在下、鄙人和我（2017）

Me, Myself and I S01E11

Part 4 July 29, 2020, 12:03 p.m.

他在用原力
He's using the Force.
是吗牛逼啊
He is? Gnarly.
都住手
Stop this at once!
怎么回事
What's going on here?
莱利历科兹立刻去我办公室
Riley, Ricozzi, my office right now!
-你不明白 -不是你不明白
- You don't understand. - No, you don't understand.
打架的后果就是休学
Fighting comes with an automatic suspension.
但我们不是真的在打
But we weren't really fighting.
-我们是假装的 -你们假装的
- We were fake fighting. - You were fake fighting?
骗子骗子
Fakers! Fakers! Fakers!
先是因为你我女友没了
First, you lost me my girl,
现在名誉也没了
now you lost me my rep.
对不起菲尔我理解你的感受
I'm sorry, Phil. I get how you feel.
我也经历过
I've been there.
以后吃饭你可以
Just know that you can always sit with
跟我和我朋友一起坐我们还可以
me and my buddies at lunch, and we can--
菲尔
Phil!
亚历克斯
Alex?
你在这儿干吗
What are you doing here?
我看了《滑动门》
I watched "Sliding Doors"
电影超棒帕特洛太经典了
It's a heck of a movie, man. Classic Paltrow.
好吧现在我有点怕
Okay. Now, I'm scared.
不要怕一切都很好
Don't be, man. Everything's fine.
我只想让你知道
I just wanted you to let you know
我理解你为什么叫停了婴儿滑板车
that I understand why you buried the Baby Glide.
我8年级伤害了你你25年后报复我
I hurt you in eighth grade, you got me back 25 years later.
合情合理
It's perfectly reasonable.
所以你不生我的气
So you're not upset with me?
不你知道为什么吗
No, and you know why?
-因为我还有山羊[内心很平静] -山羊
- Cause I still have my goat. - Your goat?
你得知道前情
Yeah, it was this thing you had to have heard from earlier--
相信我我没瞎说你知道你和我之间
Trust me, it makes sense, but you know what the difference
有什么不一样吗菲尔
between you and me is, Phil?
我有钱开奥迪和船模约会
I'm rich, I drive an Audi, and I date a boat show model?
不也是而且你依赖别人的想法
No, well, yes, but also, you rely on other people's ideas.
像我这样的人
People like me.
如果你还这样过河拆桥的话就会失败的
If you keep burning bridges, you're gonna fail at this,
就像演戏那样
just like you did at acting.
收回这句话
You take that back!
兄弟你那部电影我看过了
I saw your Lifetime movie, buddy.
你的演技使得泰拉·瑞德
Your acting made Tara Reid
看起来像茱蒂·丹契女爵
look like Dame Judi Dench.
他对拉奇和詹尼弗两个侄女都很好
He was sweetest to his nieces, Laci and Jennifer.
即使他自己没有孩子
And even though he didn't have children of his own--
你会说些好话的对吧
You are going to say something nice, aren't you?
当然
Of course.
更不用提友谊
Not to mention the friendships--
我会以他可能不是凶手来开场
I have a good opener about him probably not being a murderer.
还不错吧
That's nice, right?
现在我想有请
And now, I'd like to invite up
菲尔的一位好友
a very close friend of Phil's,
亚历克斯·莱利来讲几句
Alex Riley, to say a few words.
菲尔曾经他老是
Phil was...well, he was always--
其实菲尔之前一直欺负我
All right, look, the truth is that Phil was a jerk to me.
是真的我不知道还能怎么说
It's true! I don't know what else to say,
他揍了我的脸两次
I mean the guy sucker punched me in the face twice.
谁会这样
Who does that?
我小时候很怕被揍
I mean... When I was a kid, I was afraid of being punched,
但奇怪的是
so I guess in a strange way,
菲尔教会了我如何面对自己的恐惧
Phil did teach me how to face my fears.
还有本来觉得会很糟的事
And also, that something you thought was going to be bad
也可能会比想象中的好
can turn out to be better than you ever imagined.
亚历克斯你没事吧
Alex! You okay?
嗯我没事
Yeah, I'm fine.
别逗了他特别好
Are you kidding? He's great!
脸上挨了菲尔·历科兹一拳
Surviving a Phil Ricozzi punch to the face
让他在学校的声望提升至少27%
raises school cred by at least 27%.
绝对值对吧
Totally worth it, right?
没错
Oh, yeah.
现在想起来他也教会我
Now that I'm thinking about it, he also taught me
动力的来源有时候真是意想不到
that motivation can come from the most unlikely of places.
成功就是最好的复仇
And that success is the best revenge.
都凌晨3点了你怎么还没睡
It's 3:00 a.m. What are you doing up?
我好久没这么有动力了
I'm inspired like I haven't been in years.
我们没拿回婴儿滑板车
We didn't get the Baby Glide back.
嗯但这激发了我的斗志
Yeah, but that's motivated me to come up
让我想到更好的创意了
with even better ideas.
苹果酱傻瓜开罐器
Easy-open applesauce jar.
防绒衣料
A clothing material that repels lint.
可以遛狗的手♥机♥应用
An app for your phone that walks your dog!
遛狗的手♥机♥
A phone walks your dog?
嗯就是有个链子
Yeah, it's got like a leash attachment that you put on--
这些不可能都成功
Look, they can't all be winners.
-嗯 -但记住我的话
- Yeah. - But mark my words,
五年后我们公♥司♥的规模
in five years, we're gonna have a company ten times
-会是菲尔·历科兹的10倍 -没错
- the size of Phil Ricozzi's. - Damn straight.
你猜我们应该干什么
Hey, you know what I think we should do?
别说了
Don't you even say another word.
*我们要发财我们要发财*
*We are gonna be rich We are gonna be rich*
给我钱给我钱
Give me the money, give me the money.
*我们要发财我们要发财*
*We are gonna be rich We are gonna be rich*
*我们要发财*
*We are gonna be rich*
其中一个发明让我事业有成
One of those inventions led to my greatest success,
也让莱利集团享誉全球
which made Riley Industries known the world over.
如果没有菲尔·历科兹
So I guess the truth is that without Phil Ricozzi,
我也不会有此成就
I wouldn't be who I am today.
所以谢谢你菲尔
So thank you, Phil,
提醒我们有些东西是值得我们去奋斗的
for reminding us there are things worth fighting for.
还让我们记住了最重要的事
And for helping us to remember the most important thing:
时间很宝贵
Time is precious.
一刻也不能浪费
And we shouldn't waste a moment of it.
安息吧哥们
Rest in peace, buddy.
偷摸约会
Sneaky date.