迈克和茉莉（2010）

Mike & Molly S06E08

Part 2 Dec. 15, 2020, 4:50 p.m.

From now on, it's all boats, all the time.
现在好了都是船了
I hope he doesn't get seasick of it.
希望他可别晕船哈
Get it?
明白吗
I do get it,
我明白
and so do you.
你也有礼物哟
Happy belated.
迟到的祝福哈
Oh, you shouldn't have.
你太客气了
No, it's...
不是这是个
it's a bong.
是个大♥麻♥烟筒
But I'm glad you did.
但是很高兴收礼物
I think it's sweet, the two of them
他俩一起做个小工程
doing this little project together.
我觉得挺好的
I thought you hated that boat.
我以为你讨厌那艘船呢
You told Vince that ship's the last thing
你跟Vince说那艘船
he'll be going down on.
就是他最后上的东西了
Now it goes back.
拿回来了哈
Let me tell you a secret about marriage:
我跟你说个婚姻的秘密吧
when your husband wants something,
当你的老公想要什么东西的时候
always say no first.
永远要先说不
It's all about give and take.
这都是取舍的套路
If they think you're giving them something,
如果他们觉得是你允许他们做某件事
you can take whatever you want.
那你可以随时改变主意
It works great for cults and pyramid schemes too.
邪教和金字塔骗局就是这样运行的很好啊
Say what you will,
随你怎么说
but know what I saw when they dragged that piece of junk
但是知道当我看到这垃圾被拖进车♥库♥的时候
up the driveway?
我想的是什么吗
Two tickets to Tom Jones.
Tom Jones的演唱会票
I've already picked out the thong I'm gonna throw.
我已经挑选好要扔上台的丁字裤了
Since when do you wear underwear?
你什么时候开始穿内♥裤♥了
Funerals, Tom Jones.
葬礼了去看Tom Jones我都穿
Look, I want to go on your boat,
我很想上你的船
but this thing makes me look like an idiot.
但是带着这个太傻了吧
Can't I just wear my little arm floaties?
我就不能穿我的臂式救生圈吗
Sorry, man, ship's rules.
抱歉了伙计船有船规
Every passenger has to have their own life vest.
每位乘客都要有自己的救生衣
What about you? I'm crew.
那你呢我是船员
I'm not wearing that ridiculous thing.
我才不♥穿♥这可笑玩意儿呢
Wait till you see this boat, Carl.
等你看那船你就明白了 Carl
She's a thing of beauty.
真是个美人儿啊
I'm telling you, Vince really knows his stuff.
告诉你吧 Vince真的很懂船
Yeah, you two have been getting pretty close
我知道你俩在修船的时候
during this little Sea-do re-do.
建立了深厚感情
You know, we have.
没错确实是
And that's the magic of this boat.
这都是船的魔力啊
She showed me Vince in a completely different light,
她让我看到了Vince完全不同的一面
and I'm proud to call him my captain.
我很骄傲可以叫他"船长"
I'm happy for you.
真为你高兴
And for me.
还有为我自己
'Bout time you found somebody else to look up to.
也是你去崇拜别人的时候了
What are you talking about?
你说什么呢
Well, in my quiet way,
这么多年来
I've given you guidance all these years.
我一直静静地给你人生的指引
OK, one, you've never been quiet,
好吧第一你从来就不是静静的
and two, the only thing you've given me
第二你唯一给我的
is a bad case of hemorrhoids.
就是严重的痔疮
And I'll always be there for you, Mike.
我永远在你背后哈 Mike
Just like your hemorrhoids.
就像你的痔疮
Look, what Vince and I have is different, you know?
Vince和我的关系是不一样的
I actually think he kind of sees me like a son.
我觉得他真的把我当儿子看了
Yeah? That's sweet.
是吗挺贴心
Yeah, if I can make his life a little happier
是啊如果我配合他能让他的生活
by playing along, so be it.
开心一点那就这样吧
You're a good man, Mike Biggs.
你是个好人 Mike Biggs
Thank you.
谢谢你
I taught you well. Wear your floaties and your vest,
我把你教的很好穿上你的救生圈和救生衣
you're going overboard.
你要被推下海了
Okay, now bear in mind, it still needs a little more work.
好了记住哈还没彻底完工呢
Got it.
明白了
Okay, and I might have talked it up a little more than I should've.
还有也许我有点夸大其词
It doesn't look exactly like the boat from Jaws. Oh.
它不是很像<大白鲨>里那条船哈噢
You're still gonna buy a harpoon gun though, aren't you?
但是你还是会买♥♥个鱼枪的吧
Oh, yeah. I don't care if we never use it,
当然不管用不用我都要买♥♥
it's just gonna look cool. Yeah.
反正看起来很酷是啊
Okay.
好吧
Here she is.
她就在里面了
That's a great trick, now make it reappear.
真是牛逼的魔术哈现在把她变回来吧
What's going on? Where is it?
怎么回事船跑哪儿了
Hey, fellas.
嘿伙计们
Vince, what the hell happened?
Vince 怎么回事
Where's the boat?
船跑哪儿了
Oh, you'll never believe it. Somebody actually bought that hunk of junk.
不敢相信竟然有人买♥♥了那一堆废铜烂铁
What?
什么
It was the craziest thing.
这事太妙了
The mailman's at the box, he sees the boat.
邮差站在邮箱旁边的时候看到了那条船
I give him this whole BS spiel
我跟他乱吹一通
about taking her out fishing on Lake Michigan.
说我把她开到密歇根湖上钓鱼
Like the one you gave me?
就像你之前跟我说的
Exactly!
正是
That sucker swallowed it hook, line, and sinker.
那个傻子完全相信了我
Offered me three times what I paid for it.
出了我买♥♥的三倍价钱
Next thing I know,
紧接着
the mailman's towing behind his tiny Jeep.
邮差就用他的小吉普把船拖走了
It-it looked like a little ant
看起来就像是一只小蚂蚁
pulling a French fry.
在拖一根薯条
Why didn't you call me?
你为什么不给我打电♥话♥
Well, why would I call you about me selling my boat?
我卖♥♥自己的船为什么要给你打电♥话♥
Because we worked on it together.
因为这船是我们两人一起修的
Believe me, that did not go unnoticed.
相信我我都看在眼里了
You worked hard,
你工作很努力
you deserve a tickle.
这些小费是你应得的
It's not about the money,
这不是钱的问题
you jackass!
你这个混♥蛋♥
Well, it was just a bunch of boards and a motor.
那就是一堆板子和一个马达
What are you getting so cheesed off about?
你到底为什么这么不高兴
Because I'm a bigger sucker than the mailman.
因为我比那个邮差更傻
This is for the bright-orange, non-refundable life vest.
这钱是为了这个橙黄色不可退换的救生衣
Okay.
好了
Where's Mike?
Mike在哪儿
Why would you think he was here?
你为什么觉得他在这里
Well, his car's in the driveway, his shoes are by the door,
他的车停在车道里他的鞋就在门旁边
and you're holding a big corner piece of lasagna.
而且你手里拿着一大块千层面的边角
That's pretty much the smoking gun right there.
这就是确凿的证据
Look, I don't know what you two were fighting about,
我不知道你们俩在吵什么
but he's right and you owe him an apology.
但是他是对的你要跟他道歉
We are not fighting.
我们没有吵架
Well, he's upset about something.
反正他因为什么事儿心烦着呢
He marched right upstairs to his old bedroom
径直杀到楼上自己的卧室
and has been playing records on his hi-fi ever since.
一直开着录音机听音乐
He's playing records on his hi-fi?
他开着录音机听音乐
Is he gonna go to the sock-hop after that?
他之后是不是还要去参加短袜舞会
He was never invited to the sock-hop.
他从来没有被邀请去短袜舞会
It's a damn shame.
真是可惜
He was the best dancer in that school.
以前在学校的时候他的舞跳得最好
He used to throw me around like a rag doll.
经常把我像个布娃娃一样舞得团团转
Please don't give me those visuals.
不要让我想到那个画面
Well, if you didn't drive him back into mama's arms,
如果不是你把他逼回妈妈的怀抱
what did?
那是谁
Vince sold his boat.
Vince把他的船卖♥♥了
Mike had a boat?
Mike有船吗
No, Vi...
不 Vi