崩溃人生（2017）

Crashing S02E05

Part 5 July 15, 2020, 11:42 a.m.

-我我 -带动观众你在说什么
- I-I-- - Getting them going? What are you talking about?
他们超棒可你的声音把他们都盖过了
They were amazing! You can't even hear them, though, over you!
-实在太抱歉了 -天哪
- I'm so sorry. - Oh my God.
-我 -太操蛋了伙计
- I-- - Fucking sucks, man.
真是太操蛋了
That sucks. That sucks.
对不起但我们还要去"小皮鞭"和另一个
Sorry, but, you know, we got Whiplash, we got another one.
-我们能在那录个好带子 -不
- We'll get a good tape from there. - No.
你还有机会我们可以的
You still have a shot. We still-- We can do this.
-皮特 -怎么了
- Pete. - What?
我觉得就这样吧
I think we should call it.
我搞砸了我搞砸了
Okay, I-- I fucked up. I fucked up.
-对啊 -我想弥补
- Yeah. - And I just-- let me make it right.
-我去支摄像机 -我不
- I'll set up the camera. - I don't--
-我去支摄像机我不会 -不用你
- I'll set up the camera. - You're not--
皮特你的态度我心领了
Pete, I appreciate the sentiment.
但这方面我不需要你的帮助
I don't need your help in this pursuit.
我就是想把演出录下来
I just wanna get my tape.
马上要录完了却弄砸了
I was so close, and it's fucked,
太操蛋了
and that sucks,
所以让我做我的事
so just let me go do my thing.
我不那么笑了就正常点像这样
I won't laugh. I'll laugh normal. I'll laugh like...
-皮特 -有趣的傻笑
- Pete-- - These are fun, silly laughs.
我明白你的意思了
I hear what you're-- I hear what you're saying!
我不需要你帮我和马来尼谈
I don't need your help with Mulaney!
带子的事我不需要你帮忙我自己能行
I don't need your help with my tape. I'm great on my own.
-我很好不怪你 -我不该找马来尼的
- I'm so good, and I don't resent you. - I know I fucked up with Mulaney.
我没事
I'm fine!
抱歉女士们先生们
Sorry, ladies and gentlemen,
前方有列车在维修
there's maintenance on the train ahead.
我们要停留一会
We have a delay on the track,
应该很快就可以恢复运行了
and we should be moving again momentarily.
该死
Shit.
不是吧
Seriously?
我明白我现在帮你行不行
I know. Would it be okay to help you right now?
-什么 -上一站是联合广场对不对
- What? - The last stop was Union Square, right?
马上要到第六大道了
This-- this is almost 6th Avenue.
也就是说我们只差几个街区远了
That means we're only a few blocks away.
我们在隧♥道♥里
We're in the middle of a tunnel.
不是我都能看到站台了
We're not. I can see the station from here.
-别管了你走开吧 -听我说
- Just forget it. Please just go away. - Look.
走开
Just go!
你不必喜欢我
You don't have to like me.
我理解就让我帮帮你吧
I get it. I understand. Just let me help you
然后你就再也不用见到我了
and you never have to see me again.
我只想让你能赶上演出
I just wanna get you to your show, okay?
让我让我来弥补
Let me... let me fix this.
-好吧 -好的好的
- Okay. - Yes, yes.
好的跟着我
Okay. Just follow me.
真讨厌真讨厌真讨厌
I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.
-你干什么 -《疾速特攻2》里有这招
- What are you doing? - I saw this in John Wick 2.
天啊
Oh my God.
牛逼
Oh shit.
快跑快跑快跑
Go, go, go, go, go!
好了大伙她很搞笑她到了
All right, folks. She's hilarious, and she's here.
欢迎爱丽·瑞森
Ali Reissen, everybody!
抱歉我迟到了
Sorry I'm late.
天啊我喘不过气了
Oh boy. I'm winded.
大家好
How are you guys?
很好我还有室友
Nice. Nice. I-I have a roommate... still.
没错还有其他人破坏了自己的生活质量吗
Yeah. Anybody else compromising their living situations?
非常好她告诉我她一直以来
Okay, yeah! She told me that she grew up
都相信女人的处♥女♥膜破裂时
believing that women lose their virginity
她们就失去了童贞
whenever their hymen breaks.
我就想"太假了如果是这样
And I'm like, "That's crazy. Like, if that's the case,
我在体操训练营就失去了童贞
I lost my virginity when I was at gymnastics camp,
当时我只有11岁我还和教练上了床"
when I was 11 years old, and I slept with my coach."
我不确定这算不算成功
So I don't know-- was it very successful?
你们喜欢模仿吗
Do you guys like impressions?
太棒了太棒了
It's too good. It's too good!
别
Don't.
-太棒啦 -不不不
- Too good! - No, no, no, no!
今天是洗衣日
It's laundry day.
很多人想打我
A lot of guys will try to fight me,
因为我夺走了他们的工作
'cause I'm stealing their jobs.
有人说"我要把你的菊花撕了"
A guy said, "I'm gonna tear you a new asshole."
然后我说"我是机器人我没有菊花
And I said, "I'm a robot. I don't have an asshole.
所以也许这是好事"
So maybe that would be good."
我认为《变形金刚》系列有种族歧视意味
I think the Transformers franchise is racist.
一堆我的族人羞于承认自己的身份
It's a bunch of my people, ashamed of who they are,
假装自己没有生命
pretending they're inanimate.
他们总说"乔
And they're always like, "Joe...
我们这样做是为了让人类不害怕"
we're just doing that so humans aren't scared."
我就想"你们要是这么想的
And I'm like, "Well, you should've thought of that
当初就不要变成怪物
Before you turned into monsters
然后在打斗中毁掉那些城市
And destroyed all those cities with your fistfights.
因为已经公开了
'Cause the secret's out.
你们不用假装自己是卡车了"
You don't have to be a truck anymore."