在下、鄙人和我（2017）

Me, Myself and I S01E10

Part 4 July 29, 2020, 12:03 p.m.

没事我们刚才在纳闷
Nothing. Uh, we were just talking about
为什么菲尔·历科兹没女朋友
how weird it is that Phil Ricozzi's single.
我觉得迟早
I'll say. It's just a matter of time
会有幸运女孩把他拐跑的
before some lucky girl snatches him up.
你看过他的眼神吗
I'll say. Have you ever looked into his eyes?
穿透力很强但很吸引人
They're so piercing, yet inviting.
-我觉得 -怎么回事
- I'll say. - What's going on?
你们好奇怪
This is weird.
-我做不到 -做不到什么
- I can't do this. - Can't do what?
我们弄坏了新的任天堂
We destroyed our brand new Nintendo,
菲尔说如果我们能让你和他约会
and Phil said that we could have his,
他就把他的给我们
if we get you to go on a date with him.
但不管圣诞节早上
But... I don't care how much trouble we get into
我们有多惨
on Christmas morning.
我也不想忽悠你
I'm not gonna try and trick you.
谢谢你的诚实亚历克斯
I appreciate you being honest, Alex,
我知道那个对你有多重要
and I know how much that game meant to you.
这样吧如果真的可以
Tell you what, if it'll get it back,
我愿意和菲尔看个电影
I'll go to the movies with Phil.
-你愿意帮我 -虽然很烦
- You would do that for me? - It'll be annoying,
但算是圣诞节礼物吧
but consider it a Christmas present.
说不定没那么烦
Maybe it won't be that annoying.
他的头发有薰衣草的香味
His hair does smell like lavender,
-他的牙特别 -不用吹了
- and his teeth are just so-- - You can stop selling.
嗯谢谢
Right, thanks.
跟丽莎合作让我们的关系太紧张了
Working with Lisa is just putting a real strain on our relationship.
她老是让我修改项目
She just keeps noting me to death about the project,
昨晚我有点失控了
and last night, I kinda snapped.
太棒了
That was incredible.
嗯
Yeah.
我有几点建议
I have some notes.
亚历克斯我和你妈是在工作中认识的
You know, Alex, your mother and I met working together.
会有些问题
It can be difficult,
但收获也很多
but also very rewarding.
老规矩罗恩不许说
As always, Ron, I request that you leave any discussion
你和我妈的性史
of sex with my mother out of this.
那我没话说了
Well, that's the end of my story.
别人继续我再想想
Someone else say something, and I'll have some thoughts in a bit.
我感觉很糟
I feel bad, man.
是我逼你找丽莎投资的
Like, I pressured you into this-having-Lisa-invest situation.
不我也同意了好吗
No, man, I agreed, okay?
我依然很喜欢那个发明
I'm still really excited about the invention,
但也很喜欢丽莎
but I'm also really excited about Lisa.
但好像鱼和熊掌不可兼得
It's just, combining them seems like it's jeopardizing both.
看来你要做出选择了
Well, it seems to me that you have a choice to make then,
就像有天我和你妈
like the one your mother and I had to make
深夜在丹佛机场一样
one late night at the Denver airport.
停跑偏了
Oh, stop. This is going in a bad direction.
其他人说吧
Someone else talk.
她想法好多
She just has so many thoughts, you know.
无穷无尽的
It's constant.
"改名字盒子弄成瓷的"
"Change the name. Make the casing ceramic""
天啊盒子应该弄成瓷的
Oh, my God. The casing should be ceramic.
-这就完全不一样了 -我知道
- That changes everything. - Uh, I know.
这是个好主意她真的很聪明
It's a great idea. She's really smart.
但这话是她在做♥爱♥前说的
But she literally said this right as we were about to have sex.
就亚历克斯可以说性奋的事吗
Oh, so Alex is the only one who gets to tell racy stories?
这规矩是怎么定的先生们
I'm confused about the rules here, gentlemen.
我希望发明能成功
Look, obviously I want the invention to work out,
但你能开心对我来说最重要
but the most important thing to me is that you're happy.
你心里是怎么想的
So, what's your gut telling you?
我想在滑道上干
My gut told me to do it right there on the runway.
成熟点吧我们离不开性亚历克斯
Oh, grow up. We're all sexual beings, Alex,
尤其是你妈
especially that mother of yours.
艾比不能交易
Abby, you've gotta kill that trade.
我错了你是对的穆雷特别弱
I was wrong, you were right. Murray's the worst.
爸冷静我们没要他
Dad, calm down. We didn't trade for him.
我跟老板说了这交易不行
I told ownership it was a bad idea,
他们听了我的话因为他们尊重我
and they listened to me, because they respect me.
宝贝抱歉
Sweetheart, I'm sorry.
我也尊重你
I respect you.
你说得对我没好好利用我的时间
And it's true. I haven't been spending my time well.
退休生活比你想象得要难熬啊
Retirement's been harder than you expected, huh?
是啊我原来都是在公♥司♥当老总
Yeah, I mean, I got used to working and being the boss,
别人都尊重我的意见
having my opinion valued.
现在下午却在打电子游戏
I go from that to a guy who spends his afternoons playing video games?
你还在调整期嘛
You're just going through an adjustment period.
嗯我得找个更好的方式来消磨时间
Yeah, well, I gotta find a better way to spend my days.
我有个好主意
Well, I think I have a good idea.
你要雇我当公牛队的教练
Are you gonna hire me to coach the Bulls?
不我是说好主意
No. I said a good idea.
亚历克斯你怎么来了
Alex, what are you doing here?
我们得谈谈
We need to talk.
你不想和我一起工作了
You don't wanna keep working together,
但你还想和我谈恋爱
but you do wanna keep dating.
你怎么知道
How did you know?
因为我也这么想的
Because I feel the exact same way.
亚历克斯你人真的很好
Alex, you're an amazing guy,
我很喜欢和你在一起
and I love to spend time with you,
但和你一起工作真是太烦了
but you are really annoying to work with.
天啊你也是
Oh, my God. You are too.
再见
Bye.
你和渣男的约会如何
So, how was your date from hell?
也没那么糟
It wasn't all that bad.
你笑什么
What are you smiling about?
没什么约会挺有趣的
Nothing. It was fun.
你不用骗我们来让我们好受
You don't have to lie to make us feel better.
别骗我们来让我们好受了
Please stop lying to make us feel better.
我没骗人
I'm not lying.
我没跟菲尔单独相处过
I never spent any alone time with Phil before,
他很逗还挺体贴的
but he was funny and kinda sweet.
先生们交易成交
Gentlemen, a deal's a deal.
享受世界上最强的游戏系统吧
Enjoy the most powerful gaming system the world will ever see.
我能护送美女去英语课吗
Might I escort my lady to English class?
你太逗了
You're so funny.
一点都不逗这又不是笑话
That's not funny. There was literally no joke.
电子游戏很有趣
Video games are fun,
但无法跟现实相提并论
but they are nothing compared to the real world.
逗我吗
Are you kidding me?
他被撞了你看哪呢裁判
He got mugged. What are you looking at, ref?
暂停暂停
Time out. Time out!
过来围过来
Come on. Bring it in. Bring it in.
我最后再问一遍
All right, look, for the last time,
谁防戴支架的女生
who's guarding the girl with the braces?
她得分太多了
She is killing us.
瞧这比虚拟现实好吧
See? Doesn't this beat virtual reality?
对了
Oh, just FYI,
我觉得应该把球传给利瓦伊
I think if you work the ball into Levi,
他比防他的人要高
he's got a bit of a height advantage on his guy.
我没教你怎么工作吧
I don't tell you how to do your job.
好了把球给利瓦伊
All right--all right, work the ball into Levi.
他比防守他的人高
He's got a height advantage on his guy.
好数到三就要赢
All right, win on three!
一二三
One, two, three!
赢
Win!
去吧
Go!
如果不在现实中生活
Because if you don't spend enough time in reality,
就会搞不清事情的重要性
you lose track of what's important.
但说到底关键不在于游戏
But at the end of the day, it's not the game that matters.
而是谁和你玩
It's who you play it with.