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就在这位母亲生下了这个孩子的时候
Just as the mother gave birth to the child,
她也赋予了我生命
the mother gave birth to me.
你提到了她的祖先 这位父亲
You speak of her ancestors, father.
你觉得是谁创造了我
Who do you think created me?
不要啊
No!
不会的 不可能
It can't be, it's not possible.
那个怪物说你的人创造了他
What did that monster mean when...
是什么意思
he said your people created him?
他们为什么要这样诅咒她
Why would they curse her like this?
你怎么能这么做
How could you do this?
你怎么能对我们的小女儿
How could you do this
做出这种事
to our little girl!
帐篷不错 小伙子们
Lovely tent, lads.
嗨吉卜林
Yo, Kipling,
你做到了
you made it.
你的屁♥股♥口罩呢
Hey, Where's your butt mask?
不需要了
Don't need it.
一切顺利进行
Got 'em exactly where I want them.
除非他们杀了我 不然我就会启动计划
Unless they kill me, I'll initiate my plan.
他们肯定不会怀疑的
Damn! They'll never suspect that.
《肥布斯》
《末日巡逻队》拍第二季 天啊为什么
你们来了
There you guys are.
欢迎
Welcome.
你们都安顿好了吗
Are you all settled in?
好的
All right.
让我解释一下接下来会发生的事
Let me explain what's about to happen.
非常简单
It's all very simple.
就在我们说话的时候
As we speak,
与你们相连接的机器
the machine you're hooked up to
正在从你们有趣的小脑袋里
is draining a substance called Idyat,
抽出一种叫叫"蠢"的物质
from your quaint little brains
并把它转化成
and converting it into a resource that we call...
乌玛果冻
Uma Jelly.
乌玛果冻
Uma Jelly.
乌玛果冻是纯粹的
Uma Jelly is pure,
未经雕琢的启示
uncut enlightenment.
瓶装的进化潜能
Bottled evolutionary potential, not...
不是浓缩物
from concentrate.
谢谢 谢谢
Thank you, thank you.
真的谢谢你们
No, seriously, thank you.
我们抽空你们脑子里的"蠢"之后
Once we drain all the Idyat from your brains,
你们都会大便失禁 然后死掉
each of you will shit your pants and die.
所以谢谢你们
So, thank you.
别轻举妄动 小子
Hey, don't make any sudden moves, man.
把你的包给我
Give me your backpack.
现在就把包取下来 快点
Take it off right now, get it off!
-我在取了 -不然我就一枪...
- I'm taking off the backpack! -I will shoot you...
-一枪打死你 -求求你 不要啊
- I will shoot you right now! - Please, don't.
抱歉
I'm sorry,
扎到你了吗
did that sting?
天啊
Holy cow.
感觉真不错
I feel amazing.
讲真 我从未尝试过劲这么大的乌玛果冻
Seriously, I've never had Uma Jelly this potent before,
太爽了
I'm tingling.
你们这些小鸟肯定有一些真实而深入的
You chickadees must have some truly, deeply,
坏主意
terrible ideas.
不过真是可悲
However so tragic,
你们是彼此最坏的点子
you're each other's worst idea.
就像
Like...
鸭子在和龙虾做朋友
a duck being friends with a lobster.
这倒没错
That's right.
她说得对
She was right,
你不属于这里
you don't belong here.
你最大的错误就是以为自己可以留下来
Your biggest mistake is thinking that you can stay.
厉害啊 这你都知道
That's amazing, you nailed me.
亲爱的 我不是在和你说话
Darling, I wasn't talking to you.
我是在和那个可怜的
I was talking to that poor little...
迷失的
stray
在你体内的小东西说话呢
living inside you.
威洛比 你召唤她多少次
Doesn't matter how many times
都没有用的
you summon her, Willoughby.
她不会爱你的
She'll never love you.
她就爱吹牛
She's a talking horse
她也没有躯干
and she has no torso.
你对此一无所知
You don't know that.
如果有心也不必非要躯干
You don't need a torso to have a heart.
有趣
Interesting.
我还从未见过
I've never met someone...
有人会对我们的斯甘茈免疫
who displayed an immunity to our Scantiflcation.
-你叫什么 -米兰达
- What's your name? - Miranda.
米兰达
Miranda.
你有什么秘密
What's your secret?
我知道你心里有个坏主意
I mean, I know there's a bad idea in there,
我能嗅出来
I can smell it.
也许是史上最坏的一个主意
Perhaps one of the worst ideas of all time.
但不知你用了什么方法在对我隐瞒
But somehow, you're keeping it from me.
我们只需要把它榨出来
We just need to squeeze it out.
吃
屎
我的水床坏了
My water bed broke!
来人 快拿修补工具
Somebody, get the patch kit!
我们现在回家吧
Shall we go home now'?
-我觉得 -知道吗
- I think-- - You know what--
我或许真该
I should probably just--
不 别听那个可恶的蠢货
No, screw that nasty ass...
那个吃耳屎的变♥态♥
earwax-eating freak.
她算老几说我们在一起是坏主意
Like, who is she to say it's a bad idea for us to be together?
她可是坏主意女王
Well, she's the queen of bad ideas.
我觉得她在这个问题上还是
So, I'm guessing she kinda has an authority
-有点权威的 -如果我们想在一起
- on that subject. - Look, if we want to do this,
那就该在一起
then we should just do it.
我喜欢你
I like you.
很喜欢
A lot.
你怎么想
So, What do you say?
我记得你说的是你爱我
I thought you said you loved me?
-但那是在我 -你其实不是这个意思吗
- But that was when I was-- - So you didn't really mean it?
我逗你呢 伙计
I'm just fucking with you, dude.
感谢你尽量礼貌地让我失望
Thank you for trying to let me down gently.
好吧
Okay.
那是之前在我
That was, uh, before when I--
所以你觉得你现在是个喜剧演员了吗
Well, yeah, so you think you're a comedian now, huh?
-我打赌我会是个好演员 -真的吗
- I bet I can be one. - Is that right?
那逗我乐一个
Give me something to laugh at.
我得走了
I gotta go.
你走吗
You coming?
我要等奈尔斯
I'm going to wait for Niles.
会给我打电♥话♥吗
Call me later?
看吧
We'll see.
需要帮忙吗 先生
Can I help you, sir?
是的 住在这间病房♥的病人
Yeah, the patient who was in this room,
戴克斯·崔纳
Dex Trainor--
今天下午退房♥出院了
Checked out this aftemoon.
他还...
Was he, uh...
他情况怎么样
How was he?
我不能和你说他的具体情况
I can't tell you anything specific...
可我们不会让还没康复的
but we don't tend to release people
病人出院
who are still sick.
谢谢
Thanks.
克里夫
Cliff.
克拉拉
Clara.
你的朋友维克让我进来的
Your friend Vic let me in.
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