奥卡菲娜是来自皇后区的诺拉

我要搬出去
I think-- I think I need to move out.
-那就搬出去吧 -u202d好
- Well, then move out. - u202dYeah.
最后变成埃丝特·王那样就不好了
You don't wanna end up like Esther Wong,
和她89岁的父母睡在同一个房♥间
sleeping in the same room as her 8♥9♥-♥year-old parents.
-天啊 -u202d简直就是中文版
- Jesus. - u202dIt's like a Chinese version
-"威利·旺卡" -没错
- of "Willy Wonka." - u202dRight.
我会搬出去的
You know what? I'm gonna do it.
谢谢 奶奶
Thanks, Grandma.
爸
Hey, Dad?
怎么了 公主
What's up, Princess?
我刚和奶奶谈了
I just talked to Grandma.
我要搬走
I think I'm gonna move out.
好 你住哪里
Okay. Where you gonna live?
我还不知道 但是切妮丝
I don't know yet, but Chenise
刚买♥♥了个大公♥寓♥
just bought this big-ass apartment.
谁
Who?
切妮丝 我高中的朋友
Chenise, my friend from high school.
她是个厉害的律师
She's a badass lawyer.
诺拉 我们为你感到骄傲
Nora, we are so proud of you.
-谢谢 -u202d我很难过
- Thanks. - u202dI'm sad,
但也很开心
but also happy.
我也是
Me too.
-你在干嘛 -对不起
- What are you doing? - Sorry.
我以为要道个别
I just thought we'd have a moment.
这是我们的母语
It's our mother tongue.
-你好啊 -你好啊 宝贝
- What's up? What's up? - What's up? Hi, babe.
-你好吗 -u202d很好 你好吗
- How are ya? - u202dGood, how are you?
-很好 谢谢你让我借住 -不客气
- Good. Thanks for letting me crash. - You're welcome.
给你 随时效劳
Here you go. Any time.
冰箱里的东西随便吃
Look, you can eat whatever you want in the fridge,
但千万别接我的座机
but don't ever pick up my landline.
我正在装♥修♥的第二间卧室
And the second bedroom that I'm renovating,
地板下面有黑色的霉菌
there's actually black mold under the floorboards,
-所以不要进去 -好的
- so like don't go in there. - Oh, yeah.
-我不进去 -好的
- Okay, I won't go in there. - Yeah, okay, cool.
这里怎么了
Yeah, what's up with this place, though?
闻起来像狐臭 还有豆腐水
It smells like, uh, B.O. and tofu water.
很神奇吧
I know, it's amazing, right?
-是啊 -好了
- Yeah, sure. - u202dOh, okay, okay, okay.
科恩来了
That's Corn.
放松 慢点
Easy, easy, slow.
科恩就是他
That's Corn?
他就是你一直想追的人
That's the guy you've been trying to get with?
-是的 -u202d您有乘车请求
- Yeah. - You have a ride request.
-快看 我有乘客了 -u202d好的
- Oh, look at that. I got a customer. - u202dOkay.
-赚钱去咯 -好的
- Make that money! - u202dYeah, okay.
-瓦坎达万岁 -u202d不要这样
- Wakanda. - u202dDon't do that.
我一直很喜欢乡村音乐
I've always been into country.
我爱米兰达·兰伯特
Love Miranda Lambert.
我觉得她超有天赋
Think she's super talented.
名人三人行
Celebrity threesomes.
可能是丹尼·德维托和瑞亚·帕尔曼
Mm, probably Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman.
因为我一直想成为最高的那个
'Cause I've always wanted to be the tall one.
我第二排牙齿后面
I had a full row of teeth
还有一排牙齿
behind a second full row of teeth.
咬块玛撒
Bite into a piece of matzah,
整口牙就会碎
the whole thing would disintegrate, man.
我父母把我扔在了大峡谷
My parents actually left me at the Grand Canyon.
有点像乔·迪特 我爱达娜·卡维
Kinda like Joe Dirt. I love Dana Carvey.
你这是什么 低音管吗
What you got there, a bassoon?
-尤克里里 -对哦
- Um, it's a ukulele. - u202dAh, yes.
犹克里里
An "ook-oo-lele."
美妙的乐器
Beautiful instrument.
我最喜欢的音乐家之一
One of my favorite musicians actually is
以色列·卡马卡威沃尔
Israel Kamakawiwo'ole.
他死了 但他的音乐还活着 身材太好了
He's dead, but his music lives on. Beautiful body.
对不起 你能看路吗
Sorry, can you watch the road, please?
好的 没问题
Yeah, yeah, you got it. You got it.
我高中时也涉猎过音乐
Yeah, I-- I too used to dabble in music back in high school.
但是那里应该叫双性学校
But they should've called it bi-school
因为那时我还是双性
'cause I was bi as fuck back then.
双性恋 阴♥道♥和阴♥茎♥
Bisexual. Um, vagina and penis.
抱歉 你能快点吗
Sorry, do you mind going a little faster?
我的演出要迟到了
It's just I'm gonna be late for this gig.
酷 真有演出啊
Oh, cool, real gig, huh?
真正的演出
Real gig, wow.
其实是开放麦
Well, it's an open mic.
但很多人就是这样被发掘的
But that's how a lot of people get discovered.
我打赌他们就是这样发掘以色列·卡马卡威沃尔的
I bet that's how they found Israel Kamakawiwo'ole.
我看看还有没有他的光盘
Matter of fact, let me see if I still got his CD.
请靠边 你吓到我了 我要下车
Please pull over! You're scaring me and I'd like to get out!
你要下车 为什么
You wanna get out? Why?
立刻停车 否则我就报♥警♥了
Pull over now or I'm calling the cops.
立刻靠边
All right, pulling over now.
你这司机太烂了
You should know you're a bad driver.
我们不是应该互相鼓励吗
Shouldn't we uplift each other?
一星
One star.
过得愉快
Have a good one.
天哪 天哪
Oh, holy shit! Oh, my God!
快车居然让我暂停拉客
Can you believe that Commutez suspended me
就因为我弄断了一个白人女孩的锁骨
because I broke one white girl's collarbone?
同时我的评分降到了2.0
Meanwhile my rating drops down to a 2.0,
作为平均绩点来说很棒
which is a dope GPA,
但是作为快车评分就很垃圾了
but a shit Commutez rating.
我们得给你找份工作
Oh, yeah, listen, we need to find you a job.
好吧 好吧
All right, all right, all right.
有什么想法吗
All right, any ideas?
建筑
Architecture.
贱筑
Mm, "artiteture."
问题是我讨厌楼房♥
Um, the thing with that is I hate buildings
讨厌建筑
and I hate the act of building.
而且不是需要学位吗
Plus, don't you need a degree for that?
好吧 教育程度较低的工作
Okay, okay, okay. Something with less education.
我堂弟在扬克斯的疗养院工作
Okay, my cousin works at a convalescent home in Yonkers.
要我看看他们招人吗
Do you want me to see if they need an extra hand?
不 我不能再干那个了
Yeah, nah, I can't do that again.
老人害怕我 我会让他们想起越南人
I-- I freak out old people. I remind them of 'Nam.
还有什么 还有什么 还有什么
Okay, what else? What else? What else?
我什么也做不了 切妮丝
I can't do anything, Chenise?
-好吧 -u202d我会孤独终老
- Okay. - u202dI am gonna die alone
和我爷爷奶奶睡在一起
sleeping with my grandparents,
就像《欢乐糖果屋》里一样
like "Willy Wonka and the Charlie Factory."
没事的 乖
Okay, that's nothing. Okay, shh, shh...
我也想像你一样有目标 你这个蠢婊♥子♥
I wish I had purpose like you, you dumb bitch.
你是个有钱的律师
You're a rich-ass lawyer
看起来还像奥利维亚·波普
and you look like Olivia Pope.
我什么都没有
I got nothing.
好吧
Okay, okay.
谢谢
Thank you.
没事的
It's gonna be okay.
别再把我的头发点着了
Don't light my hair on fire again.
不会的
I won't.
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这下好了
Great.
切妮丝
Chenise?
切妮丝 u202d
Chenise! u202d
切妮丝 工作电♥话♥
Chenise, your work is calling!
切妮丝
u202dChenise?
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我正在装♥修♥的第二间卧室