老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S03E09
Part 1
Oct. 30, 2020, 3:42 p.m.
Back when we were dating, Robin and I had this running joke
罗宾和我还在一起的时候 我们经常讲这个笑话
We were the only two people in the world who found it funny
我们是世上仅有的两个觉得它好笑的人
No way March just not have 31 days
三月份不可能有31天
Yes it does everyone knows that it's like general knowledge
当然有 每个人都知道 这是常识
general knowledge
知识将军
And we did it all the time
我们一直在玩这个
Isn't it sad that I mean in 2007 some countries...
2007年的时候有些国家依然容忍♥
actually still condone corporal punishment
体罚的存在 不是很令人唏嘘吗
corporal punishment
惩罚下士
Because once you start, it's surprisingly hard to stop
因为一旦开始 就出人意料得很难停下来
Oh man I got kernel stuck in my teeth
天呐 有个核卡在我牙里了
kernel stuck in my teeth
牙里卡核上校
Please stop. I hate you.
停下来吧 我恨你们
But now we were broken up so when Marshall said
但是现在我们分手了 所以当马修说
but after the first year I get a major pay raise
第一年过后 我得到了重要涨薪
We just let it slide
我们就这么让它过去了
You see on the surface, Robin and I look like we were doing great
从表面上看 罗宾和我关系不错
But the truth is trying to be
但事实上
friends with your ex is a lot hard than it looks.
和你的前任做朋友比看起来难得多
You can't be as candid as you used to be.
你不能再像从前一样坦诚
So then this hot intern leans over my desk,
当这个火♥辣♥的实习生靠在我桌子旁
I can totally see she has a pierced...
我能清楚地看到她有个穿孔的
Brosnan.
布鲁斯南
Pierce Brosnan is my favorite of all the Bonds.
皮尔斯•布鲁斯南是我最喜欢的邦德
But most importantly, you can never, ever be alone together.
但最重要的一点 你们永远 永远不能再单独在一起
I gotta go.
我得走了
I'm gonna go pay.
我去付钱
Peeing.
我去上厕所
I'm gonna help Marshall pay. I'm gonna help Lily pee.
我去帮马修付钱 我去帮莉莉上厕所
All right, we have a turkey.
好 我们有火鸡啦
Yeah, we do.
是的
Isn't this exciting?
很兴奋吧
Our first Thanksgiving together as a group.
我们小团体的第一个感恩节
Yeah, this is gonna be the best Slapsgiving ever.
是啊 这肯定会是最好的耳光节了
What?
什么
I said this is going to be the best Thanksgiving ever.
我说这肯定会是最棒的感恩节了
Yeah, this is going to be great.
嗯 一定很棒
Just the five of us, right?
只有我们五个对吧
Oh, uh, that reminds me: I invited Bob.
呃 你提醒我了 我邀请了鲍勃
Bob?
鲍勃
You've been on, like, three dates with that guy.
你才跟那个人约会了三次吧
We haven't even met him.
我们都没见过他
Well, he didn't have anywhere else to go,
他说他没处可去
and I didn't know what to say.
我还能说什么
Is really that big deal?
至于那么严重吗
Yes. This is our first thanksgiving.
是的 这是我们的第一个感恩节
30 years from now, we're going to look at the photos and say,
三十年后 我们会看着相片说
"Oh, there's the four people I love most in the world. And Bob. "
"噢 这是世界上我最爱的四个人 和鲍勃"
I'm sorry, sometimes I forget
对不起 有时候我忘了
how seriously you guys take American Thanksgiving.
你们有多重视美国感恩节
Real Thanksgiving happened over a month ago.
真正的感恩节一个月前就过了
I'm sorry.
对不起
Did you just say Canadian Thanksgiving was and I'm quoting,
你刚才是说加拿大感恩节 用你的原话
"The real Thanksgiving"?
是"真正的感恩节"吗
What do Canadians even have to celebrate about?
加拿大人到底有什么可庆祝的
Canadian Thanksgiving
加拿大感恩节是为了纪念
celebrates explorer Martin Frobisher's valiant yet
探险家马丁•法贝瑟勇敢
ultimately unsuccessful attempt to find the Northwest Passage.
但最终夭折的西北航道探索行动
Why are you guys even a country?
你们怎么能算是个国家的
Oh, hey, by the way, if anyone wants to come over early on Thursday,
哦 对了 如果你们谁周二想早点来
we can watch the Slapsgiving Day Parade.
我们可以一起看耳光节游♥行♥
Well, there, you said it again.
就是那个词 你又说了一遍
Said what?
说什么了
Slapsgiving.
耳光节
Oh, I guess I did.
噢 我是这么说的
You know why? I've invented a new holiday: Slapsgiving.
你知道为什么吗 我发明了一个新节日 耳光节
It's the one day we set aside
每年这个特别的日子
each year to gather together and give slaps.
我们聚在一起 打耳光
I should explain.
我应该解释一下
Kids, you remember the slap bet.
孩子们 你们还记得耳光赌吧
A yearlier, Marshall made a bet
一年前 马修和巴尼打赌
with Barney and won the right to slap him five times.
并赢得了五次打他耳光的权力
He had already used the first.
他已经用了第一次
And the second.
和第二次
But Marshall had something special in store for the third.
但是马修为第三次准备了点特别的东西
Slapcountdown. Com.
耳光倒数网
No.
不
No, no.
不不不
The countdown ends at 3:00 p. M. The day after Thanksgiving.
倒计时最终停在感恩节后一天的下午三点
I counted it out.
我算过了
How many days are in October?
十月份有几天
Uh, thirty.
呃 三十天
Dude, I thought we cleared this up last year.
哥们 我记得去年我们澄清过了
I like Halloween very much. Is nice.
我特别喜欢万圣节 太棒了
Is also tomorrow.
是明天
Damn it!
真讨厌
Wait, you're gonna slap me on Thanksgiving?
等等 你要在感恩节那天打我耳光
Slapsgiving.
是耳光节
That's not allowed.
这可不行
Lily, you're the Slap Bet Commissioner, is that allowed?
莉莉 你是耳光仲裁员 这可以吗
The hostess in me who's using her wedding...
我身体里那个第一次用婚礼瓷器的
china for the first time wants to say hell, no,
女主人想要说不行
but yeah, I'm going to allow it.
但是 我允许了
Well, you know what?
好吧 你知道吗
If you're trying to freak me out about spending Thanksgiving...
如果你想在你家过感恩节...
Slapsgiving.
是耳光节
At your place, then you failed.
...的时候吓唬我 那你的打算可落空了
Truth is, I'm not scared. Really?
事实上 我不害怕 真的吗
Right. 'Cause you blew it.
是的 因为你搞砸了
The worst part about getting slapped
被打耳光最不爽的一点就是
is not knowing when it's going to happen.
你不知道什么时候会发生
But now I know exactly when I'm gonna get slapped.
但现在我切切实实地知道什么时候会被打
So, you took all the suspense out.
所以 你把所有的悬念都抹杀了
You showed your hand.
你摊牌了
And Thursday at 3:01 p.m.
星期四下午三点零一分
your face is going to show my hand.
你的脸会烙上我的手印
Oh, there's Bob!
噢 那就是鲍勃
By the way, heads up, he's a little bit older than us.
先说一下 他比我们年纪大点
How old is he?
有多大
He's forty-one.
四十一
Hey, Bob! Over here!
嘿 鲍勃 在这里
Okay, kids, the truth is, Bob probably looked like this.
好吧 孩子们 事实上 鲍勃看起来可能是这样
Hey, sweetie. Hi.
嘿 亲爱的 嗨
But when your ex is dating someone new,
但是当你的前任找到新欢之后
your mind tends to accentuate their flaws.
你的思维往往会把他们的缺点放大
This is how I saw Bob.
鲍勃在我眼里是这样的
Hey, dudes, what's crackin'?
嘿 伙计们 最近怎样
Hey, man, how are you? Good to meet you.
嘿 哥们 你好 很高兴见到你
Sorry I'm late.
抱歉 我来晚了
I just got off the phone with my parents.
我刚和我父母通完电♥话♥
Parents?
父母
They were totally on my case:
他们总是指责个没完
"What are you gonna do with your life? You're forty-one. "
"你之后的人生怎么办 你都四十一了"
And I'm like, "Chillax, snowboarding is a legit career.
我就说"淡定 滑雪板运动是项正当职业
You ought to be stoked I found my bliss. "
你们应该为我找到人生方向而庆幸"
And speaking of bliss, sugar me, baby.
说到天赐的福分 给我点甜头吧 宝贝
Let's go get a drink.
我们去拿点喝的
Unbelievable.
难以置信
Robin is dating Orville Redenbacher.
罗宾在和奥威尔•瑞登巴克交往
What are you talking about?
你在说什么呢
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
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