实习医生风云（2001）
Scrubs S06E01
Part 2
Dec. 16, 2020, 1:37 p.m.
Other activities recently crossed off of that list
其他活动都被取消了
include my morning dump and all showers.
包括早晨的大便时间和洗澡时间
You see, my dear son Jack has decided
是这样 我亲爱的儿子Jack决定
that those are team sports.
那些事得两人一块做
However, I'm here and I'm totally psyched to hear
先不说这些 我人到了 而且特别想听听
whatever the superty-duper reason is that you paged me.
究竟是谁为了什么傻♥逼♥问题 呼我的
Mr. Wyatt's chart said to remove his eight stitches,
Wyatt女士的病历说要拆8针
but we counted nine.
但我们数了数 9针
Should we leave one? That's it.
要不要留1针 好了
Every single one of you is gonna run laps around the hallways
你们都去给我绕走廊跑圈
till I say stop.
我叫停之前不许停
Think I'm kidding?
以为我开玩笑呢吗
Perry, what the hell? I just got a call from Jack's school.
Perry 怎么回事 Jack学校刚给我打完电♥话♥
Apparently, they served spaghetti for lunch,
听说他们中午吃的意面
so he had some sort of Vietnam flashback.
结果把孩子吓哭了
We're having a second baby.
咱们马上就生二胎了
You need to deal with your anger issues.
你易怒的毛病得改改了
I don't have any anger issues.
我才不易怒呢
Dr. Cox, I'm sorry, but my asthma is really starting to...
Cox医生 对不起 我的哮喘要犯了
Get out of here!
快跑
Seriously.
不是吧你
What are you working on, young man?
你忙什么呢 小伙子
New ways to torture that guy. See?
整治那家伙的新办法 看见没
Mrs. Zeebee, I know that we were hoping
Zeebee女士 我知道你希望
that the pain around your areola was simple mastitis,
你乳晕周围的疼痛 只是乳腺炎而已
but it turns out that it's breast cancer.
但是检查结果显示 是乳腺癌
I can't believe this is happening to me.
我真不敢相信
Trust me, I know what you're going through.
相信我 我知道这一切有多难
Just yesterday, I found out that my girlfriend...
昨天 我发现我女朋友
Excuse us.
打扰了
Dude, please tell me you're not comparing getting cancer
哥们 你不是要把患癌和
to knocking up your girlfriend. I was trying to.
女友怀孕作比较吧 我正要说呢
You can't pawn your personal stuff off on your patients.
你不能拿私事去叨扰病人
What about you and the motorcycle accident guy?
那你和那个出摩托车事故的家伙呢
So get this. My pregnant wife has decided that it's okay
听着啊 我怀孕的老婆
to steal my pillow in the middle of the night
在半夜就拽走了我的枕头
and sleep with it in between her legs.
然后夹在双腿中间接着睡
When am I going into surgery?
我什么时候能手术
Oh, we can't start the surgery until the troopers find your foot.
噢 等警♥察♥找到你的脚才能手术
That was different. He said, "What's up?"
那不一样 他问我"怎么样"来着
Hardly seems like much of a punishment
对于来自肯尼亚的孩子来说
for the kid from Kenya.
这根本算不上惩罚啊
I mean, God's sake, he can run all day.
我是说 天呐 他能跑一天
You know, maybe Jordan's right.
你知道 也许Jordan是对的
Maybe it's time you start dealing with your anger issues.
你易怒的毛病是该改改了
Carla, for something to be an issue, it needs to cause a problem.
Carla 毛病 能惹祸的才叫毛病
And, honestly, aside from having to, by law,
再说了 我除了被
remain 30 feet away from a certain telemarketer
那个被我撞见吃晚饭的电♥话♥销♥售♥员
who I visited while he was eating his dinner,
申请了30英尺距离的限制令以外
I don't see the downside.
其他没什么不好的
Mr. Slydell here is suffering from peptic ulcer disease
Slydell先生患有消化性溃疡
and hypertension, two
和高血压
conditions you often see in very angry people.
易怒的人易患的两种疾病
Well, now, you don't know that this gentleman is angry.
你又不清楚这位先生易怒与否
Damn it! Why won't this TV go on?
该死 这电视怎么看不了啦
That was the bed remote.
遥控器是坏的
Ted, I got the cola.
Ted 我弄到可乐了
Did you get the Pop Rocks? No, the vending machine was out,
你弄到跳跳糖了吗 没 自动贩卖♥♥机空了
so I went to the generic store and got some Fizzy Pebbles.
于是我去商店买♥♥了点碳酸鹅卵石
You sure we should do this?
你确定要这么做吗
I'm sick of legends and hearsay, Keith.
传闻我已经听够了 Keith
I have to know!
我要试试
No scuffing. No scuffing!
脚抬起来 别蹭地
Okay, what if I get a sex change operation
好了 我做个变性手术
and I trick him into marrying me?
骗他嫁给我怎么样
But if it doesn't work, you'll just be an older,
但如果没骗成 你就变成
fairly ugly janitor-woman.
又老又丑的清洁女工了
That's true.
说得对
You know, you and I are quite a bit alike.
你知道吗 咱俩挺像的哎
I spent most of my life trying to become a lawyer,
我用了大半辈子的时间成为律师
but I could never get my Juris Doctorate.
但我就是当不成法学博士
How's that make us alike?
这和我哪像了
I spent years trying to get that damn J.D.
我也花了大把时间在J.D.(法学博士缩写)上面
I'm alive!
我还活着
Hey!
嘿
That'll be fun to clean up.
清理起来会很好玩的
You know what's so messed up about this whole baby thing?
你知道怀孕这事哪里最讨厌吗
I mean, I feel like I'm drowning and it hasn't even fazed Kim.
我感觉我快溺死了 可Kim根本不在乎
Okay, let's, close her up.
好了 咱们缝合吧
Dr. Briggs, why are you crying? This song always gets me.
Briggs医生 你哭什么 这首歌♥太伤了
My brother was killed by a Funky Cold Medina.
我哥就是被冷血麦迪那人弄死的
I'm sorry J.D.,
我也很遗憾 J.D
but you knew that this could happen when you had sex.
不过你嘿♥咻♥的时候就该想到这点
I have to tell you guys something,
我要和你们说点事
but you have to promise not to laugh, okay?
但你们得保证不笑 好吗
Oh, no. Absolutely. I'll try.
嗯 绝对不笑 我尽量
Sure.
好的
Okay, on the night of said conception,
好吧 她受孕的那晚
Kim and I nuded up and, the dirty talk began
Kim和我脱♥光♥了 开始讲黄段子
and I got a little over-excited.
然后我就激动过头了
She like the dirty talk?
她喜欢黄段子啊
No, I do. I find it gets the ladies going,
不 我喜欢 我发现黄段子能帮助她们进入状态
but I occasionally get wrapped up in it myself,
但有时候 我太投入了
especially when I do some of my different voices and...
尤其是我用不同的声音时
He does.
真是这样
Anyhoo, there was some unexpected friendly fire.
接着就点燃了意料之外的友谊之火
And, even though I never
嗯 尽管我没能
got a chance to enter the village,
真正进到里面
there was a air strike
但是在外♥围♥区域
on one of the outlying regions.
有场空袭
Thank you.
多谢
Anyway, I spoke to the gals up in OBG
我和妇产科的女医师谈了谈
and they said it's not uncommon for a woman to get pregnant
她们说正常情况下
even if there was no actual penetration.
没射入就怀孕的可能性也是有的
What you're trying to tell us is that
你绕了半天就是想说
you never actually had sex with her?
你俩没嘿♥咻♥吗
No, I didn't have a condom.
没 我没有避孕套
And we decided not to have sex because,
我们决定不嘿♥咻♥是因为
here's the kicker,
笑点来了
I didn't want to get her pregnant.
我不想她怀孕
Oh, no, you didn't.
噢 不 你不想
As I thought about
当我想到命运待我
how Mrs. Zeebee and I had gotten such a raw deal,
和Zeebee女士如此不公
I realized how easy it was for doctors to see themselves
我发现医生们很容易在患者身上
in their patients.
看到自己
Whether it's in the choices they made in their life...
不论是他们做出的人生选择
My anger not only cost me my health,
我易怒的脾气 不仅毁了我的健康
it also cost me my job, my marriage.
还毁了我的工作 我的婚姻
It cost me damn near everything.
几乎毁掉了一切
You're killing me.
真要命啊
or the choices they didn't make.
还是他们没能做出的选择
I was so obsessed with getting my J.D.
我太想当上法学博士了
That I never did the things I really wanted to do.
结果错过了自己真正想做的事
Start a family, see the world... Punch a whale.
建立家庭 周游世界 打鲸鱼
No, I punched a whale, right in the face.
不 鲸鱼我打过了 正好打在脸上
Down he went, like Liston.
然后它就沉下去了 像Liston一样
Either way, it forces you to face your problems head-on.
不论哪样 都逼着你正视自身的问题
There you are. You ready to grab some lunch so that we can talk?
你在这啊 准备好去边吃边谈了吗
Or not.
但我还是无法♥正♥视
You know what, Kim, I don't think I can handle this right now.
那个 Kim 我觉得我现在还无法应对这件事
实习医生风云（2001）
Scrubs
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