威尔和格蕾丝

Will & Grace S09E07

Part 2 Jan. 12, 2020, 7:56 p.m.

那就这么定了你在这儿住
It's settled, then. You're staying.
开门
Open the door.
我是你的房♥东范·比利姆斯先生
It's your landlord, Mr. Van Billioms.
是比拉姆·范·比利姆斯吗
As in Billam Van Billioms?
他是全纽约最富有的人之一
He's one of the richest men in New York.
也是最残酷的人之一
And one of the cruelest.
他的心像煤球一样黑
His heart is black as coal,
没人知道原因
and no one knows why.
我洒到你的外套上了
Oh. I've spilled on your coat.
快脱下我帮你洗干净
Take it off, and I'll wash it for ya.
奥苏利文太太
Mrs. O'Sullivan...
你的房♥租还拖着没交
You are late with the rent.
你害我不得不在圣诞节离开我妻子
You forced me to leave my wife on Christmas
来到这肮脏恶心的街区
to travel to this filthy godforsaken neighborhood
这里到处是懒鬼人♥渣♥
full of lazy scum,
这让我的心情非常糟糕
and that has put me in a very bad mood,
这种心情让我一整天都不开心
a mood that has soured my day,
这种心情...你好呀
a mood that has-- oh, hello.
我刚刚都没看到你你好呀
I didn't see you there. Hi.
你...你是奥苏利文先生吗
What, are you--are-- are you Mr. O'Sullivan?
不先生他是来借宿的
No, sir. He's me new boarder.
我叫约翰·帕特里克·麦吉
John Patrick McGee.
我太失礼了我去把外套穿上
Ay, where are me manners? Let me put my coat back on.
别别别别穿了
No, no, no, no, no, leave--leave it off.
没必要那么正式
No need for modesty.
我又不是第一次见男人裸♥露♥的手臂
It's not the first time I've seen a man's naked arms.
我见过的多了去了
I've seen that the usual amount of times.
7次吧
Seven.
而且这里热得像地狱一样
And it is--it is hot as Hades in here.
我都有点想脱衣服了呢
I'm--I--I almost feel like taking off my own coat,
当然我是不会脱的
not that I would.
绝对不会
I never would.
你这个建议太荒唐了
It's a preposterous suggestion!
我绝不会让你的奸计得逞
I won't have you make it!
天黑前把钱准备好
You will have my money by sundown,
否则就给我滚出去
or I'll see you out in the streets.
凡妮
Fanny!
Fanny有"屁♥股♥"的意思
凡妮
Fanny?
凡妮这死婆娘去哪儿了
Fanny! Where is my confounded wife?
我在这里
I'm right here.
喊我♥干♥什么
Why ya hocking me?
天呐你去哪儿了
Oh, my God, where you been?
我一直在到处找你
I've been looking all over for you.
我在楼下准备圣诞鹅肉大餐
I was downstairs, ringing the Christmas goose.
你不觉得你应该悄悄干这种事才对吗
Don't you think you should do that in private?
Goose还可以表示
用手指戳某人的屁♥股♥
那是个精彩的笑话
It's a smart joke.
你不懂其中的笑点别人肯定能懂
You didn't get it. Other people would get it.
没人喜欢抖机灵的女孩凡妮
No one likes a funny girl, Fanny.
你在吃什么鬼东西
What the devil are you eating?
一款新出的曲奇饼干
Oh. It's these new cookies they invented.
双层巧克力奶油夹心饼干
They're two chocolate biscuits with cream on the inside.
叫做"欧雷欧"
They're called "Oh-ray-ohs."
比拉姆我的天
Billam, oh, my God,
欧雷欧饼干太好吃了你尝尝
"Oh-ray-ohs" are so good. Here, here, you gotta try one.
我才不要
Absolutely not.
我好不容易才穿下这马甲
I just fit into this weskit.
吃一块欧雷欧饼干就得在机械马上
It would take 20 minutes on the mechanical horse
运动20分钟才能不长肉
to work off even one "Oh-ray-oh."
凡妮为什么我们家会有竖琴
Fanny, why do we have a harp now?
你又不弹
You don't even play.
放着好看啊天堂般的感觉
It's nice. It's very heaven-y.
你放眼看看
I mean, come on, look around.
在装♥修♥设计这事上我什么时候错过
Have I ever been wrong about decorating?
跟你说我今天早上突然顿悟
In fact, I had an epiphany this morning.
如果我开创一门新的生意
What if I started a new business,
帮别人家装♥修♥怎么样
where I decorate the interiors of other people's homes?
我取了个名字
I would call myself
叫室内设计师
an inside-of-homes decorator.
我妻子要开始做生意...
My wife, starting a business...
休想
Never.
人家会说"比拉姆原本是一家之主
People would say, "Billam used to be the man of the house.
现在全靠他的凡妮"[屁♥股♥]
Now his Fanny runs it."
别老是想这些乱七八糟的凡妮
You've got to get such foolish ideas out of your head, Fanny.
女人就应该支持自己的丈夫
A woman's place is to support her man,
-勤俭持家 -陪他上♥床♥
- keep his home... - Share his bed?
那个没必要不同夫妻间的相处方式也不同
Not necessarily. Every relationship's different.
我没时间跟你说了
Well, I don't have time for this.
我还得去把一家人赶出去
I've got a family to evict.
比拉姆别这样今天可是圣诞节
Oh, Billam, no, you can't. It's Christmas...
也是光明节
and Hanukkah.
凡妮你已经改变信仰了
Fanny, you converted.
别再提光明节了
Please stop mentioning Hanukkah.
光明节
Hanukkah.
光明节
Hanukkah.
-就是"节日快乐"的意思 -够了
- Like... "Happy holidays." - Enough!
有个租客违反合同了
My tenant broke her contract.
虽然我很心疼她那个高大威猛的寄宿者
Though I can't help feeling for her strapping boarder,
没有自己的床可睡
no bed to call his own,
忍♥冻挨饿
out in the cold,
自抱取暖
holding himself for warmth...
用他那健壮结实
With those toned and...
纹身遍布的手臂
tattooed arms.
别再摩擦你的拐杖"棍子"了
Stop polishing your stick.
你已经插过你的屁♥股♥了
You've already rung your goose.
好吧那我走了
Right. I'm off.
小天使们
Well, angels,
就算卖♥♥了斯密特的木制假腿
even after selling Smitty's wooden leg...
房♥租也还差10美元
We're still $10 short of making rent.
有人上来了
Someone's coming up the stairs.
快快躲起来
Quick, quick, go hide.
快点有人要来了
Hurry, they're coming!
谁喜欢女人患了坏血病都没死
Who loves women, survived scurvy,
现在有重大消息要宣布
and has big news?
就是本人
'Tis I!
我在码头那边有一个重大发现
I've discovered something incredible down at the docks.
-他捡到钱了我们得救了 -不不是钱
- He found money. We're saved! - Now, it's not money.
当我没说
Never mind.
如果没有钱我就得将我的肉体
Without money, I'll have to give my body
献给那个恶毒的房♥东比拉姆
to that awful landlord, Billam.
相信我他不会喜欢的
Trust me, he wouldn't enjoy it.
为什么不喜欢
And why not?
虽然我生了九个孩子
I may have delivered nine children,
但他们的头都很小
but most of the heads were tiny.
不凯洛琳他不会喜欢跟任何女人做♥爱♥
No, Karolyn, he wouldn't enjoy it with any women.
那就是我的重大发现
That's what I discovered.
他是个"屎道清洁工"
He's a sweeper of chimneys...
玩"蛇"人
A snake charmer.
他只喜欢"后♥庭♥花"
He only travels by tunnel.
你到底在说什么
What are you saying to me?
他弯得跟卷毛胡须一样
He's a mustache bumper.
他精致讲究喜欢圆柱形"淫器"
He rubs the silverware without a cloth.
他喜欢"吹♥箫♥"
He plays the flute of the damned.
他是个同性恋
He's a homo.
比拉姆等等
Billam, wait.
你不能在圣诞节
I cannot let you put these poor people
把这些可怜的人[穷♥人♥]赶出去
out on the street on Christmas.
这太缺德了
It's not fair.
当初卖♥♥给我这房♥子的先生说过
The gentleman I acquired this property from
人穷只能怪自己