糟糕历史（2009）
Horrible Histories S01E08
Part 4
Jan. 3, 2021, 2:24 p.m.
我的牙一点也不疼了 谢谢
My tooth doesn't hurt any more at all. Thank you.
真逗 好几个病人都这样
Funny, a lot of my clients do that. Hmph!
可怕的一战
一战是如何全面打响的
How the first World War all started
真的很难说清 不是一般的难
was really complicated, and I mean complicated.
快来看 为结束大战 英国意图参战
Read all about it. Britain on brink of war to end all wars.
每日小报
先生们 我们正面临一个艰难的抉择
Gentlemen, we face a most difficult decision.
英军司令部 1914年
-天哪 -没错 要茶还是咖啡
- Oh dear, Sir. - Yes, now, tea or coffee?
确实不好选
You're right, that is difficult.
不是说这个 蠢材
That's not the decision, you fool!
不是吗 长官
Isn't it, sir?
不是 我们面临的抉择比那困难多了
No, we face a more difficult decision than that.
先生们 世界大战要来了
Gentlemen, we are facing a great war.
-战争 -没错 战争
- War? - Yes, war.
为什么
Why?
为什么要打仗吗
Why war?
因为在波斯尼亚有个奥地利人
Because an Austrian has been killed
被一个塞尔维亚人杀了
by a Serb in Bosnia,
那意味着要打仗
and that means war.
好的 明白了
Ah! I see.
-长官 -什么事 马尔崔福斯
- Sir? - Yes, Maltravers?
为什么奥地利人在波斯尼亚
Why does an Austrian being killed
被塞尔维亚人杀死就意味着打仗 长官
by a Serb in Bosnia mean war, sir?
因为俄♥国♥
Huh, because of Russia!
为什么呢
Ah! Why?
因为俄♥国♥支持塞尔维亚
Because Russia supports Serbia
而奥地利支持波斯尼亚 以此类推
and Austria supports Bosnia, and so on.
我支持阿森纳
I support Arsenal!
闭嘴 布伦金索普
Shut up, Blenkinsop!
所以奥地利人在波斯尼亚
So an Austrian has been
被塞尔维亚人所杀 就导致
killed by a Serbian in Bosnia, which means
奥地利可能侵略塞尔维亚
Austria might invade Serbia
然后俄♥国♥就可能入侵奥地利
and then Russia will invade Austria?
-没错 还有问题吗 -是的 长官
- Correct! Any questions? - Yes, sir.
又怎么了 马尔崔福斯
What is it, Maltravers?
这关英国什么事 长官
How does this involve Britain, sir?
马尔崔福斯 谁是你最好的朋友
Well, Maltravers. Who would you say is your best friend?
布伦金索普 长官 他可是个好小伙
Oh, Blenkinsop, sir. He's a spiffing fellow!
如果我一拳打在布伦金索普鼻子上
Mm. And if I were to punch Blenkinsop in the nose,
你觉得你会怎么做
what do you think you would do?
没人打了布伦金索普还能安然无恙
Well. Nobody punches Blenkinsop and gets away with it!
谢啦 老伙计
Thanks, old bean!
没错没错 如果俄♥国♥威胁到奥地利
Exactly, exactly. So, if Russia threatens Austria,
奥地利的盟友就会提供帮助
Austria's best friend will offer support.
奥地利的盟友是哪个
And who is Austria's best friend?
-不是布伦金索普吧 -不 是德国
- Not Blenkinsop? - No, Germany!
德国是奥地利的盟友 马尔崔福斯
Germany is Austria's best friend, Maltravers.
奥地利和德国坐在树上
Austria and Germany, sitting in a tree,
你侬我侬玩亲亲
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
没错
Yes!
如果俄♥国♥出兵攻打奥地利
So, if Russia were to attack Austria,
德国就会反♥攻♥俄♥国♥
Germany would attack Russia.
但这会造成德国其他地区防守缺失
But that will leave Germany undefended on the other side.
因此 如果德国要攻打俄♥国♥的话
So if Germany were to attack Russia,
这真的是英国参战的原因
它就得同时进攻法国
she would also have to attack France.
-法国 -没错 就是法国
- France? - Yes, France!
如果德国真的和法国开战
And if Germany were to attack France,
而且真的有这么复杂
比利时就会陷入危险
it would leave Belgium threatened,
比利时可是我们的铁哥们
and Belgium is our friend.
所以 我们要义无反顾地保卫它
So we would hop in there to defend them.
所以说 这就是我们
So we've all got to go
被扯进这场战争的原因吗 长官
and fight in a war because of that, sir?
没错 马尔崔福斯
Yes, Maltravers.
我可能会因此送命的 长官
Well, I might get killed, sir!
的确有可能 马尔崔福斯
Yes, you might, Maltravers,
但这都是为了崇高事业而做出的牺牲
but it would all be for a good cause.
那波斯尼亚在哪儿来着
So where is Bosnia again?
战
战争来了
It was war.
斗
终极战斗机的研发比赛也开始了
And the race to develop the ultimate fighter plane was on.
机
这是位一战时期的英国飞行员
Here's one of our jolly old World War One fighter pilots.
他机上配备了最先进的战斗装备
He's equipped with the very latest fighting equipment.
一块砖头
A good old brick.
没错 把它丢到德国人头上
That's right, just drop it on the German's head.
很不幸 没砸中
Unlucky, just missed him!
但砸到了一只狗
But you did hit a dog.
别担心 那是只德国牧羊犬
Don't worry, it was a German Shepherd!
这是什么
What's this?
总部给飞机上装了支机关枪
The boys at HQ have mounted a machine gun on the plane.
这主意不错
That's a capital idea.
看德国佬怎么应对
Let's see what Gerry makes of this.
小心螺旋桨
Mind the propeller!
真悲剧
Oh, dear.
天啊
Golly!
看来总部的精英们想出了更好的办法
Looks like those brainy boys at HQ have cracked it this time.
枪♥支♥配备了计时装置
The gun is fitted with a timing device
保证子弹从螺旋桨
so the bullets fire through
旋转的空隙中射出
the gaps in the turning propeller.
等等 怎么回事
Hold on, what's this?
德国佬俘获了一架我们的飞机
Gerry has captured one of our planes
并剽窃了我们最新的设计
and copied the new design.
真是的 再见了 好小伙
Ah, well. Toodle-pip, old boy!
这是真的
It's true.
一战期间 英德两国飞行员
British and German pilots in World War I
真的会从飞机上扔砖头
really did drop bricks from their planes.
除此之外 德国飞行员还会扔什么
But what else did the Germans drop?
A 炮弹
Was it A. Cannon Balls
B 钢镖
B. Steel Darts
C 棉絮
Or C. Cotton Wool
答案是
The answer is
B 钢镖
B. Steel Darts
如果砸到人 它们可以把人
If they hit a man, they could split him in half
从头到脚劈成两半
from head to foot.
卑微的中世纪
在中世纪
In the Middle Ages
我们农民受够了生活的不公
us peasants got so fed up with how unfair life was,
于是发起了一场农民起义
that we had a peasants' revolt,
领头人名叫神马·泰勒
led by a man called Wat Tyler.
神马·泰勒
多有趣的名字啊 神马·泰勒
Funny name that, Wat Tyler.
肯定搞得人们一头雾水
Must have been really confusing.
重点是 那些贵族拥有土地
But the thing is, the barons own all the land
肯特郡农田 1381年
而我们农民却要为他们劳作
and us peasants have to work it for them.
他们锦衣玉食
They lived la-di-da lives,
我们却得面朝黄土背朝天
while we spend our days up to our necks in muck.
这不公平 对吗
It doesn't seem fair, does it?
不公平 我们能做什么
No! What can we do about it?
我们要发起一场农民起义
We're going to start a peasants' revolt.
太好了
Yes!
有个人在组织这场起义 他叫神马·泰勒
There's a man organising this uprising, name of Wat Tyler.
-他叫什么 -是的
- What was his name? - That's right.
不 领头人的名字叫什么
No, what is the name of our leader?
就是这名
Got it in one.
他是说如果我们去见这位领头人 问他
No, he means if we was to go up to our leader and say,
您好 领头人先生 如何称呼您
"Hello, Mr Leader Man, what should we call you?"
他会说什么
What would he say?
他会答 神马
He'd say Wat.
我就是问你这个 他名字叫什么
That's what I want you to tell us. What's his name?
-你说对了 -不是
糟糕历史（2009）
Horrible Histories
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