怪兽上班（2021）

我喜欢读未开封的信件
I enjoy reading unopened mail.
让我觉得我有真正的朋友
Makes me feel like I have actual friends.
那很有意思 也可能违法
Oh, yeah, no, that's very interesting, and most likely illegal.
不过听我说 我随便想到的
But, um, hey, look, I was thinking, random thought. Uh...
麦克和萨利会很想
Mike and Sulley would love
吃到你拿手的冰激凌
to have one of your famous snow cones, right?
-我说得对吗 -好主意
- Am I right? - There's a good idea.
在炎炎夏日 透心凉的冰激凌
Yeah. Nothing says "un-banish me"
最能表达"别驱逐我"的意思了
like a cold snow cone on a hot day.
我们走 走吧
So, let's go. Let's keep it moving.
好 我们到了
Okay, here we are. Here we are.
你和我一起去吗
You, uh, comin' with me?
不 你去 你自己去
Oh. Uh, no, no. You go. Just you.
我待在这里
I'm gonna stay here.
确保那扇旧门不出问题
Make sure nothing goes wrong with the, um, old door, so...
对 很明智
Oh. Yeah, yeah. Good thinking.
你想知道那个雪怪被驱逐的原因
So you wanna know why this Abominable was banished?
我全部档案搜遍了
I searched all the files,
但所有关于沃特努斯的都被抹去了
but everything of Waternoose's was wiped clean.
既然萝丝对这里所发生的的事一清二楚
And since Roz knew everything that went on here,
她又是一把手
and she was number one,
我就想着来找...二把手
I thought I'd come to... number two?
雅克主要吃草和野花
Yaks mostly eat grass and wildflowers,
有些人以为他们有四个胃
and some people think they have four stomachs.
其实他们只有一个胃 里面有四个间室
But they really have one stomach with four compartments.
-真的吗 -所产的奶很美味
- Really? - And the milk... Delicious.
但你知道什么最能让味蕾跳动吗
But you know what really gets the taste buds hoppin'?
雅克酸奶
Yak yogurt.
你能不能别再叨逼叨雅克的事 拜托了
Okay, could you just stop with the yak yakking yak? Okay? Please?
今天是我成为搞笑专员的大好机会
Today was my big chance to be a jokester.
搞笑专员是什么东东
"Jokester"? What's a jokester?
对了 你不 ...
That's right. You don't...
现在是笑声发电 不再用惊吓发电了
It's laugh power now. No more scare power.
-真的吗 -我本来要当惊吓专员
- Really? - I was gonna be a Scarer,
但现在我要想去那层楼
but now my only chance
就必须得让小孩发笑
to get on that floor is to make a kid laugh.
是啊 我懂你的感受 孩子
Yeah, I know how you feel, kid.
意为随遇而安 苦中作乐
但是当生活给你扔了个雪球
But when life throws you a snowball,
那就做个甜筒
make snow cones.
好了 回去吧
Okay. Back in you go.
谢谢你放我们下来
Hey, thanks for lettin' us down.
如果你要吃人 就先吃她
If you're gonna eat someone, eat her first.
不知道谁在这放了个陷阱 但你们要当心啊
Don't know who put this snare here, but watch your step.
这可是安全隐患
That's a safety hazard.
好了 你现在真该去了
Okay, you should really get going now, all right?
你去给麦克和萨利拿甜筒 好吗
You go get those snow cones, all right? For Mike and Sulley.
你就赶紧去搞笑层吧 未来的搞笑专员
And you. You need to get to that Laugh Floor, future jokester.
你知道吗
You know,
这真的很棒
it's really nice.
棒
Nice?
有人在背后支持你
Nice havin' someone that's got your back.
泰勒 你是个好朋友
Tylor, you're a good friend.
终于回到他该待的地方了 好走不送
Well, back where he belongs, and good riddance.
干嘛
What?
有话快说
If you have something to say, say it.
我看没有
I didn't think so.
泰泰
Double T.
-瓦尔 我得走了 -我知道真♥相♥了
- Val, I... I gotta go. - I found out what happened.
他被驱逐的原因
Why he was banished.
-我不听 -他没有吃戴尔 也没偷车
- No. - He didn't eat Dale, or steal cars,
也没喝尖叫能量 他没伤害任何人
or drink screams. He never hurt anybody.
我不明白 那他为什么会被驱逐
I don't understand. Then why was he be banished?
他看到了沃特努斯的一封信
He saw a letter from Waternoose
信里说要开♥发♥一种从小孩体内榨取尖叫的机器
about plans for a machine that would extract screams from kids.
他知道了尖叫提炼机的事
He knew about the Scream Extractor.
从那以后 沃特努斯就把他永远驱逐了
After that, Waternoose banished him for life.
但他只是想要个朋友
But he just wanted a friend.
泰勒 快来啊
Hey, Tylor, get in here.
我们马上就供够电了
We've just about met the power demand,
而你还没上榜呢
and you're not even on the board.
笑声总量 搞笑层
这孩子超喜欢 你真该听听他的笑声
The kid loved it. You should have heard him laugh.
谁知道卡拉和那朵会喷液体的花居然这么搞笑
Who knew Carla and that liquid-emitting flora was so funny?
-我喜欢惊喜 -我...
- I love surprises. - I, uh...
我得走了
I gotta go.
塔兹曼先生 你可以进去了
Mr. Tuskmon, you're good to go.
抱歉
Sorry.
给你
Here.
萨利 这扇门很眼熟
Sulley, this door looks very familiar.
-新鲜甜筒 人人有份 -有柠檬和越橘味
- Snow cones for everybody! - We've got lemon and lingonberry.
零卡路里 纯正雪味
And zero-calorie snow-flavored.
可爱雪人 你怎么在这
Adorable, what are you doing here?
来得正好
Perfect timing.
这么热的天 我肯定要来个甜筒
With this heat, I could sure use a snow cone.
伙计们 好多年没见了
Guys, it's been years.
我们上个月还在你的山洞里
We were in your cave a month ago.
是啊 但是雪人历已经过了好多年
Yeah, but it's that's a long time in Yeti years.
来个甜筒吗
Snow cone?
这可太凉快了
What a way to cool off.
这些柠檬味有点酸
And these lemon ones, they're a little tart.
嘴里感觉怪怪的
Makes my mouth feel funny.
这都是我朋友泰勒的主意
Yeah, it was all my friend Tylor's idea.
萨利 麦克 我觉得可爱雪人
Um, Sulley, Mike, I feel like Adorable here
已经被驱逐够久了
has been banished long enough.
而且还是因为知道了尖叫提炼机
More like unjustly banished by Waternoose
被沃特努斯恶意驱逐
for discovering the Scream Extractor.
尖叫提炼机
Scream Extractor?
难怪他要除掉你
No wonder he wanted to get rid of you.
你不该被流放的 你应该受到奖励
You shouldn't have been banished, you should've been rewarded.
你说的对 麦克
You're right, Mike.
可爱雪人 现在我以怪兽公♥司♥总裁的名义
Adorable, now that I'm CEO of Monsters Incorporated,
宣布对你取消驱逐
I hereby un-banish you.
听到没 正式取消驱逐了
You hear that? Officially un-banished.
-太好了 -而且你就别去收发室了
- Yes! - And no more mail room for you.
你将晋升为...
You're getting a promotion as...
怪兽公♥司♥官方冰淇淋销♥售♥员
Official snow cone seller of Monsters Incorporated.
-我要柠檬味 -我也是
- I'll have lemon. - Make that two.
-给你 -恭喜你 卡拉
- There you go. - Congratulations, Carla.
明天在搞笑层见你和你的搞笑花
I'll see ya and your funny flower tomorrow on the Laugh Floor.
太感谢了
Oh, thanks.
你错过机会真是太可惜了
Sorry you missed your chance.
还会有机会的 我可不会放弃
I'll get another one. It's me, remember?
再说了 当生活给你扔了个雪球
Besides, when life throws you a snowball,
那就做个甜筒
you make a snow cone.
麦克的喜剧课
好了 今天我们要讨论
Okay, today we're going to discuss
笑话里最关键的部分
the most crucial component of a joke.
在这一行 它被称为...
In the business, it's known as the...
凯特琳 你得等到...
Kaitlyn... You need to wait until the...
不对 咱们说过了
No, no, we discussed this...
彩排的时候
In rehearsal.
请别...
Please don't...
等到...等到我们...
Until we... Until we get...
等我讲到笑点再敲
Until we get to the punch line!
现在超大拳击手套本该...
This is where the giant boxing glove is supposed...
现在 凯特琳 就是现在
Now, Kaitlyn. Now!
你听过这个笑话吗 有只怪兽
Say, did you hear the one about the monster
背了只牦牛去看医生
who walked into the doctor's office with a yak on his back?
医生说 "你怎么了"
The doctor says, "What's wrong?"
那个怪兽说 "我好像被牦牛[唠叨]缠上了"
And the monster says, "I think I've got a yak problem."
谢了 凯特琳