威尔和格蕾丝

Will & Grace S09E12

Part 2 Jan. 12, 2020, 7:57 p.m.

我在大学时和他睡过厉害吧
I slept with him in college. Impressed?
拜托我在大学和超多教授搞过
Please, I fooled around with so many professors in college
他们高♥潮♥时叫的声音都巨大
and they all magna came loudly.
我爱这节目
I love this show,
但我好纠结他们到底会不会在一起
but the will-they-won't-they is killing me.
亲爱的我已经把温度调到最高了
Honey, I've turned the heat up as high as it'll go,
可还是没上演色情片呢
but there's still no gay porn.
因为好的基佬色情片需要合适的音乐
That's 'cause a good gay porno needs the right kinda music.
我在学术期刊里看到的
Or so I've read in academic journals.
要开始了要开始了
It's happening. It's happening!
-差一点 -该死
- So close! - Devil!
好吧被音乐搞砸了怪我
Okay, we blew it with the music, that's on me.
够了我要切换到我的豪车镜头
That's it. I'm switching over to my limo.
上一次查看司机的时候他翻进了阴沟里
When we last left Driver, he was upside down in a ditch.
不不不我
No, no, no, no, no. I'm--
我完全沉迷于这个爱情故事
I'm too invested in the love story.
我也是
Well, so am I.
天自从弗莱泽和奈尔斯之后
Gosh, I haven't rooted this hard for a gay couple
我就再没这么支持过电视上的同性情侣了
to get together on TV since Frasier and Niles.
美剧《欢乐一家亲》人物
他们是兄弟
They were brothers.
我知道
I know.
你觉得他们在说什么
What do you think they're saying?
是什么阻止他们走到一起
What's keeping these two guys apart?
要是我们能破译他们的密语就好了
If only we could break their secret code!
再说一次这是西班牙语
Yeah. Again, Spanish.
好呀美女
Hi, sexy.
是那个通信公♥司♥的人
It's the Verizon Guy!
你好尼尔我能静音你一会儿吗
Hi, Neil. Can I-- can I mute you a sec?
我不断推脱和他的第二次约会已经好多年了
Ugh, rescheduling a second date with this guy for years.
每次我以为我摆脱他了
Every time I think I'm rid of him,
他就像赫拉尔多·瑞弗拉一样冒出来
he pops back up like Geraldo Rivera.
嘿尼尔
Hey, Neil.
今晚有约哦猛♥男♥
Tonight's on the books, stud.
"周五晚威尔与尼有「约」
"Friday night, Will gets Neiled.
茄子茄子笑脸
Eggplant, eggplant, smiley face."
笑脸会是你的
The smiley face will be yours.
恐怕我又得取消了
Uh, I--I'm afraid I'm gonna have to cancel again.
不不妈妈
No! No, Mama.
-妈妈们真烦人 -他懂仆人的密语
- Moms, right? - He knows the servants' secret code!
没错他妈妈是阿根廷人
That's right, his mom's from Argentina.
这是他唯一有趣的地方
It's the one interesting thing about him.
所以小情郎今晚怎么说
So lover, about tonight?
我...觉得今晚没问题
I...think tonight will work.
你能来我办公室这边吗
Can you pop by the office?
所以你想玩"秘书诱惑"对吧
So you wanna play secretary, huh?
-给老板做会议"鸡录"... -好了再见
- Take a little dick-tation from Mr... - Okay, bye.
-快去钓汉子啊 -不杰克我们还是回去吧
- Go flirt with someone! - No, Jack. Let's just go home.
女人是不一样的
Women are different.
我们无法随便找个人然后说"我们做♥爱♥吧"
We can't just go up to any rando and say, "Let's have sex."
相信我我很清楚异性恋女人
Trust me, I'm well aware of the subtle and delicate
小心翼翼慢慢试探的交♥配♥仪式
mating rituals of the heterosessual woman.
是她干的她喜欢你
She did that. She likes you.
我不喜欢你
I don't like you.
我是说我不知道我是否喜欢你
I mean, I--I don't know if I like you
因为我不了解你
because I don't know you.
那真是我的损失了
Well, it's my loss.
因为你是今天来这里的最漂亮的女人
Because you're the most beautiful woman who's come in here all day.
只是今天而已吗
Just today?
鱼终于变成鸟了
Ahh, the fish has become the bird.
不老妈我没办法接电♥话♥
No, mother, I couldn't answer the phone
因为我当时在帮格蕾丝钓一个侍应生
because I was helping Grace hook up with a waiter.
杰克
Jack!
跟她说那是个性感的侍应生
Tell her it was a hot waiter.
并且是在女厕所做的
And in the ladies' room.
这下觉得我厉害了吧
Aren't you impressed now?
我有次在自♥由♥女神像下的女厕所里做过爱
I once had sex in the ladies' room in the Statue of Liberty.
那是我唯一「进入」过的女人
Only woman I've ever been inside of.
不你得听我说
No, you're gonna let me speak.
不你得听我说妈
No, you're gonna let me speak, Mother!
詹姆斯杰克
James--Jack--
我现在无法面对这一出
I can't with this right now.
因为他是我男朋友德鲁
Because he's my boyfriend, Drew.
接受现实吧不你不能挂我电♥话♥
Deal with it, okay-no, you do not hang up on me.
别...朱迪丝
Do not--Judith!
那花是送给我的吗
Are those for me?
格蕾丝我是个白♥痴♥ 我慌乱了
Grace, I'm an idiot. I panicked.
我刚离婚你又跟我住同一栋楼
I'm just out of a divorce and you live in the building
那些都毫无意义
and none of that means anything
因为现在外面的月亮美得令人窒息
because there is a crazy, beautiful moon out right now
我只想跟你一起赏月
and there is no one that I would rather look at it with.
我愿意跟你一起赏月
I'd look at the moon with you.
你让这事一下变得好简单
Wow, you made that so easy.
因为这是我的问题所在
I mean, this is my problem.
我总是很担心事情会变得复杂
I--I get so worried about things getting complicated.
没有这事没有任何复杂的地方
It's not. There is nothing complicated about this at all.
爸
Dad?
杰杰
J.J.
你好
Hi.
我只是来拿尼克斯队的比赛票
I was just coming up to grab those Knicks tickets,
-但你竟然在这里 -我们都在这里
- but here you are. - Here we all are.
所以这就是你提到的跟你
So this is the woman in the building
-住同一栋楼的那个女人 -没错
- that you've been talking about. - Yep.
你可别乱打主意小子
And don't you get any ideas, bub.
那简直太疯狂了
Oh, that's crazy!
好了詹姆斯不如这样
Okay, okay, James, you know what?
你先进去
Um, why don't you go in there and, um,
把那瓶贵重的红酒打开
open that beautiful bottle of pinot.
我会「拷吻」你儿子...
Um, I'm going to drill your son--
拷问你儿子...
grill your son--
拷问你儿子了解更多关于你的事
Grill your son about-about you.
好吧但别泄露太多信息哦
Okay, all right. But don't give too much away.
他最好别「露」太多
He better not!
好吧今天跟你玩得很开心但我们就当没发生过吧
Okay, today was fun, but let's just agree it never happened.
不行我想继续见你
No. I wanna see you again.
-不绝对不行 -跟我喝杯咖啡吧
- No! No, no. - oh, just have coffee with me.
不行我在跟你♥爸♥恋爱呢
No, I am--I am seeing your father.
我要跟他对决争取你爸
I'll fight him for you. Dad!
什么嘘
What?! Shh!
好吧好吧行
Okay, okay, okay.
我答应跟你喝咖啡
We'll have-we'll have coffee.
再吃块饼干
And--and maybe a biscotti.
好吧两块饼干因为我喜欢用一块蘸咖啡
Okay, two biscottis, 'cause I like to dip one
再吃另一块
And then eat the other one and--
但你请你现在赶快走吗
Okay, but can you-can you please, please just--just go, just go.
杰杰你有空一起喝红酒吗
J.J., do you have time for wine?
他没空
He doesn't.
-不我有时间 -什么
- No, I have time. - What?
快告诉我吗他们在说些什么
Talk to us. What--what are they saying?
某人很急切嘛
Mm, someone's an eager beaver.
对此我只想说天了噜
To which I say...damn.
赶快翻译吧西语台
Just translate, Univision.
有新进展了
Ooh, new development:
那位糕点师刚刚邀请那位大厨
the pastry chef just asked the cook
周末一起去大西洋城
to Atlantic City for the weekend.
太棒了他是怎么回复的
Yes! Yes! And--and what'd he say?
他说他去不了他有事
He says he can't. He's got a thing.
我就知道我就知道
Ah! I knew it! I knew it!
大厨在拿他当备胎
You see, Cook is stringing him along
他虽然喜欢他却又觉得自己能找到更好的
'cause he likes him, but he thinks he can do better.
你完全猜对了亲爱的