实习医生风云（2001）
Scrubs S06E09
Part 1
Dec. 16, 2020, 1:39 p.m.
第六季 第九集
【实习医生风云】
I'm such a total loser.
我真是太失败了
My girlfriend and I broke up,
女友和我分手了
I live in a tent,
我住在帐篷里
plus I feel sick enough
而且我难受的很
to actually get checked out,
必须得做个检查
and guess who's on call?
可你猜这会儿谁值班
That doesn't look right.
看起来不太对啊
What? What is it?
什么 什么不对
You have a penis, or that's what I think it is.
你居然有"小♥弟♥弟♥" 那应该是个"小♥弟♥弟♥"吧
It's a penis.
就是小♥弟♥弟♥
Fair enough.
好吧
Why don't we go ahead
我们继续进行
and give you that blood test?
给你做个血检吧
I wasn't the only one suffering.
我不是唯一一个被折磨的人
Turk's intern, Milos, was driving him nuts.
Turk的实习生 Milos 快把他气疯了
See, Milos was already an accomplished surgeon
Milos在他战火纷飞的祖国已经是个
in his war-torn homeland,
技艺高超的外科医生了
but he still had to re-do his residency here.
但是到了这儿他要重新开始实习
Okay, everyone, let's take a look
好了 同学们 看看Roth先生
at that subcuticular stitch on Mr. Roth's chest.
胸部的表皮下缝合
That is beautiful.
非常漂亮
We could all learn from
不论是哪个主治医生做的
whatever attending did that.
都值得我们学习
It was me. Would you like to take break?
是我缝的 你要不要休息一下
I finish taking frightened bunnies on rounds.
我可以带这些受惊的小兔子们完成查房♥
No, Milos. I would not like to take a break.
不 Milos 我不想休息
I'm absolutely fine right here, thank you.
我在这儿很好 谢谢
Okay, fine.
好吧 好吧
You know what? Everyone head down to observation
得了 所有人去观察室
and check out Mr. Foley's arm re-attachment.
去看看Floey先生的手臂重接手术
What, you don't think you can learn
怎么 你觉得一场真正的手臂重接
from seeing an actual arm re-attachment, Milos?
手术教不了你什么东西吗 Milos
I re-attach child's arm once
我在一辆生锈的废车里
in rusty shell of car.
重接过一个孩子的手臂
I can still see dead bodies that littered streets
我仍然记得那时尸横遍野
as my country burned to ground.
而我的国家在战火中支离破碎
Milos is so lucky.
Milos好幸运
Turk, you're the only one in the world
Turk 全世界只有你自己
who would think that.
会这么认为
Milos is so lucky. That's what I'm sayin'.
Milos好幸运 我也是这么说的
Brown Bear,
棕熊熊
thanks for spending so much time with me lately.
谢谢你最近一直陪着我
I just feel like
我真觉得
my whole life is in the crapper.
我的人生一团糟
Oh, man, you'll turn this around.
伙计 你会否极泰来的
There goes Buzz and Donna,
Buzz和Donna出来了
off to the marriage counselor.
去做婚姻咨♥询♥了
Buzz feels inadequate
Buzz感觉不太自信
because he lost his job at Foot Locker.
因为他丢了在鞋柜的工作
Now his dingle won't work.
现在他的老二也罢♥工♥了
I should not have given you
我真不该送你
the spy equipment for your birthday.
间谍工具当生日礼物
Are you kidding me?
别开玩笑了
I need it so I know
我需要它来知道
when I can sneak over and use the can.
啥时候可以偷用他们的厕所
And by the way, I'm using the front bathroom now
而且我现在用前面的卫生间了
because it has a hook on the door
因为门上有个钩子
so I can hang up my pants.
我可以把裤子挂那儿
You finally started listening to me.
你终于听我的了
You're right, my friend.
你说的对 我的朋友
Man is the only animal that wears pants during twosies.
人类是唯一穿着裤子上厕所的动物
It's just so unnatural.
太不自然了
Newbie's test results came back.
菜鸟的检查结果出来了
He's got vasovagal syncope.
他得了迷走血管性晕厥
And that makes you happy?
你还这么开心
Lf he's vigorously valsalving,
如果他猛力的憋气
he can activate his reflex
他会条件反射
and actually lose consciousness.
真的晕过去
Carla, he'll pass out when he poops.
Carla 他拉粑粑的时候会晕过去的
Buzz, Donna? How was counseling?
Buzz Donna 咨♥询♥进行的咋样
Would one of you mind handing me my chinos?
你俩谁能帮忙递下我的裤子
Turk, I need help.
Turk 我需要帮助
Buzz is mad.
Buzz好生气啊
Well, I read up on vasovagal syncope.
我研究了一下迷走血管性晕厥
To treat it,
要想治好
I have to work on reducing my stress.
我必须得减轻压力
At least Buzz agreed not to call the cops
起码Buzz同意不报♥警♥了
if I don't tell all the other neighbors
只要我不告诉别的邻居
Donna's barren.
Donna不孕的事
Damn, dude, you got it pretty rough.
该死的 伙计 你真是太倒霉了
You hear that, everybody?
听到了吗 同志们
I do have it rough,
我确实很倒霉
and that's coming from a man who knows a teensy bit about adversity.
而且这话来自于一位很了解不幸的人
And why is that, Turk?
为什么呢 Turk
Because I'm black.
因为我是黑人
No, because you have diabetes.
不 因为你有糖尿病啊
What's hard about being black?
黑人有啥难当的
Hiya! My name is Bob Kelso
你好呀 我叫Bob Kelso
and I like whores.
我喜欢妓♥女♥
Now, why don't I introduce myself like that?
问你们 我为啥不这样介绍自己呢
Because there is a time
因为讲真话
and a place for the truth.
要分时间和地点
Now, you take Dorian's intern,
比如 拿Dorian的实习生
Brendan, for example.
Brendan来举个例子
He told his patient that it was
他告诉他的病人
the first time he was performing a spinal tap.
他是第一次做抽脊髓液
And what did the patient do, Doctor?
然后病人怎么反应的 医生
Well, she started to hyperventilate,
她惊慌的换气过度
and then she reached for a hit
然后她拿起个
of what she thought was an oxygen tank.
她认为是氧气瓶的东西开始吸氧
It turned out to be
结果她拿的是
a helium container from pediatrics.
小儿科的氦气瓶
Then she screams,
然后她开始尖叫
"I'll kill you, bitches!"
"我要杀了你们 贱♥人♥们"
Which, frankly, we all thought was hilarious.
其实老实说我们都认为很搞笑
Oh, indeed it was. But you know what wasn't?
确实搞笑 但是你知道不好笑的时候什么吗
When she ran for the door,
当她夺门而出的时候
tripped and fell and broke her femur.
绊倒了摔断了大腿骨
Now she's suing the hospital,
现在她要起诉医院
and since Ted is our lawyer,
来问问我们的律师Ted
what's going to happen?
接下来会发生什么吧
Girlfriend's gonna get paid.
有人要得到赔偿啦
So, you called this meeting
所以你开这次会是
to say we should lie more?
告诉我们应该撒更多的谎吗
Sorry there, Bobbo,
不好意思了 Bobbo
but I'm gonna go ahead and tell the truth
但是我还是准备想什么时候说实话
whenever I damn well please.
就什么时候说
For instance, your tie. It's hideous.
比如说 你的领带 难看死了
In fact, its only redeeming quality is
事实上它唯一的好处
to divert attention from
就是让人把视线
the very visible outline of your man girdle.
从你明显的男士束身衣上转移开
Too mean. Sorry.
太刻薄了 抱歉
Hey, have fun the next couple days.
嘿 接下来几天好好享受吧
I'm going on vacation.
我要去度假了
And you're taking a mop?
你还带着拖把去
Yeah. It's a custodial cruise.
是啊 是监护旅行
Pretty cool, huh? Check this out.
很酷吧 看看这个
It's really a great package for guys like me.
对我来说真是很棒的项目
Guests have the option of cleaning their own rooms.
客人可以选择自己打扫房♥间
实习医生风云（2001）
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