迈克和茉莉（2010）

Mike & Molly S06E07

Part 2 Dec. 15, 2020, 4:49 p.m.

Just sitting there.
就那么坐着
On the floor.
在地上
Isn't that cute?
多可爱啊
It's adorable.
是很可爱
Just like the last ten pictures you showed me,
就像你刚才给我看过的十张照片一样可爱
and the two-minute video of her drinking out of the toilet.
还有长达两分钟她在马桶里喝水的视频
She opened the lid and everything, by herself.
她能自己打开盖子都是她自己做的
This dog is smart, Carl.
这只狗很聪明 Carl
Scary smart.
聪明的吓人
You know, for something that you got to return
对于一个过几天你就要
in a couple of days, don't you think
还给人家的东西你不觉得
you might be getting a little too attached to it?
你投入太多感情了吗
Okay, first of all,
好吧首先
that something has a name.
这个东西是有名字的
Birdie.
Birdie
And yes,
没错
I have fallen hard for her.
我是陷的太深了
So, please, let me just enjoy what little time we have left.
所以就让我享受一下我们仅剩不多的时间吧
All right.
好吧
I know better than to get between a man and someone else's dog.
我不至于连别插手一个男人和别人的狗的事都不知道
You know, when Molly and me finally move into our own place,
等Molly和我有了自己的地方
the first thing I'm gonna do? Buy a puppy.
你知道我第一件事要干啥嘛买♥♥条狗
Yeah, well, hopefully that one won't hate Molly.
好吧希望那条狗不讨厌Molly
I don't know what that is.
我也不明白怎么回事
Birdie loves everyone.
Birdie谁都喜欢
Even Joyce, who growls every time the poor pooch walks by.
连Joyce也喜欢她可是每次看见狗狗就咆哮呢
Well, you know, dogs are very intuitive.
狗狗们的直觉是很厉害的
You know? They can sense things we can't
它们能感觉到我们感觉不到的事
and know things about people... we don't.
能看透我们看不透的人
What are you trying to say, Carl? I'm just saying,
你想说什么 Carl 我只是说
how much do we really know about this Molly?
我们到底有多了解Molly呢
The only thing she hides from me are Visa bills.
她唯一瞒着我的就是信♥用♥卡♥账单
Unless Birdie can sniff out bad credit, you're crazy.
除非Birdie能闻出来不良信用否则你就是在说疯话
All right. But Birdie's onto something.
好吧但是Birdie肯定是知道些什么
You might have married yourself a cat person.
你可能娶了个喜欢猫的人
Don't you dare say that!
你竟敢这么说
What's wrong with a cat?
猫有什么不好的
They're jerks. And they don't care who knows it.
它们都是混♥蛋♥ 而且不在乎别人的看法
Because they're jerks.
因为它们就是混♥蛋♥
Yeah, but see, that's why I like 'em.
是啊但是就因为这样我才喜欢猫啊
You know? Make you earn their love.
懂不让你去争取它们的爱
Might have something to do with my low self-esteem,
可能跟我的自卑有关吧
but I do enjoy a standoffish kitty.
但是我就喜欢冷漠的猫
As long as she's not a bird person.
只要她不是喜欢养鸟就行
Now, those people, they're just weird.
那些人就是怪胎啊
Look at this one.
看看这张
Oh, no, that's Vince's head.
噢不是那是Vince的头
I can't believe the sweater fit.
真不敢相信毛衣居然这么合身
I told you.
早跟你说过
Made that when you were just six months old.
你六个月的时候我织的
You outgrew it in a week.
一个星期你就穿不上了
Look at her.
看看她
Look at the boss.
看看老大
You are just a lovebug.
你真是个小可爱
You're gonna have to come spend a weekend at Grandma's,
你得来奶奶家过个周末
so I can spoil you rotten.
让我好好宠宠你
Well, don't get too attached.
别太亲热了
Remember, I gotta take her back in a couple days.
记住过几天我就得把她送回去了
Oh... Can we not talk about Birdie leaving, please?
能不能别提Birdie要走的事
You're getting her all worked up.
你会让她不安的
Mike, look what Birdie did to my shoe.
Mike 看看Birdie对我的鞋做了什么好事
Oh, no.
噢不
Did she eat some leather?
她吃了皮革吗
Are you okay, girl?
你没事吧宝贝
Oh, I'll grab her some charcoal.
我去给她拿点木炭
We'll-we'll get her to throw up.
得让她吐出来
Wait, what are we going to do about this?
等等那这个该怎么办
Well, maybe not leave your clodhoppers laying around.
最好别把你的破鞋到处乱放
Poor baby could have choked on that ugly shoe.
那丑鞋可能会把这小可怜噎死的
We should puppy-proof the whole house.
我们应该把这屋子做上狗狗安全措施
Any mistake she makes is really our fault.
任何她犯的错误其实都是我们造成的
Or maybe we could leave her in the crate
或者没人看管的时候
while we're not watching her, like we talked about.
应该像之前说好的那样把她关在笼子里
You can't put her in a crate. That's cruel.
你不能把她关到笼子里太残忍♥了
It's not cruel. It's a dog crate.
不残忍♥啊那就是狗狗笼子
It's a crate specifically made to put a dog into.
专门为狗狗设计的笼子
People also put dogs in sacks and toss them in the river.
人们还把狗放在袋子里扔到河里呢
Should we do that, too? Oh, my God!
我们要不要也那样做我的天哪
I'm not saying kill the dog.
我可没说要杀狗
Mike, back me up here.
Mike 帮我说句话
Ma, I won't let her kill the dog.
老妈我不会让她杀狗的
I-- no!
我不是
I have never said kill the dog!
我从没说过要杀狗啊
I'm just trying to keep this mutt
我只是不想让这混♥蛋♥狗
from chewing her way through my entire closet.
把我整个衣橱都咬穿
You stay out of this.
你少掺和
Just asking, if this was a cat, would you feel differently?
就问一句如果这是只猫你会不会另眼相待呢
What?
什么
I'm gonna take her outside until this one stops screaming.
我把她先带出去等这位不叫唤了再回来
I'm not scr...!
我没大声
I am not screaming.
我没大叫
Boy, treat a poor dog like this,
这样对待这只可怜的狗
I guess we can see what kind of mother you'd be.
我想我们都可以想象你会是一个怎样的母亲
She's not allowed back in the house
在她学会如何好好表现之前
until she learns how to behave.
她不准再回到这个家
The dog?
狗吗
Her, too.
狗也是
Well, Birdie's in her crate.
Birdie在自己的笼子里了
Her cold, dark crate.
又冷又黑的笼子
Mike, she's gonna be fine.
Mike 她不会有事的
She's got a heating pad and a blanket,
她又有电热毯又有毛毯
plus Vince is sleeping next to her on the kitchen floor.
而且Vince就睡在她旁边的厨房♥地板上
I know, it's just gonna be weird to be in this bed all alone.
我知道只是一个人睡在床上很奇怪
I'm right here.
我还在这儿呢
You know what I mean.
你知道我什么意思
Fine, I'll try to snore.
好了我会试着打鼾的
You can scratch my tummy.
你可以挠挠我的小肚子
Try to snore?
你打鼾还用试吗
You know that just because I'm putting her in a crate
我把她放进狗笼里
doesn't mean somehow, you know, I'm gonna be a bad mother.
不代表我就会是一个坏妈妈
Nobody's saying that.
没人这样说
Your mother said exactly that.
这是你妈妈的原话
And she's got some nerve
她那样把你养大
after all the stuff she did to you.
还好意思说我
Hey, she's a good mom.
她可是一位好母亲
Mike.
Mike
It's me.
是我
When you were a baby,
你还是个婴儿的时候
your car seat was a laundry basket.
你的安全座椅是一个洗衣篮
It was safe.
它很安全
She wedged me in with towels.
她在我身旁塞满了毛巾
I rest my case.
我的话说完了
Oh, all right, well, how about your mom?
好啊那你妈妈呢
She's not exactly perfect.
她也不是十全十美啊
I didn't say she was perfect,
我没有说她很完美
but I think she did a pretty darn good job.
但我觉得她做得很好
Molly, come on.
Molly 拜托
It's me.
是我
She soaked your teething rag in whiskey.
她把你的磨牙布泡在威士忌里
And I never felt a single tooth come in,
牙长出来我都没感觉