吗
You're not much of a talker, are you?
-你想听个笑话吗 -不想
- You wanna hear a joke? - Nope.
好吧 有一只狮鹫兽
Okay. So, a griffin,
一只鼻涕虫和一只水螅去了一家桌球酒吧
a slug and a hydra walk into a dive bar.
等等 不 这个不太合适
Wait, no, that's... That might not be appropriate.
-也许... -这桌子对你来说似乎有点小
- Um, oh, maybe, uh... - This desk seems small for you.
因为这不是我的办公桌 只是临时的
Oh, that's because it's not my desk, it's my temporary desk.
我本来要成为一名惊吓专员
You see, I was gonna be a scarer,
然后欢笑电力...
then the whole Laugh Power thing...
又是一个惊吓专员
Another scarer.
-真棒 -等等 这以前是香蕉面包的办公桌
- Great. - Wait. It used to be Banana Bread's desk.
我是说温彻斯特 他的名字叫温彻斯特
I mean, Winchester. His name is Winchester.
对 那个叫温彻斯特的家伙
Oh, yeah, yeah. The Winchester guy.
-我妈老是提到他的绝赞搞笑理论 -等等
- My mom mentioned his amazing comic theory. - Wait.
等一下 你妈妈是弗林特小姐
Stop the clock. Your mom's Ms. Flint?
我还真不知道
I did not know that.
真是太奇怪了 我是说
That is so weird. I mean,
因为我想当搞笑专员 而你妈妈...
because I wanna be a jokester, and your mom's like...
我能直接去我妈办公室吗
Can I just go to my mom's office?
为什么要那样
Why would you do that?
你会跟我玩得很开心的
Look, you're gonna be having so much fun with me,
开心到你都不想回去
you're not gonna wanna go back.
就把我当成你的搞笑叔叔
Just think of me as like your, you know, your fun uncle.
我以前有个搞笑叔叔 他死了
I had a fun uncle. He's dead.
节哀顺变
I'm sorry for your loss.
怪兽设团人和小怪兽设团人 行动起来
MIFTers and mini MIFTers, look alive,
我们收到工单了
because we've got a work order.
-我们把孩子弄丢了 -抱歉
- We lost our kid. - Sorry.
什么叫你们把孩子弄丢了
What do you mean you lost your kid?
工单上说是要修一个坏的垃圾桶轮
The work order said it's a broken trash can wheel.
斯密提追孩子的时候绊倒弄坏的
It broke when Smitty tripped over it chasing after our kid.
那个小鼻涕虫跑得可快了
Yeah, that little slugger's fast.
这和我们去年弄丢孩子一样糟糕
This is as bad as when we lost the kid from last year.
-还有前年 -还有大前年
- And the year before that. - And the year before that.
我们最后全找回来了
Well, we eventually found all of 'em.
大概吧
I think.
只有我一个人觉得应该叫保安吗
Um, am I the only one who thinks we should call security?
等等 这孩子长什么样
Wait wait wait. What does this kid look like?
他就长那样
He looks like that!
怪兽设团人 还有你们的小怪兽设团人
MIFTers, you and your mini MIFTers,
去门井里找
search the door shafts.
格蒂 咱们去DVC
Gerty, you and I are heading for the DVC.
-"DVC" -门控制室
- "DVC"? - The Door Vault Control.
-来吧 -咱们走
- Come on. - Let's go.
我 可我不是怪兽设团人
Me? But I'm not a MIFTer.
今天你要跟我们一起
Today, you're with us.
小吉布斯可能在任何地方
Little Gibbs could be anywhere.
瓦尔 你去北区 泰勒 你去南区