三代同层（2017）

9JKL S01E10

Part 1 April 30, 2021, 12:49 p.m.

三代同层
披萨店
畅爽冰饮
片片披萨
直译
美国说唱歌♥手
原名钱斯勒·乔纳森·班尼特
位于美国加利福尼亚
美国著名男演员及导演
孩子们我们有一个好消息
Boys, we have very exciting news.
我们给我们四个人
We bought burial plots.
都买♥♥了墓地
For all of us.
墓地吗
Burial plots?
我不想去考虑这种事情太令人伤心了
I don't want to think about this. It's too sad.
但更伤心的是如果没有提前计划好
But what's even sadder is not having planned ahead
就会像穆瑞叔叔那样不得不下葬于
and having to go to the bad part of the cemetery
地段不好的墓地
like poor Uncle Murray.
他的墓地离停车场太远了
His plot was so far away from the parking lot,
即使我们曾经很喜欢他
even if we had liked him,
但也懒得去探望他了
we didn't want to visit.
然后呢你们去见了遗产策划师吗
So, what, you met with an estate planner?
没有我看到了一个弹窗广♥告♥
No, no. I got a pop-up advertisement
并争取到了一个很优♥惠♥的价格
and got a great deal on the plots.
它就那样弹了出来
It just popped up.
对啊我也看到了
Yeah, I saw it happen.
原本没有的可它突然就弹出来了
It wasn't there, and then, pop, it was.
现在我们在一棵橡树底下
And we now have
有四块很漂亮的墓地
four gorgeous plots under a big oak tree.
四块吗那伊芙的那块呢
Four plots? What about Eve?
额...
Wha...
还有我未来老婆的
And what about my future wife
那块墓地呢
who I hope to meet someday?
乔希你试过结婚
Josh, you tried marriage.
但最后还是不能白头偕老
It didn't work.
还是和妈妈葬在一起吧
Just be buried with your mother.
不了谢谢我不会那样做的
No, thank you. Not doing it.
别这样你们可以永远相依相偎
Come on, you guys could spoon for all eternity.
好吧你知道吗
Okay, you know what?
我本来在这里然后我突然就消失啦
I was here, and then, pop, I wasn't.
我猜他是在暗示伊芙要加入墓地计划了
I guess that means Eve is in.
哈利积极一点嘛
Well, Harry, try to be positive.
乔希可能还会孤独终老
Josh may still wind up alone
然后加入我们这个计划
and want to join us.
好的快点好起来兄弟
Okay. Feel better, buddy.
对不起妹妹我不能和你去演唱会了
I'm so sorry, sis; I can't go to the concert with you now.
- 为什么 - 因为厄内斯特
- Why not? - 'Cause Ernesto
得了口腔皮疹
has a mouth rash,
真的让我感到恶心
which is extra nasty
因为我们用同一个口哨
because we share a whistle.
要不你给我演唱会门票
So, how about you just give me the tickets to the concert,
然后我和其他人去
and I'll go with someone else?
- 和谁去 - 不要担心不是男的
- Like who? - Don't worry, not a guy.
我想和黛比去
I'll call Debbie.
胖黛比还是瘦黛比
Fat Debbie or Skinny Debbie?
胖黛比
Fat Debbie.
替我问候她
Tell her I said "What up."
- 好的等一下见 - 好的
- All right, I'll see you in a minute. - Okay.
哇有人走桃花运了噢
Well. Look at my man getting some sweet action.
不是不是你看看那是...
No, no. See, that's ...
不要否认了
Don't "No, no" Me.
我和一个女孩这样做的时候你就调侃我
You dish it out when I'm with a girl.
你在"掠夺"她时
So, did you feel like a pirate
有觉得自己像个海盗吗
when you plundered that booty?
那是我妹妹
That was my sister.
我不知道那是你妹妹
I did not know that was your sister.
否则我就不会这样说她
If I had, I wouldn't have mentioned her booty,
当然你也不会"掠夺"她
and certainly not your plundering of it.
- 好 - 对不起
- Yeah. - So sorry.
黛比没空去演唱会
Well, Debbie can't go to the concert.
幸好
Just as well.
演唱会的舞台位置非常窄
The seats at the arena are pretty narrow.
乔希这是我的妹妹托妮
Josh, this is my sister, Toni.
托妮这是乔希他住在这里
Toni, this is Josh. He lives in the building.
和他的父母共住噢
With his parents.
是住隔壁啦你好
Next to my parents. Hi.
- 你好 - 我原本打算带托妮
- Hi. - I was supposed to take Toni
去看"机会·说唱歌♥手"的演唱会
to see Chance The Rapper, but,
但是我要帮厄内斯特替班
I got to stay and cover for Ernesto.
恐怕你错过了
So I guess you missed your chance
去看说唱歌♥手的机会了
to see the rapper.
- 少在那玩文字游戏乔希 - 好吧
- Lame wordplay's not gonna help, Josh. - Well...
不过... 你能不能
But, would you step
- 来办公室一下下吗 - 没问题
- into the office really quick? - Sure.
你是...
Okay. Hey, so, you're...
你是一个正直的小伙子
you're an upstanding guy.
对吗你觉得
Right? Do you think
你可以带托妮去演唱会吗
that maybe you could take Toni to the concert?
实际上我今天晚上也没有什么安排
Well, actually, I don't have plans tonight.
- 真令人震惊 - 听着
- Shocking. - Look.
你带她去就算帮我大忙了我信任的熟人
You'd really be helping me out. I'd feel a lot better if I knew
陪她去我会放心很多
someone I trusted is with her.
没问题我很乐意带她去
Yeah, sure. I'd be happy to take her.
托妮
Tone.
你哥哥找了一个人
Your big brother just got you
陪你去演唱会
a plus-one for the show.
我是你哥哥找的那个人
And I will be that plus-one.
你父母给我们买♥♥墓地吗
Your parents bought us burial plots?
是的我知道你会说什么不过不要担心
Yes. And I know what you're gonna say, but don't worry.
我会用紧挨着妈妈的那块墓地
I'll take the one next to my mother.
就当这是我送你的一份礼物吧
Consider it my parting gift to you.
他们这种善意让我有点毛骨悚然
That's very nice in a morbid kind of way,
我会选择火葬
but I'm getting cremated.
火葬吗
Cremated?
- 是的我告诉过你 - 不你没有
- Yeah. Told you that. - No, you haven't.
有啊这是我一直想要做的事
Yes, I have. It's something that I've always wanted.
其他的小朋友想在海里玩
Other kids wanted to play in the ocean,
我希望把我的骨灰撒到海里
I wanted to have my ashes spread in it.
这样你可以被观光船冲散
So you can be run over by a cruise ship
或者被摩托艇吸进去吗
or sucked into a Jet Ski?
我觉得大海非常的自♥由♥和平静
The ocean is just so free and peaceful.
如果怀特把我撒在马利布
Maybe if Wyatt dumps me in Malibu,
也许詹姆斯·弗兰克会在里面游泳
James Franco will swim in me.
我们应该土葬这样就能有个地方
We should be buried. That way there's a place
让我们的儿子和其他崇拜者去哀悼我们
for our son and various other admirers to mourn us.
他们一定会悲痛欲绝
And they're going to mourn hard.
安德鲁你知道我有幽闭恐惧症
Andrew, you know I'm claustrophobic.
只要想到周围有泥土和虫子
I can't stand the thought of being close
我就受不了还有...
to all that dirt and bugs and...
你妈
your mother.
别管她了我们可以葬在别的地方
Forget about her. We can be buried anywhere.
重要的是我们会永远在一起
The point is we're together forever.
宝贝好感人
Babe, that's so sweet.
但是也许我们可以按照婚礼誓词来
But maybe we go with what the guy at our wedding said.
记得吗 "直到死亡将你们分开"
Remember? "Till death do you part."
我认为那是个问句
I took that as a question.
"你们会分开吗" 不不会的
"Do you part?" No, you don't.
那你跟我一起火化呗
So get cremated with me.
可我连加热灯下都不想待啊
I don't even like to be under a heat lamp.
看来尼克一定非常信任你
Well, Nick must really trust you.
他竟然全程没有给我发短♥信♥
He didn't text me once during the show.
他以前都会发吗
He usually does?
对如果我今晚是和黛比去的话
Yeah. Like, if I had gone with Debbie tonight,
他肯定会说 "别喝太多酒"
he would have been all like, "Don't drink too much."
"别和任何男人说话
"Don't talk to any guys.