工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S01E09
Part 3
June 28, 2021, 1:25 p.m.
才能干其它事啊
before we can continue anything.
不是有个宇♥宙♥真♥理♥吗
I think everybody knows that it's an unwritten rule:
真的勇士也不能在勃起时交战
Warriors cannot collide while erect.
哼 - 那好吧
Fine. - Fine.
先休息会 - 赶紧打飞机
Take five. - Crank down.
上手打出来
Crank it down.
这后院确实不错
I mean, it's a great backyard.
是啊 简直不能再棒
Yeah, it's pretty nice.
我在想 那边要不要放个锦鲤池
Thinking about putting a koi pond over there.
反正有地方 – 再放个瀑布
You got the room for it. - Waterfall.
那也不错 - 当然
Might as well. - Yeah.
老二软了 开战
And the boner's down! Fight!
来吧
Ohh! Come on!
上啊
Yeah, baby!
来啊 等什么呢
Yeah, baby, what?
锁喉了 锁喉了
Choker. Choker.
分开 分开 分开
Break up! Break it up! Break it up!
干嘛啊 - 怎么啦
What? - What?
你们两个都一柱擎天了好吧
You guys both have boners now.
什么情况啊 - 哇
What is going on? - Wow!
这还传染呢
It's contagious, dude!
你太赤果果了 穿个上衣好不好
You're too fleshy. Put on a shirt.
这哥们闻起来太香了
This guy smells great.
跟椰子油似的 你抹了什么啊
It's like a coconut oil. What is that?
谢啦 这是我美黑霜的味道
Thank you. It's my tanning cream.
哦 都软下去了
Oh! Boners are down.
我要灭了你
I'm gonna ruin you, man.
我要完成来这儿的使命
I'm gonna straight do what I came here to do.
老子要弄死你
I'm gonna straight wreck you!
你会惨死在我的脚下 你个心胸狭隘的
You're gonna die at my feet, you small-minded--
完了 小兄弟又起立了 - 我的也是
okay, I've got a boner. - I've got one too.
我刚说"脚"的时候 感觉就像
Soon as I said "My feet," It was like...
恩 就好像全身血液都
Yeah, all the blood just sort of--
我也这样 这也太诡异了
that happened to me too. That's what's weird about it.
没事儿啦 - 还是很诡异啊
That's cool. - This is really weird.
我觉得吧 咱们现在估计打不起来了
You know what? We're not gonna fight right now.
确定一定以及肯定
That's official.
我起"性"趣了 你也"性"致盎然
I'm torqued. You're torqued right now.
不过你们离开总可以吧
But I know you can leave.
离开我家 别动我的女人
You can leave my house and respect my woman.
这样总可以吧 - 好啊
That's what you can do. - Fine.
离开 - 巴不得呢
Leave. - Gladly.
不过 我还有件事情要宣布
Well, I have a little announcement for you, sir,
因为你违背了我们的歃血结盟
because you broke the blood oath,
你被我们巫师团队踢了
and I want you to leave our wizard crew.
哦 是吗 好像我在乎似的
What? Yeah. Like I care.
这伴奏盘我也要拿回来
And I'm taking the beats back.
啊 别把光盘拿走 - 不可能
Ah, don't take the beats. - Yeah.
别 别拿走
No, don't take the beats.
我不能没有它
Ohh! Don't take the beats!
我会肝肠寸断的
I'm super-sad about the beats!
哥们 我不在乎 我还要参加健美比赛
I don't care, dude, because I have a bodybuilding competition
就在同一天
on the same day.
对我而言这可比
And that's more important to me
穿成娘炮巫师要重要
than dressing up like a fairy wizard.
靠 - 其实吧 哥们
Wow. - You know what, man?
咱们没必要这样
It did not have to go like this.
我们这就走
We're out of here.
你特么就是个傻缺
You're such a dumb idiot!
好吧 爷不在乎
Wow, okay. I don't care.
我希望这赶紧软下去
I hope this goes away soon.
你传染给我的一柱擎天
You infected me with your boner.
我们一样可以过得很好
We are going to be just fine.
我们不需要Adam
Okay? We do not need Adam.
对啊 就咱俩挺好
Oh, no. We're great.
非常好
We're awesome, heh.
就我们两个人 最佳室友
Just the two of us. Best roommates ever.
生活照旧
Nothin's gonna change.
没有
Nope.
一切都照旧
Nothing is going to change!
没啥变化的 兄弟
It's not changing, buddy.
我知道 你做后座我当司机 好吧
I know, I got that. You're in the back. Okay.
Blake 拿啤酒来
Blake! Beer me, dude!
一个给大个子Ders 一个给小矮子Adam
One for big Ders, and one for little Adam.
等会
Wait...
*你是怎样的一个朋友*
Ooh, what a friend I have in you?
*我希望你跟我的想法一样*
I hope you see the same as I do
哦 老子牛逼
Ohh! Suck it!
*你是我最好的朋友*
A good best friend in you
两个男人在按♥摩♥池里
Just two dudes in a jacuzzi.
嗯 是啊
Yeah.
这样不行啊
This is not working.
对 根本行不通
No, this is not working at all.
我们需要个新室友
We gotta get a new roommate.
嗨
Hey!
Karl - 你好啊 亲爱的
Karl! - How's it going, baby?
你好啊 谢谢你们让我住这儿
How you doin'? Thanks for having me over, guys.
我已经准备好 呃 重返人类社会
I'm ready to, uh, to join human society one more time.
瞧我的沙发怎么样
Call this couch.
居然有个三明治
Surprise sandwich!
Blake 这事儿我可没同意啊
Blake, I never agreed to this.
哥们 我超饿
Oh, you guys, I'm so starving.
巨饿 非常饿
I'm so starving. I'm so starving.
嘿 我的左臂 你怎么样了
Hey, left arm, how ya doin'?
你结实了不少啊
Oh, you're gettin' so much stronger.
我的右臂啊 你看起来可要差一点儿咯
Right arm, you're kind of looking weak over there, buddy.
去我办公室 给你五分钟
My office, five minutes.
刷好牙 剪好指甲
Brush your teeth, cut your fingernails,
别忘了给你的蛋蛋上上粉
and powder your balls.
我还可以剔好牙
I might even floss for you.
怎么了
Whaaat?
哦 太棒 可以了
Ohh! Yeah, that's it.
结束了 谢谢你
We're done. Thank you.
哇 这感觉真 真是累人啊
Wow, that was-- that was exhausting.
我下巴可疼了
My jaw hurts pretty bad.
不过还是 呃 挺有意思的
It was-- ah, that was fun, though.
这感觉可 真亲密
That was, like, intimate.
你就正对着我的脸
You were right up in here, so...
等等 你想把这东西放哪儿 带着
Hey, where's that going? Where's that--keep--
我把它摘了 实在太疼了
I'm taking it off. It's like it hurts pretty--
没事儿 长茧子就好了
yeah, that's okay. You'll form a callus.
肯定会长的 带着吧 坚强点儿
It's supposed to happen. Keep it on. Be tough.
好吧
Okay.
下次我们用那根儿吧
Hey, maybe next time we can use the strap-on
就老天爷给我的那根儿
that God gave me, my--
免谈 不可能
Pass. Pass. No
我的那根儿
My...
我觉得应该再往上来一点
Just gonna get 'em taken up a little bit.
你很用心 但是
I appreciate all your hard...
兄弟们 看看我的新巫师服
Hey, guys, check out my new wizard costume.
怎么样 - Karl
What's up? - Karl...
我们又不是演野人 你这是想干啥
We're not barbarians. What are you doing?
你穿的像个傻缺萨满好吗
You're dressed like some kind of God damn farm shaman.
不是啊 我要演大祭司
No, I'm a high priest.
我赢了
Whoo! And I won!
连比赛都用不着
Yeah, baby, I wasn't even racin' anyone,
即便要比 爷也一定会赢
but I would have won if I were.
你现在是非法入侵 你知道吗
I'd just like you to know that you are trespassing. All right?
现在 我们会把你当做入侵者
And we are gonna just assume that you are an intruder at this point.
好吧 对不起
Okay, I'm sorry,
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
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