迈克和茉莉（2010）

Mike & Molly S06E12

Part 2 Dec. 15, 2020, 4:51 p.m.

in this cage before my eyes go wonky.
我得先让自己忙起来
What?
什么
I'm just trying to take my mind off of stuff.
我就是想让自己想想别的东西
Have you tried meditation?
你试过冥想吗
Or getting real drunk?
或是大醉一场
So when the adoption agency calls, I'm gonna be blotto?
等到领养中心打过来时我正喝个烂醉
Is that what you want?
你们真的想要这样吗
I can see my reflection.
我能看到我的倒影
You're gonna have to start wearing underwear in here.
你得开始穿内♥裤♥了
Why? I'm just as waxed as this floor.
为什么我下面光得和地板一样啊
Don't worry, Vince, I'll get the door.
别担心 Vince 我来开门好了
All right, I figured you want to keep busy.
好的我就猜到你想找点事做
Is there a baby yet?
孩子有了吗
Yeah, Peggy.
有了 Peggy
Meet your grandchild. He's right there on the couch.
这就是你孙子坐在沙发上的那个
This whole adoption process is ridiculous.
这整个领养程序太可笑了
You know, if you were a celebrity,
要是你是个名人
this house would be swimming in Third World babies.
第三世界的宝宝会把房♥子淹没了
Well, if you're open to that, I know a guy
要是你们愿意的话我认识个人
who can get his hands on just about anything.
要什么就能弄到什么
Got me the socks Saddam Hussein was wearing when they hung him.
给我弄到过萨♥达♥姆♥吊死时穿的袜子
Get out of here.
滚出去 (别乱说了)
No, I'm serious.
不我是说真的
I got the certificate of authenticity and everything.
我还拿到了真品证书之类的东西
No, get out of here.
不我让你滚出去
Get out of here.
滚出去
Get out of here!
滚出去
God, do you ever want to just kill somebody?
天啊你有没有想杀个人的时候
Everybody. All the time.
想杀每个人无时无刻
You know, I wouldn't say this in front of Mike,
我不敢在Mike面前说这话
but I'm starting to think this is not gonna happen.
但我开始觉得这事不会成真了
Of course it's gonna happen.
这当然会成真
You don't know that.
你又不知道
Yes, I do, 'cause I got faith.
我知道因为我心中有信念
Which is exactly what you need.
这恰恰是你欠缺的
Grab your coat, you're coming with me.
拿着外套跟我走一趟
Where? I'm taking you to my friend's house.
去哪我带你去我朋友家
My buddy God and his little boy Jesus.
我朋友上帝和他家的小耶稣家
Oh, I-I appreciate what you're doing,
我很感谢你这么做
but, uh, I'm not really tight with those guys.
但我跟他们不熟
Well, I am.
我熟啊
I've done a lot of dirty work for our Lord.
我为上帝做了很多黑活
It's time for him to pay up.
也是时候回报我了
And bring your mother and sister, too.
也带上你妈和你妹妹
You'll look better in his eyes if they're next to you.
她们在你旁边你的形象会更高大
Makes sense. I mean...
有道理
I get that.
我懂了
You know what? Mom? Victoria?
等一下妈 Victoria
We're going to church!
我们要去教堂了
Please tell me that's the name of a new club.
请告诉我这是一家新的酒吧名
No, it's the real deal.
不是我们说真的
It's for the baby.
为了宝宝嘛
I'll put on underwear.
我去穿内♥裤♥
I feel a little nervous being here.
到这来有点小紧张
I've done some sinful things in my life.
我人生中还是作了一些孽
I've done sinful things in the last two hours.
两小时前我刚作了点孽
I know, Mom. We have thin walls.
我知道妈墙不怎么隔音
It doesn't matter. That's the beauty of religion.
又没有关系这就是信教的好处
You can do all sorts of unnatural acts
你可以尽情作孽
and come in here and...
来这里然后
clean-slate it.
从头清零
God is forgiving.
上帝是宽容的
Not the God I pray to.
我祈祷的上帝可不这样
You want forgiveness?
你想得到宽恕
Go to the hippie Lutheran joint down the street.
那还是去街尾的嬉皮路德会吧
The God that lives here is angry and vengeful.
这里的上帝又愤怒复仇心又重
Well, then is he really the one to help us?
那他真的适合来帮助我们吗
Vince has got a guy who can get us a baby and a 60-inch plasma.
Vince不是认识个人能给我们弄来宝宝和60英寸等离子电视嘛
No, this is gonna work.
不这样能行的
You just got to do exactly as I say.
按照我说的话做就行了
Here. A St. William Medal.
给圣威廉的吊坠
Patron Saint of adoption.
收养孩子的守护神
Are you seriously telling me that if I wear that,
你的意思是如果我带上这个吊坠
I'm gonna get a baby?
我就能得到一个宝宝了吗
Don't be ridiculous, it's not magic.
别荒唐了这又不是魔法
You got to wear it for a few days, spit on it,
你得带几天在上面吐口水
and bury it in the backyard.
然后埋在你们后院
Then you get a baby.
然后才会得到一个宝宝
Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah.
是嘛真是有道理啊
Anything we can do?
我们能帮上忙吗
A rain dance? Jump in a volcano?
跳个祈雨舞还是跳个火山
You want to jump in a volcano, I'm not going to stop you.
你要是想跳火山我也不会拦你的
Peggy, it's real sweet of you to try to help,
Peggy 你想帮忙真是太贴心了
but I don't think Molly is, like, really going to...
但是我觉得Molly不会真的
Bup-bup-bup-bup. Okay.
不不不不好的
How many days, how much spit,
要带几天吐多少口水
and how deep do I have to bury it?
要埋多深才行啊
I can't believe you dragged me to this place.
真不敢相信你把我拖到这儿来
Just relax, okay? We're gonna hear what she says,
放松点好吗我们就听听她怎么说
and if you don't like it, we'll leave.
如果你觉得不好我们就走
That sounds like the same thing you said when you tricked me
上次你骗我去听什么房♥产分时使用推广会
into going to that time-share thing.
你也是这样跟我说的
Man, we had to stay until the first break
我们得坚持听到第一次中场休息
or we wouldn't have got the rolling suitcases.
不然人家就不送我们那个拉杆箱啊
Hello, Carl.
你好 Carl
I see you brought a friend.
我发现你带了个朋友啊
Ah, I told you she was good.
我说过她很厉害吧
Uh, Mike, this is Madame Vianne.
Mike 这是Vianne夫人
Madame Vianne, my best friend and spiritual brother,
Vianne夫人这是我死党和我精神上的兄弟
Mike Biggs.
Mike Biggs
Nice to meet you.
很高兴见到你
But, just to be clear, uh, I-I didn't want to come.
不过先说清楚我并不想来
Oh, I sensed that.
我感觉的到
Mm, very intuitive. Shut up.
恩直觉很厉害闭嘴
But you wouldn't have come at all
但是如果你不想寻求答案
unless you were looking for answers.
你根本就不会来
True.
确实
I sense there's a hole
我感觉到有个空洞
and you're waiting for something to fill it.
你在等待着什么来填补它
Something you fear will never come.
你怕永远也等不到
Mm-hmm.
嗯哼
And it's not just affecting you,
而且这件事不但对你有影响
it's affecting someone you love very much.
也深深的影响了你爱的人
Mm-hmm.
嗯哼
And if this hole is filled,
如果这个空洞被填补上了
it will make the two of you happier than you've ever been.
会让你们两个前所未有的幸福
Mm-hmm.
嗯哼
Didn't I tell you she was good?
我跟你说过她很厉害吧
Mm-hmm.
嗯哼
Look, I'm just gonna be straight.
好吧我就直说了吧
I, uh, I just jumped on your bandwagon this afternoon,
今天下午我贸贸然的就上了你的贼船
but you know that and...
不过你已经知道了而且
Had my issues with you in the past: the...
以前我确实对你有点意见
the wars and the diseases.
因为战争啦疾病啦
I mean, come on, the Cubs.
还有芝加哥小熊队也太烂了吧拜托
But I think we can put all that aside
但是我觉得我们可以一笑泯恩仇
and just kind of get Mama a baby.
赶紧给老娘个宝宝吧
Amen. Please and... thank you. Yes.
阿门求你了谢谢你
What are you doing? What?
你干什么呢什么
Are you praying? No.
你在祈祷吗不是