威尔和格蕾丝
Will & Grace
第九季
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威尔和格蕾丝
Will & Grace S09E10
Part 2
Jan. 12, 2020, 7:57 p.m.
乐意至极 文斯的大喜日子 好棒哦 文斯
Happy to go. Vince's big day. Yay, Vince!
我以为我会同情自己
You know, I thought I would feel sorry for me,
但其实我同情文斯
but, I mean, actually, I feel sorry for Vince.
他要娶的这个人超级没劲
This guy he's marrying is a real snooze.
我一早上都在看他的社交媒体
I was looking at his social media all morning.
首先 他喜欢转发
I mean, first of all, he's a retweeter.
脑子里没有一点原创的东西
So not an original thought in his head.
在照片分享网上 他发的全是吃的
And on Instagram, he's a food poster.
不仅是正餐 还有小吃
And not just, like, meals. I mean, like, snacks.
-什么玩意儿... -好吧
- What, wha... - Okay.
我知道肯定有什么不对劲
I know that something's wrong,
因为你眉毛修过头了
because you're over-plucking your eyebrows.
你就像是《女子监狱》里的群众演员
You look like an extra on "Orange Is the New Black."
那你呢 卷毛苏[《最Q拍档》]
What about you, Curly Sue?
谢谢
Oh, thank you.
我很惊讶文斯克服了他的承诺恐惧症
Look, am I surprised that Vince got over his commitment-phobia
和一个他认识才9个月的人结婚吗
with a guy he's known for nine months?
当然 我是在回顾
Sure. And am I replaying
我们恋爱的最后几周
the last weeks of our relationship
寻找我可能漏掉的线索吗
for clues that I might have missed?
是的 这会让我想知道
Yes. And does it make me wonder
我们分手的真正原因吗
the real reason for our breakup
如果不是因为他害怕做出承诺的话
if it wasn't his fear of commitment?
当然
Well, of course!
我不是刚倒了杯咖啡放这儿了吗
Didn't I just have a coffee here?
在碗柜里 "基佬花♥园♥"
It's in the cupboard, Gay Gardens.
典出电影《灰色花♥园♥》
影片中一对母女被社会遗忘
我刚在说什么来着
What was I saying?
你刚正在撒一个很长的谎
You were telling a long lie
说你对文斯结婚这事毫不在意
about how fine you are with Vince's wedding.
我明白你想知道你们当年分手的真正原因
Look, I know that you want to know the real reason for the breakup,
但无论是什么 都会伤害你
but there's no answer that's not gonna hurt you.
当然不是这样
Well, that's just not true.
好吧 如果他回答说
Okay, all right, what if he says
是因为他觉得你不好看了
that it's because he no longer found you attractive
或无趣了 或和你相处不愉快了呢
or interesting or fun to be around?
他为什么会说这种话 他跟你说了吗
Why would he say that? Did he say that to you?
天呐 我努力健身 保持体型
God, you know, I work so hard to stay in shape.
我从不吃自己想吃的食物
I never eat anything that I want.
我看书 我有好玩的趣闻
You know, I read. I have good anecdotes.
我还特别幽默 比如
And I am fun. Like, for instance,
我每次见到狗狗 都会说
whenever I see a dog, I'll say,
"先生您好 请问您尊姓大名"
"Hello, sir, what's your name?"
求你别去参加婚礼
Please don't go to this wedding.
你说得对 我讨厌你是对的的时候
You're right. I hate that you're right.
我知道 但相信我
I know you do, but trust me.
我会帮你打掩护 我已经想好绝佳的借口了
I'll cover for you. I already have the perfect excuse.
别瞎编说我呕吐或拉肚子就行了
Just don't make it, like, vomiting or diarrhea.
我会想出绝佳的借口
I'll think of the perfect excuse.
天呐 瞧这场面
Oh, my God, look at this.
要是早知道现场会有这么多帅哥
If I had known there would be so many hot guys here,
我就把膝盖以上的毛也刮一下了
I would have shaved from the knees up.
或是下巴以下的
Or the chin down.
他们都穿着制♥服♥ 我的基佬雷达不太灵了
All these uniforms are throwing off my 'dar.
比如说 那男的保持那种站姿
Like, is that guy standing like that
是因为警棍碍事吗
because of his nightstick?
或是裤裆里的"茎棍"
Or his night stick?
稍后见分晓
Stay tuned.
嗨 杰拉德 叫你老婆听电♥话♥
Hi, Jared, put your wife on the phone.
你好呀 伊万卡
Oh, hi, Vanky.
听着 我就想告诉你一声
Listen, I want just you to know that
今年的寻宝游戏冠军非我莫属
I'm gonna win that scavenger hunt this year.
我是指光明正大地赢 不找俄♥国♥人帮忙
And I mean actually win it, without help from the Russians.
影射川普能当选
与俄♥国♥的帮助有关
放松你的括约肌 杰拉德
Oh, loosen your sphincter, Jared.
我不知道你还在线上
I didn't know you were still on the line.
替我向孩子们问好
Love to the kids!
威尔没来参加婚礼 我真是松了一口气
Ugh, I am so glad Will didn't come to the wedding.
看到文斯这么幸福 会要了他的命
It would have killed him to see Vince so happy.
莱恩看上去是个很好的人
Ryan seems like a really great guy.
真的吗 我可没看出来
Really? I do not see that.
问个小问题 各位
Quick question, fellas.
你们最喜欢的电视剧是哪一部
What's your favorite TV show of all time?
-《火线》 -《火线》
- "The Wire." - "The Wire."
经典犯罪类美剧
《火线》
"The Wire."
《我们的生活》
"This Is Us."
温馨家庭剧
-你好 我叫杰克 -你好
- Hi, I'm Jack. - Hi.
我叫你别来了
I told you not to come.
我们还要为这种事吵多少次
How many times do we have to have the fight
我每次都是对的
where we realize I'm always right
但你总是要过后才明白我是对的
before you realize I'm always right?
我们在一起五年
We were together for five years.
我不来的话 他会伤心的
I think he'd be hurt if I didn't show up.
少来了 你是来逼他说出
Oh, please, you're here to hock him for answers
-跟你分手的原因 -我才不是来逼问的
- about your breakup. - I'm not here to hock!
我从来不逼问别人 我不是"逼"人的人
I would never hock. I'm not a hocker.
我需要一个了结 格蕾丝
Look, I just... I need closure, Grace.
我得搞清楚他当年为什么和我分手
I need to find out why he broke up with me.
-没这必要 -不过占用他两分钟
- You don't. - It's two minutes of his time.
两分钟能出什么幺蛾子
What could possibly go wrong in two minutes?
问问那些在毕业舞会上被搞大肚子的女孩去
Ask every girl who ever got pregnant at her prom.
-婚礼很棒 -是啊
- Great wedding. - Yeah.
-想"玩玩"吗 -好啊
- Want to fool around? - Yeah.
撩人这过程好刺♥激♥
Ah, the thrill of the chase.
二位 婚礼实在太感人了
Guys, that ceremony was so moving.
我简直情绪泛滥
I was a wreck.
我就像《国土安全》里的女主一样神经质
I was full-on Claire Danes in "Homeland."
我的世界里没那个台
I don't get Showtime.
我们有订这个台 但我不明白那个台想干什么
I mean, we have it. I just don't get it.
亲爱的 你该去看看你奶奶
Hey, babe, you know what? We should check on your nana.
她不太好 她把假牙装在三明治袋子里
She's not doing too good. She's got her dentures
放在自己旁边
sitting next to her in an Arby's bag.
她以为那是她外出用的包包
She thinks that's her going-out purse.
威尔 你能来我很开心
Will, I'm really glad you made it.
我也是 你有两分钟时间吗
Ah, me too. Do you have two minutes?
我想问你件事
There's just something I want to ask
-正好只剩我们两个了 -还有我
- now that it's just us... - And me!
-老天 -让开
- Oh, God. - Move it out.
文斯 婚礼真棒
Hey, Vince, great party.
等不及要尝尝那些肉丸了
Can't wait to try the meatballs.
我刚看到你用牙签一次串了三颗吃掉了
I just saw you eat, like, three off one toothpick.
-难道你是侦探[警探]吗 -不 我没考上
- What are you, a detective? - No, I didn't make it.
天呐 你非得在我的婚礼上揭伤疤吗
Jeez, you gotta rub it in at my wedding?
把我推到丽塔阿姨身边 这招太贱了
Okay, pushing me off on Aunt Rita was a dick move,
但我们一定要乘邮轮出去游玩
but we are so going on a cruise.
我只不过想跟他聊两分钟
I just wanted two minutes with the guy.
就问问 "我们当初为何分手"
You know? "Why did we break up?
原来是这个原因 太好了
Oh, that's why, great.
现在去迎娶那个转发"我吃了早午餐"的男人吧
Now go marry the guy who retweeted, 'I got the brunchies.'"
刚才很爽啊
Well, that was fun.
我偷摸过别人 不过从没摸过警♥察♥
I've copped a feel before, but I've never felt a cop.
我从没跟男人打过炮 所以...
Yeah, well, I've never been with a man before, so...
-你是说真的啊 -是的
- Oh, you're not kidding. - No.
我还以为你不过是技术很渣
Wow, I just thought you were really bad.
也确实渣爆了
Which you were.
我一直很想试试跟男人打炮
I've been wanting to do that for so long.
我很荣幸给你破处
Well, proud to have been your first.
祝你基命百岁 好运一生 表情符号♥马蹄铁
Have a long, gay life. Best of luck, emoji horseshoe,
轮船 一路平安
steamboat, bon voyage.
威尔和格蕾丝
Will & Grace
剧集 | 威尔和格蕾丝 | 导航列表